Hit the wall.
it caused me to fall.
breaking the cup i was holding in my hands.
i was ready to be called.

it hurt.
it caused me pain.
it hurt my heart.

time wiped away traces of it many years later.

brushed the wound against the wall.
i remembered the fear that made me fall.
the thing that made me miss the call.

"stop remembering...just forget..."
"stop remembering...just forget..."
"stop remembering...just forget..."
"stop remembering...how can i forget..."
"stop remembering...just forget...its not that easy to forget."

"me, just remember to forget next time..."


but...through all this...
no matter how many times you scratch on that wound,
just know, and remind yourself to remember,
that

I WOULD NEVER BACK DOWN.

Persevere.
Patience.
Wait out the storms and sadness.
The darkness and famine.
You may not know
what you desire at this moment,
but the years throughout life
go by slowly.
You will eventually find your calling.

Hello everyone,

  I'm so very sorry … I feel horrible doing this, but I have no choice. You see, I have published my first book on Amazon/Kindle! This piece (and many others) had to be taken down because they do not allow published material to be available online for free. (Go figure) I wanted to leave the shell of the posts because I felt compelled to leave all your helpful and loving comments. (Silly sentimental, I know), but I also didn't want to just have the pieces disappear without an explanation. I feel bad enough as it is!

  I owe ALL of you so, SO much for all of your reads, love, and support. It was YOU that gave me the gumption to FINALLY get off my **** and publish! Thank you all for the warm comments, camaraderie, and encouragement! I will still be here, reading, uploading and just being the Rascal that I am. How could I EVER leave you guys?

  The book is called “The Way I See It – FictionPhilosophySoul Food” and it will be FREE for the first few days on Kindle Select, so watch for it, if you are interested. I hope that you go and grab it. If you do, I would also hope that you find it worthy, you would leave me a good review. That will help me get in the public eye! Soon afterwards (2-3 days or so), it will be available in paperback.

Find the book(s) here: www.amazon.com/author/jeff.gaines

Or find the book(s), and all about me, here: www.JeffGaines.world

  Soon after, I also hope to have my first novel (a supernatural thriller), called “Wanderer” available as well!

  Wish me luck!

                                Big, Biggest Love,

                                               Jeff Gaines

Reading through the poems
They all seem awfully sad
Everyone sounds so blue
Why does life seem so bad?

My beautiful people, take a step back.
Breathe in, clear your thoughts,
Now focus and get back on track

Stop building up walls
And start building some doors.
Life is to short to stall,
stop accepting what your given and start asking for more.

I can barely open my eyes
Can barely open my mind
Can barely fake a smile

Im not sad nor mad
Just depleted
Utterly defeated to this aching head

The tension rising in the back of my neck
Im slumped forward on my desk
Eyes open mind asleep
I silently admit defeat
As I smile
As I nod
Stifling a yawn
No, a sob

I sit up, grab a coffee cup
Feel the fake energy rush through my veins
Get through another day
My mind in overdrive
My thoughts faster than the speed limit
Unable to slow down

Work hard for the hall of fame
It's a shame, it's just out of arm's reach. You tell me: Persevere
You tell me, to hold on my dear

So I listen and then I go home
I am a mindless drone
I soar, rise and fall
Then float in between

Know what I mean?

So I wonder
At what point
Are we sacrificing too much?
Compromising too much?
And getting too little in return?

Maybe if you didn't know better
when you looked inside my shoe box
you'd think it was just paper

but that paper has more value
than all the cash you can stuff in a wallet
because that box has the papers
that put a smile on my face
that keep me going, on days
when I just have no go left

And if you are important enough
to make it in the shoe box
then in my mind you have done something right
And Ali had done something right
She had told me to persevere
when everyone told me to give up
she said that sometimes love is worth waiting for
And I was the only one who could possibly know
if he was the type of love, you wait for

As I sat unpacking my room
still caught in the love that tangled me up
A note slipped out of the box
and her words caught my eye
"Sometimes **** love can feel like a fairytale,
And sometimes fairytale love can feel like ****"

It made me feel like maybe it was okay
to still love him
Because our love was never ****
It just felt like **** some days
But nothing is perfect
And I am not one for giving up
Especially not on fairytale love