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Gideon 4d
Loud head. Silent mouth.
Loud thoughts. Empty words.
Loud pain.
Screaming, deafening pain.
Numbness.
Millee 5d
...
numb and drained
life is being ****** from me
its vibrant colors slowly fading to gray
leaving me empty

life has no meaning
i'm not living this way
only existing because im a coward
afraid to throw it all away

a pull of a trigger
a swipe of a knife
small simple things
to end my life

this isn't a plea
no i don't want your sympathy
go take it and use it
for someone other than me
cerul wasnt an average child.
they were smart
kind
charming
elegant
sweet

at least thats what adults told them.
cerul didnt lack much
save for... inspiration. cerul wasnt one to be inspired easily.
cerul looked at all the other colorful children and then looked down upon their dark grey hands.
they felt ugly.
one fateful day, crimson happened to walk up to cerul and they sat together. crimsor took down her flowing, bright red hair and put her tie into ceruls hair. a flow of red went through their pale hair.
crimson smiled and left.

cerul was jealous.
to them it came easy.
they never lost color.
or inspiration.
they didnt lack talent.
colorful children were always favoured.
they would never have a home.

cerul talked to all kinds of people.
sage
aqua
prussian
even prune and azure.

none of them had advice.

cerul sat against the floor one day and cried. for many hours they cried.
they cried until the grey smudged into black.
until the red rushed from their hair.
until they were numb again.

cerul waited for something; anything to happen.
and nothing ever did.
cerul.
working on this for a contest! lmk how i did.
Today I am…
A wisp of hazy cloud, drifting aimlessly.
A sponge, wrung dry. Only ***** suds remain.
A drop of water, endlessly falling—drip… drip… drip…
The colour grey. A dull shade. Just… there.
A fallen cup, its drink long evaporated.
A rock, lying on the riverbed, unmoving, watching life swim by.
Down Day
Numb to touch
pressure under my skin.

Electric brush
stroke finely pricked.

Mind of innocence
Petals freshly plucked.

Left to adorn
shrouding my affliction.

Mine to live and lead
As partners pass and fade.
I am not my infection. I am not my illness. Rejection hurts but it's a learning curve.
Ashar Feb 28
A whisper starts, a doubt takes hold,
Are feelings gone, a story told?
Success and loss, a vibrant hue,
Yet senses fade, what once felt true.
The taste of joy, the sting of pain,
Recalled like sun, or falling rain.
But touch is lost, a phantom limb,
Where feeling danced, now shadows dim.
Not blankness born of empty days,
But absence deep, in hollow ways.
Joy, grief, and love, mere words they seem,
A barren plain, a broken dream.
The memory aches, a cruelest jest,
Of colors seen, now put to test.
A void expands, a chilling fear,
The vibrant soul, no longer near.
Yet hope remains, a fragile thread,
To reignite, what lies as dead.
Reflection's path, a winding way,
To find the spark, that slipped away.
A lonely fight, a hidden plea,
How to explain, what others see?
Empathy's ghost, a hollow sound,
In silent depths, where truth is bound.
A fleeting warmth, a sudden rage,
A glimpse of life, upon the stage.
Like desert rain, a moment brief,
Then thirst returns, beyond belief.
But whispers stay, a fragile sign,
That brokenness, is not divine.
No charted course, no guiding hand,
Just memory's compass, in this land.
Though limbo's fear, may ever loom,
A single ember, breaks the gloom.
A breath of hope, a whispered prayer,
To fan the flames, and find what's there.
The "phantom limb" metaphor: It's a perfect analogy for the way we can still feel the echoes of emotions that are no longer present.
Reece Feb 26
Sometimes,
I don’t feel anything,
Not something bad,
Just nothing at all.
Head feels clouded with fog,
The contagious, corruptive smog.
Slowly,
Killing,
Me,
From the inside out,
One day,
I’ll be free,
From this apathy.
I’ll learn to care again,
I’ll find myself again,
I will…
I think sometimes everyone feels a little numb, and it's such a strange feeling. At least it's always temporary.
Nothing works,
I took all they gave.
Therapy,
Diagnoses,
Drugs.

And they took all I had.
Blades,
Technology,
Privacy,
My sense of self.

All to get "better."
"Better."

It seems that nothing works.
I'm just the same as before.
Or - I can't remember before,
I don't think I was there for that,
I was off where my own thoughts couldn't hurt me
(Maybe it got so bad because I wasn't there. I let go of my body and let It take the steering wheel and steer me towards my death.)

All I know is that right now, I feel like
nothing.
nothing.
nothing.

You were supposed to fix it.
What happened?
Why does nothing work?
All that I'm doing is losing its significance, and as I continuously fail at basic human interaction and my motivation to do anything that makes me noteable, I fear that I am too losing significance.
Just slowly slipping into the numbing, pulsing pain.
I'm probably not going to **** myself.
lose myself into the void.
fall asleep in silence
in my eyes emotions devoid.
I'll just take a bunch of pills or cut my pretty wrists
distract myself from the sirens and ball them into fists.
im probably not gonna **** myself
theres not enough reason to
no one who can help me
nothing at all

i know ill upset someone
i know people would be mad
but this overwhelming sadness
this numbness
this emptiness

the voices getting louder
the people screaming in my ears
the stupid stupid noise

i know i wont.
im too scared.
i dont want to die.
i just want to feel again
im so tired
sell me
sell me
sell me something sweet
sell me something x
and i'll lap it up
like i've never tasted something
sweeter than-
and i'll get drunk
on it
vomiting something deep
wishing to be in
never to be parted with
and i'll get drunk
and ***** it-

sell me something x
sell me something ***
sell me something less
sell me something next
and i'll lap it up
like i've never tasted
like i've never dreamt-
and i'll get drunk
on it
watching what little i have in me
swimming away
in a pool of me
swimming away
in a pool of me
swimming away
in a pool of me.
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