I miss you.

I miss your smile
and how your cheeks would rise
to reveal slightly yellowed teeth
creating wrinkles at the corner
of your small shiny black eyes.

I miss your loud and obnoxious laugh,
I miss your warm hugs.
I miss how you would laugh
At my childish jokes.
I miss your tickles when I was sad
And I miss your goodnight kisses.

I miss you
And I wish I could go back in time.
I wish I could relive all our moments together.
All those moments I failed to cherish until it was too late.
All those times you carried me on your shoulders folding my little hands into yours
All those times we danced in the middle of the kitchen to old french songs
All those times you kissed me on the forehead
And told me you loved me.
All those times I took you for granted.

I do not only mourn your loss,
I mourn all the moments we will never have together,
I mourn for my graduation without your hugs and kisses
I mourn for my wedding day without you to walk me down the aisle
I mourn for the birth of my first child without their grandpa to bless them.
I mourn for every minute this world has to exist without its kindest angel.

If only I had known that you would leave so soon
Then maybe I would have never left home
Or maybe I would have picked up the phone that day.

I miss you, papa,
More than I thought was humanly possible.

Mourn all of the buried words
You wished you said

Hearts will shiver
Souls will howl
They will mourn for the gentle eyes
That promised love

All that remains
Is a cold cellar of darkness

Not a whisper of joy
Only the echo of melancholy
A dark
And lonely grave

I fear that time closes in;
It moves faster and faster.
A broken heart, a broken mind,
My life is a disaster.

I'd hoped that time wasn't done.
There's still much for me to do,
But the night bandit creeps up on me
As I wave goodbye to you.

I wonder what it will be like,
If eternal life exists;
All these questions cloud my thoughts
Like the spring's morning mist.

It pains me so that I must go,
But I know it's out of my hands.
There's something larger than I,
And it's all according to His plan.

The light escaped barely through the cold morning.
I found you broken—and I was too,
You healed me more than I could heal you,
I wiped the tear rolling down your cheek,
Your last word escaped the brim of your lips
So weak, so fragile;
And our love grew boundless.

My soul turned a desert.
I can't grow a rose anymore.
I can't seek the red petals.
For, they have fallen for you
mourning for all the hope
that turned into nothing
but love deprived thorns.