Looking for peace under every rock I see
Looking for love in every magazine
Looking for hope in every drop of rain
Praying that You will take away my pain

keep doing things like you are now,
and I hope to see you get pushed even further down,
by the ones who are supposed to help pull you up.

I will and have always been here to help you,
              and have,
but one day that's going to stop.

and that's going to ****,
when you learn how much the world ***** first hand.
because no one holds your hand.

and life,
its not one plan,
its full of little things you eventually fall into,

but what you have fallen into,
is a sick and twisted pattern,
my old friend,

you gotta get out of this monster,
You know me,
by god,

our house,
everything's a ******* open book,
and sometimes I feel you don't even look,

but maybe your over looking,
or not looking close enough,
Because you were the one whose always had more then enough,

I don't say that to make u feel sorry for me,
but I say it so maybe you on top of everything,
Don't also have to be someone who is mean,

Having a knowledge about me,
you know how,
kids can me cruel,

and your constant put downs,
are no better then the ones I get served at school daily,
from teachers students and friends and now I guess my family,

Being told theirs nothing wrong,
like lying to me,
telling me my dreams are now a reality,

BUT THERE NOT,
because there are too many things wrong to name,
and my dream wont ever become more then a game,
because my mind is being told lies to feed my flame,

and you can call me the lier,
and call it my own game,
ad that I'm only looking to gain,

But I only want to gain,
What I've always been denied,
And that used to be the help I needed in school,

But as you said,
Like everyone else too,
I'm going no where,

So all I ask for,
Is my happiness they robbed me of,
but that's impassible to get back,

Just like love,
But I can at lest act loving,
And pretend happiness is a thing that exists for me,

because I don't know,
What else to do,
because I've missed out on so much,

and for you to tell me I'm stupid and don't know ****,
That's *******,
you don't know ****,

Our house was and always will be an open book,
my life's been discussed openly,
you know everything about me,

so I'll ask you this,
Why didn't you chose,
to look closely?

We walk in and start looking around for something we want
We wander around trying to choose the next chapter
but its hard with so many surrounding us

Then the owner comes over and shouts at you
saying, you are taking too long
everyone else has already chosen

You start getting anxious because you are searching
for what feels like forever
and still can't figure out what you want

Your rush and grab something that looks safe
Just to find out that it wasn't what you needed
It wasn't what you wanted

So you close it
put it back on the shelf
maybe to find interest in it in the future

Until then, we will just keep looking
for something that catches our eye
and inspires us to turn the page.

Our time together,
Passed far too quickly,
But in so little,
You taught me so much,
Some of it bad,
Most of it good,
You showed me,
How to be myself,
Gave me confidence,
Gave me trust,
Proved that I could care,
Proved that I could cope,
You built me up,
To a point where I could,
Lie down next to my mother,
And tell her my secrets,
Secrets I had never told,
That I thought I would never tell,
But needed to be said,
Maybe that time was clouded,
By the arguments and stubbornness,
But you were my first Valentine,
And you made me happy,
I will never forget that,
And what means the most,
Is how you put my happiness before your own,
Even after we were over.

What I'm really trying to say is this:
Thank you.