How selfish of me having someone new.
Yet some nights I sit craving you .
Selfish of me for leaving you
For the same reasons she ended up loving  about you
I hate the pain I feel from your happiness because before I knew I was in perfect bliss
How good it felt to think I was the only one who could ever love you yet I chose not too
I would keep telling myself our paths would cross again but then my new man came in
And I thought I had it all
It’s selfish that I though he would spend all his life waiting for me
And I thought leaving would make me feel free
But now I’m back to being unsure about who I’m meant to be
You are loved and now married
soon you may start creating you’re own little family
and I can’t help but think all of that should’ve been with me .
The nerve I have in me to feel entitled
The selfishness in me for loving two
For the longest time I didn’t know what to do but now your ship has sailed
And I’m hoping my new relationship doesn’t fail
And for you I hope marriage does you well

my heart’s so fragile;
i’m afraid to give it away,

all that’s left of me is
a sarcastic personality,
and even that is
starting to fade.

Leave me alone
I screamed it into the night

Leave me alone
I cried it into my pillows

Leave me alone
I begged it into the dark

Leave me alone

So they did

They left me alone

I can't close my eyes,
I can't close my mind
as my thoughts keep me awake all night.

I toss and I turn,
trying to find comfort in my bed.

It's past midnight
and my thoughts have been rung
with gasoline
and been set on fire.
It consumes the small pieces of
happiness that I picked up during the day.

I gaze and think,
as there is no save tonight.

So I lay with a heavy mind
and empty heart
waiting for my eyes to slip to sleep.