When you play the game, it’s hard to get out of the game. Time passed and this perfect love at first sight began becoming faded. In truth, I was very concealed with how I felt, he wasn’t aware of how little he gave in contrast.

One person I really adored I ended up using pretty badly and shared a romantic love for them when hopes of my relationship had died, but I didn’t feel right. Essentially, I was so torn up and emotionally confused that it was selfish of me to consider dating as a whole at this time.

I took a break.

I did want it to work with my prior partner, but I lied to people, hurt people and in the end, I felt ashamed and embarassed of what I had done to everyone involved. Mixing shame and confusion is a bad time for anyone. It’s definitely not something fun to encounter.

I luckily still have my friend with me to this day and I treasure them as a friend. I do feel lucky to have my friends from many years prior come back into my life, but sometimes, you aren’t always ‘lucky’. So treasure those around you. Don’t do what I did, it was very narcissistic. I showed so little empathy and in the end that’s what left me alone.

Since then, this event taught me to treat people with respect, to not assume people’s lives are always ‘filled with sunshine’. I learnt to care for others as well as myself.

This poem is a Tanka poem, they are a little like haikus but they have a lot more syllables. I will admit, when researching I did notice sometimes Tankas show themes of nature alongside passion, so I wanted to really tackle a mixture of both.

Tankas weren’t easy to try first-time, I did enjoy some of the metaphors I used regarding the start of the poem. Definitely something I need to practice.

I did, reference an album I like a lot on purpose, I referenced Ocean Eyes which is an Owl City album I really adore.

hm