You showed up in my dream again
Every time its like a sin
You are my whole galaxy
But her
You swallow her down like you do with gin
Still, i would take down the stars for you
When you wont even give me
a second look
I know its a toxic feeling
But along with hers

My heart you also took

Since that cold, starry night
You have been on my mind

Your deep adorable voice
Your shiny ocean eyes
Is always playing on my mind

I am falling in love
with the smile you always give me
I am falling in love
With your eyes
Always meeting mine

You're special, im not denying that
But i still cant seem to find
Why when you're near me
You always make me
loose my mind

Knotted fingers,
Lacing through my hair.

Rough hands,
Touching me gently.

Broad shoulders,
With arms that hold me.

Strong back,
That lifts me up.

Scarred body,
That has many stories to tell,

And a mean face,
From years of torment,

The body I love,
The body I know,
The body of the person who has my heart.

The boy who owned it still owns me.
The man who carries it is still the boy I'm in love with.

His body, along with his scars, are all that make him perfect.

I'm happier,
I promise.
I'm doing better,
okay?
You don't have to this,
please.
I'm sorry that I'm hurting,
and I know,
you are too.
But what I don't understand,
is what I mean to you.
You say I'm your best friend,
but you don't act like it.
That night we hung out,
you made me feel things again,
and as much as I hated that,
I loved it all the same.
I'm happier,
I promise.
Now that you're not sad,
even though,
it hurts me,
I love seeing you smile again.
I care about you,
in more ways than one.
I can't escape it,
I wish I could.
Believe me,
I wish I could.
I'm happier,
I promise.
Even though I'm lying,
I know it's what you want to hear,
so I'll just fake it.

What is happiness?
It’s different for every person, although
it may be similar for few.
But what is it exactly?
Sure, it's smiling, laughing, feeling nice,
like you want to capture the moment
and replay it forever.
Maybe your happiness is a person.
Seeing them smile, makes you smile,
hearing them laugh makes your heart
skip a beat, just taking a
glimpse at them makes your
stomach flutter with butterflies.
And their eyes? Well their eyes make
everything calm.
That is nice, but what if happiness
doesn't really exist? I mean, it's only
a combination of different chemicals
in your brain.
What if happiness is only an absence of sadness?

I believe in love in spite of it all
in the resilience of the heart
I appreciate its ability to move on
albeit shattered

I believe in fairy tales
and happily ever afters
In the magic of soulmates
As farfetched as it seems

I believe people are good
and can get lost in someone's smile
My eyes still search for the heart
that can keep time with mine

So yes I still believe
Yet I refuse to put my life on hold
whilst waiting for love
on this broken road I'm on

you didn't fall in love with me
you fell in love with me because i happened to be the only one there

why do i fall in love with people for the simplest little things?
like the way they say certain words
or that little smirk they do when they get nervous
maybe it's because it reminds me of something from my past
or someone
lately i've been trying not to think about things so hard
one night stands
the looks people give me at the mall
you
you
you.

****