There was a time in my life where I was indifferent about you. I couldn't care less about what you did and where you went. After the night I walked out of your life, I became indifferent. It wasn't easy, letting go of my feelings. It will never be easy. But the feelings coming back to my life was the easiest thing you have done. With just the snap of a finger and a text message, everything came back to me. The indifference was gone and feelings, senses came back to me. I didn't want this. My heart wasn't ready to discover territories that were hidden after I left. I shoved my feelings down my throat, just for them to come up again night after night, when I would cry myself to sleep. I never bothered to ask you how you were because I knew it would only end in us fighting. We were a ticking time bomb, ready to explode. It was just a matter of who lit the wick first.

I open my eyes to a dark room,
Yet I am engulfed more and more with each frantic blink.
My eyes should be adjusted but something isn't right this time.
His rugged hands have sewn these eyes open.

The needle passes through my skin like a knife through warmed butter
And I try to deter each swooping movement
But a strong foreign grip locks me into position;
There's not enough time in the night.

A scene replayed from long ago
Is etched into the brain that I cannot control.
It pains me to see this night return
As if fate had willed it to happen in the first place.

Memories are lost in translation
And these unnatural sensations are overpowering me.
The fingerprints trailed up and down my psyche
Until they stole my identity away.

He never paid the entrance fee
But I covered it for him, just this time.
I had no money to spare to the wickedness that greeted me,
But they said my innocence was enough.

Now I pace impatiently and grasp at false notions
That I could be revived
Or that you could tell the truth one time.
You've corrupted my entire entity and I was left to wash up the blood.

The sick part is that I love the taste too much to watch it go.
I'd rather be burned down with a thousand matches
Before I'd see her run free.
It's too sad to think about now so we better hurry.

Rush the blade across the flesh that surrounds my heart
And take it all for yourself as you did before--
As you'll do again.
It's not my cycle to break.