It let go.
I struggled out of its pale, bony fingers...
I doubted and contemplated other means of escape, but I kept fighting,
Never giving up.
***** fingernails, bitten raw,
Was what I saw when it grabbed me in the hallways many years ago.
But I never stopped trying to break free.
Never.
I scratched, kicked, and screamed!
I scratched and hit,
And the blood of the hands just poured   Down,
Down,
Down,
Red thick blood.
And it laughed. It laughed in my face.
When this happens, don’t be startled or scared. Don’t give up.
Because when it laughs, it’s in pain. And
Finally,
Finally,
Finally,
It let go.
A month ago, maybe two.
Maybe yesterday or tomorrow,..
I stopped keeping track.
But I’ve finally been able to smile
Without the sadness holding onto me.
You’ll get there too.

Of storm and chaos and desire,
The King shall be born and fed,
Destined to reveal such power,
That's known not to mortal men.

His cradle shall be a shield,
The King shall cry in it alone,
A sword his toddler hand shall wield,
Pain shall be his early throne.

His parents will be his killers,
Poison shall be mothers milk,
Gravestones will be ornate mirrors,
Thorns and iron will be silk.

He'll never know no gold nor kingdom,
He'll never know no woman's love!
His bethrothed a firey demon,
His enemy- God above!

His master shall be The Raven,
Carrying a ring of gold,
It's wings show the only way and,
Keys to the throne of old.

His servants will be all men and women,
Yet no kingdom he will rule,
His courts empty, no one in them,
He's his own squire, page and fool.

The Raven king shall spread his wings,
Yet the blind will call it war,
The storm that his crown will bring,
It brewed in the planet's core.

He'll never rest nor stop ascending,
He'll never know but grief and pain,
But he will be unrelenting,
The King of his soul and his name!

I still believe in our love
I still carry that internal knowledge
That the day you were born
My name was written on your heart

We haven't come this far
To only come this far
If the world was ending now
I would fall right back into your arms

Because you are home
You'll always be home

The time is coming, the earth soon unwiring
Fire and lightning rumbles down, down upon all the ground
The same ground that hosts the very thing killing it
It seems that the key to both greatness and terror has once again been used on not greatness
But terror
The sky flashes as all of everything you have ever loved, hated, and known, turns into ashes
Bombs rain from above as corpses fill the ground below
Yet, we still look up, at our impending doom
Just to watch one final firework

She lie  
She get by  
He’s a guy  
He’s so sly  
She got no father  
Just a fake stepfather
He got a family  
All in jail, actually  
They are meant for each other  
They’re expecting, so she’ll soon be a mother  
Their others a girl, now she’ll have a brother  
They don’t own a house, they’d rather squatter  
Thrown out again, forever living in squalor  
Not a dollar for food, now she’s a robber  
She’ll be living with in-laws soon, wearing a collar  
So yes, the little girl and me the brother  
We once called her, our dearly beloved mother.

I've been here before, but not like this.
You've brought upon feelings that I've begun to miss.
Despite the struggle with my darkness and its abyss,
You empower me to fight with my claws and intimidate with my hiss.
You fill me with tender fondness, delicate bliss,
And when I close my eyes, I dream of your sweet kiss.

I've been here before, but in a different light.
You've brought back colours in a world black and white.
Hushed exchanges in the stillness of night,
Whispering sweet nothings that fill me with delight.
My soul burns with a fire that only you can ignite,
Enveloping me in a glow that radiates immensely bright.

I've been here before, but not quite this way.
You've brought back the excitement that comes along with play.
Wolf and kitten, in a game of predator and prey,
Stern commands that we both know I won't obey.
Unless you call me those names that make my knees sway,
Oh, yes... I’m drifting... drifting away.



I’ve been here before, but I am wary.
You’ve made me feel things that are real, and it’s scary.
But I will not dig a grave for my feelings to bury,
As they are sweeter than my favourite chocolate-coated berry.
You’ve been patient and have never made me feel secondary,
Yet, I remain conflicted to this day, and it’s the 5th of fu cking January.

I’ve been here before, but not this afraid.
You’ve lured me out of my hiding spot and its comforting shade.
Your dedication is unwavering and with me it remained,
Your fascination and curiosity for me never faltered or decayed.
The darkness that found home inside of me, its bed it had laid,
Clouding me with fear and doubt that hurts more than any blade.

I've been here before, but not this conflicted.
You've got me hooked and mindlessly addicted.
My mind warns me of allowing these feelings to go unrestricted,
Knowing full well that my heart will be afflicted.
It is ready to say, "I told you so, just as I predicted!"
But.. what if it doesn't happen the way I had depicted?


I've been here before, but not this deep.
You've made me smile, but also made me weep.
I don't have the bravery needed to take the leap,
I’m afraid of heights and this cliff is just too steep.
It takes immense strength and willpower to upkeep,
That I do not yet possess, so please let me go back to sleep...

I've been here before, but there is some hope.
You've made me ponder of crazy ideas, like to escape and to elope!
But marriage? Six babies? Nope. Nope. Nope.
Please take it slow, so that I can actually cope,
As the leap I fear to take is off a dangerous *****.
But I can’t just sit around and cry and mope,
Rather find easier ways across, maybe some rope?

I've been here before, but I like you.
You've been there for me as my feelings flourished and grew.
I asked you to be patient for a year or two,
And I still need time for my courageous breakthrough.
I want to be someone you'd be proud to stand next to,
That is not me currently, it may be sad but it is true.

I’ve been here before, but never like this.
My heart longs and aches, for you I will miss.
You envelop me in adoration, I smile as I reminisce,
And hush the butterflies that soar with every kiss.
I sigh and swear there is nothing better than this,
And when I close my eyes, I dream of Paradise, our world of bliss.

At the hands of men, I learned the lessons of life.

I first learned fear with your towering figure, explosive temper, shaking hands, and abrasive voice. The older I got, the more the words cut me, a double blow of volume and weight. The tremors of my body visible for all to see, they angered you, but I could see nothing through my blurred eyes. My head spun as my lungs forgot how to breathe and I lost myself in your anger.

Another taught me vulnerability. In the shadows of your room with your girlfriend next door, I was your puppet and you my master. You tarnished me, made me unclean. You stole from me my vulnerability, killed the me that breathed easy. At your hands, I lost myself.

And then I learned pain-at the hands of a different tutor, but at this point it’s all the same. I learned pain in the comfort of my room, cloaked in that fuzzy green blanket. I learned the kind of pain that tears through the heart and childishly demands attention at every given moment; an obnoxious nagging pain with its grating voice and quick jabs in the ribs. I learned the pain of regret, of indecision, of betrayal. Tears marked the torment of my mind, songs didn’t hit me the same. My heart was an open wound at the mercy of the elements around. I sought healing and peace, wound stitched closed, but such things leave scars. I still remember that lesson well, in your warmth and in your piercing blue eyes, I learned pain of the truest kind.

At the hands of men, I learned the lessons of life. But in my hands, that life blooms.

You feel you are a stack of mortar and brick
I see you as a sailing ship
So funny how these things contradict
You think you’re still, I say you’re still moving

Shift with me, but standing against the waves
You’re not one for the newest craze
Traditional as you innovate
You and your wonderful “you-ness”

See each time you rise and fall
Ship to sea, not stagnant wall
Consistently moving, never to be stalled
Till your destination is reached

And until you sail again