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  Sep 12 Hortência Granair
You messaged me today
I listened to what you had to say
My heart didn't hurt
You didn't try to flirt
You apologized to me
And said you'd like to see...
You'd like to see me and catch up
I said okay
I could talk to you today
Is this healing
Because I have no feeling
I have no feelings left for you
don’t blame me, it’s not my fault.
you’re afraid of the decisions you have to make.
you’re obsessed with what isn’t yours to take.
you’re tired of the confidence you have to fake.
you’re ashamed of the way that you break.
stand in your place, and don’t blame.
and the coward points their rot finger at someone else, hoping that this will make them braver. but blaming doesn’t purify, it keeps rotting them from inside
the anguish
that never leaves my heart

bites my nails
and pulls my hair out

this anguish
one day might **** me

but maybe
just maybe

it already did it
I’m truly anguished, I have so many feelings, so many thoughts in my head rn but I can’t barely write, only short pieces :( not despising short poems but I feel I could write so much more
I’m afraid of heights
not because I fear falling
but because I fear jumping.
from the day I was born
I wasn’t meant to belong to myself
a cursed being without any power of control

my fate was written
in a lazy handwriting
on a wrinkled piece of paper

very early in life I learned so
that I had strings tied to my limbs
and I would never be able to walk alone

any glance of freedom
where I dared to dream
was followed by a unwanted label

i’ve always been
someone’s sister
someone’s youngest child
someone’s crush
someone’s heartbreak
but never
in the purest
the freest
I often lose myself because of other’s expectations and labels
  Apr 23 Hortência Granair
If there comes a time
that you might lose me
Find me in my poetry
everytime I hate myself and wish to be other people,
I lose myself
little by
when a God complex doesn't kick in (most of the time) I just can't see value in myself
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