no matter the distance
or all the missed phonecalls
and unread texts
in a way
a small piece of my heart
will always belong
to you
my first love
and first heartbreak.

Esther L. Krenzin

I knew love when I was 16
It was something new to me
An unfamiliar rhythm that I try to dance to
I tried hard to make it fit on me
But I always miss the beat of it

Love is like a familiar stranger
Or a scenario of deja vu
I somehow knew it but barely recognizes it
It's a lesson that I have learned that I forgot
Although I am willing to relearn it

Love was always with me
Like a secretly supportive friend
That knows my demons even if I am a closed book
Always gives me an invisible pat on my shoulder
Pushes me through the hardest obstacles

Love became a dear friend
That I would share a kidney to
It became my something spectacular
A burst of vivid fireworks in the night sky
It made me stare at it in awe

Love is something I can't afford to lose
Because in all honesty, I have grown fond of it
Losing love means I'll get to start over again
I don't have the heart to face the beginning
If it is not with the same love

Love is my reason to lie to my mother
It made me want to sneak out on friday nights
Just to have long midnight walks
While holding their precious hand
As the cool wind kisses our cheeks

Love reached all my standards
Yet at the same time, erased it
I learned to love the flaws and imperfections
Love became the high standard
That no one could reach

Love is my beginning and end
Love is both my fear and courage
Love is my peace and chaos
Love is my in between
Love is you.

I wrote a poem long ago
As an assignment for class
It was the first I was proud of
That feeling didn't last
It captured something
That rarely I'd place
An ever-present
Mask on my face
It was written there
Now lost forever
A truth I knew
Would bring me no pleasure
Titled "Masquerade"
I thought that was clever
Even used three words
To put rhyme to those letters
It was whole and it was tragic
Though I wrote it stone-faced
Turned it in, to the teacher
With no smile or grace
That page was Rumplestiltskin
Its lines gave form
To thoughts never shared
Within my brain's storm
The poem was an answer
From the hand that wrote it
To a baffled 12-year-old
Who couldn't control it
She gave it back to me
Along with an A
That I stuffed in my pack
And lost the same day

Our first kiss, lips pressed--
Electricity to stone--
A new age to bloom.

It felt like a film

Those rose tinted days in the city
the rush at Liverpool Street
running late on my twenty first birthday
waiting on the circle line
in the cold winter sunshine
I remember coffee in the tiny cafe
when everyone turned to look at us laugh

It felt as if the world made sense
as if we’d found the place we needed to be
tucked away in a corner sharing stories
as if we’d known each other forever
like soul mates made of the same star
I knew I never wanted to leave your side

My first true love...
We met through lies
I went on a date,
To my very own surprise

My first true love
We had flirted times before
Nothing serious
Of that I thought I was sure

My first true love
Didnt occupy a thought in my mind
For I didnt see
He was exactly my kind

My first true love
Helped the real me outside
And loved me forever
Even as the fake me died

First Boat


first boat off the island @ 5:40 am,
the sun, savvy and knowledgeable
makes sunrise @ 5:14 am for ‘late’ is
not an adjective extant in its stellar lexicon

a safety check, sunlight invades every crack,
pilings vested & secured, ferry engine hums a
warming, morning cranking tune, a sailors
favorite from the global ******’s hymnal

those early morning voyagers, who are exchanging,
one island for another, note their coffee steaming up
coordinates with haze, burning off, all to see the first
waves come to rock them voyagers to “all awaken”

sunlight then slow spreads its envision, from the Heights
over to Mashomack, rousing, disturbing, nudging the
remaining, for there is work, living aplenty, we who stay
to tend to the most appropriately named isle in the world

6/12/21
Silver Beach
Shelter Island, New York