My plan was to enter the new year without you in it.

To let midnight's fireworks be a mark of leaving 2018 and you behind.

I can't.

It's still you.

I'll take the risk of bringing you with me to next year.

As my grey area.

I'll leave our fate in the hands of 2019.

Do you remember how we used to do this?
Sit on the hood of your truck
and eat salted fries.
We'd both have stupid grins on our faces
and I'd tell you how good you looked.

Do you remember how the sky lit up?
The fireworks were so loud
but I could almost hear the boom
in your heart
after each explosion.

Do you remember when you laid
your head on my shoulder?
and I tried to hold your hand,
You pulled away saying
you needed a smoke.
But I know you hate the taste...

I remember how cold it was,
the night after you slept in my bed.
You had worn my old shirt,
and I almost told you.

A couple days later is all it took though,
for me to say the words
I know you didn't want to hear.
And I haven't heard from you since.

So now I'm sitting alone.
Watching each blast,
Counting all the colours,
trying to forget your smile.

There are moments
so beautiful
that before it begin
it has to end.
Like our love
a firework lit
it started to die,
as it started to live.

Even though
      It's been years,
Whenever I see fireworks
     I think of you.