Thank you for trying to help me cope.
Thank you for trying to offer me hope.

But this wound goes deeper than the soul.
It's the way the world is broken as a whole.

You'll never know the crush to a little girl's heart;
The shock and fear and disgust that starts

When she learns how men will see her,
How they'll fantasize on how to use her.

When she learns her power is minimal
And she's at the mercy of men who are criminals,

That being in this body makes her a target,
And her worth is decided in the beauty market.

Every part of her free game to criticize,
And valued only as she's seen by men's eyes.

So forgive me if I have trouble believing
That the world is better than I am perceiving.

But my life is the proof that what I'm saying is true.
Be thankful you can't understand all I've been through.

I speak with a wavering tongue of abandonment
Unsure to explore the Old Story in a distant time
The dowager and the maiden forced to defend
An unexplored narrative that supersedes Her Crime
But the call is impossible to resist
Most especially a female’s debut is not of her age
Rather an unfortunate event where he exists
To inflict the indomitable damage

For in the beginning, desecration is a promise
On womanhood that prevails
Lingering from a girl’s memory crevice
There is an incomplete circle with raggedy details
So it is the phenomenon she continuously bleeds
Through the vagueness of a shapeshift letters
Her growling mind where the prophecy feeds
The neurotic critters

Bruises from the Elder Man turns into hollowed scar
The autopsy did not identify a blunt trauma
Only the stolen lullabies and constellation chart
Excreting from his mouth is a monochromatic drama
Challenging suffering with evil like a reverse lobotomy
No emotional endurance can express her distress
Over the gap between their ages as the legacy
And so shall the judge orders his arrest

The second Prince is enamored at first sight
He prays to the gods for their union fate
Until the war triggers her to fight
Her sins and rumors tainted it too late
Choice has been made to bare her skin
At first, she thought it’s empowering
Until it pulverizes her patience to thin
Being radical as her sweetest ending

The Rising Sun aligns with the beguiling lady
She howled at the future of his departure
But nothing hurts like a shadow of the first Macy
She tries to separate her identity as her adventure
So she can be chosen and different from her twin
In no connection to blood, only the lover
The world is crushed when the others win
Comparison between Macy and lady will not recover

Stability comes from the face of discipline
An offer of love has set the story into motion
But she lashes out against his morphine
Evident as her cruelty remains his devotion
Two years of an unrivaled reign
It must be finished
The anticipative break is present without pain
I spared his soul before it diminished

Tell me now, man of the universe!
Owner of all aspects and humanity
I was not born to accept your objective curse
My sisters aspire to rise and maintain equality
Except I see a dysfunction to the standard
I spit at the thought of Him by my side
Apocalyptic approach on this regard
Declaration of freedom will abide

Nonsensical apocalypse of her birth
Doomed by ***, astoundingly rebellious
It is I, a woman, who understands the earth
My nature is exquisite in spontaneous
Root of all evil, I shall not meet with forgiveness
I associate this Seed of Mankind
Let us dim its imaginary limitless
Upholding such values should be left behind

A cry from a newborn arises
Phallus is connected to the subject
The mother knew his fate on crisis
His crimes will be stamped with neglect
Finally, a girl is not caressed in regret
For it is punishment to be born like him
His paranoia, a symptom of being possessed
It is no longer a she that will end in a grim

I’m a man,
and so I can.

I can walk alone at night,
for only cowards get a fright.
I can post my real last name.
This life for me is just a game.
I can look them in the eye
(as long as I don’t start to cry).
I can curse and yell and shout.
That is what I’m all about.
Assertive is the way to be.
I'm the boss. Now can't you see?

I can dress how I would like.
I can ride a reg’lar bike.  
I can bend or squat or sit
with legs spread wide. I am the ****.
My gender, I don’t qualify.
Default is he, and so am I.  

And when I spit, I draw no looks.
My undergarments have no hooks.
My hair just sits as it was made,
distinguished as it starts to fade.
I can slap my gut with pride.
She said me too, but that ***** lied.
My pain is real; my anger, too.
And I don't have to use the loo.

Dear daughter, won’t you try to be  
a big strong man as safe as me?

They'll call her ruin.
They'll call her shame.

They'll never call her,
by her name.

Once the deed is done.
Her world it shakes.

As all her secrets.
Are laid out bare.

There is no hiding.
This ruined girl.

They'd call her pretty.
They'd call her smart.
They'd call her art.

Till she fell in love
Then fell apart.

The man he ran.
Like most men do.

Escaping the wreckage.
Of his youth.

The ruined girl,
was left alone.

Becoming a cautionary tale.
Of women's woes.

Whispering through history.
"Be careful with whom you love."

Athena turned ’round her head
like a night owl on the sly
and looked up behind her
as gold Apollo crossed the sky,

riding with his four coursers’
flying gilded manes and hooves.
Their silver flanks and quarters
thunder across the earth’s blue roof.

The rhythm of their beat
stamps a lyric all their own,
blood coursing with the heat
of the sun-disk they all towed.

The she-god of the wise
observes this cloud-streaked scene,
the man-god shining out,
casting shadows ’round Athene.

Apollo’s path is sinking low
as the winter months advance.
The frost now blurs his glow
and bare forests fall into trance.

It’s in this creeping night
that Athena finds her time.
She draws her wisdom in twilight,
no need for blinding light up high.

For she shines not with a sun.
Instead she lights her own pathway.
By her craft and wits she’ll run
her own trail she blazed today.

i wasn't born hungry, i remember how it happened.
a bad man put a hole in me, one day when i was
very young
and i've been eating ever since:
i love gluttony, hate, ****, burning buildings, and you.

i'm sorry, it's not my fault. i was born hungry,
like strange flowers bloom:

both too old and too soon.

dance to the song,
you beautiful ballerina
we are all watching
don't mess up

move your feet,
you beautiful ballerina
or we will attach the strings
to your useless little limbs... again

paint a smile on your face,
you ugly ballerina
if you smiled more
more people will like you

why did you eat that,
you fat ballerina?
you'll just gain more weight
you wont fit into your size -5 dress

you made a mistake,
you useless ballerina
maybe you should just go
nobody even wants to see your show.

Quit hoping for freedom,
You disaster of a ballerina
You are our marionette
We have full control

Stop lying,
You rat of a ballerina
We have never hurt you
We just discipline

Stop being dramatic,
You drama queen of a ballerina
You dance
You don't act

Stop moping,
You hideous ballerina
Just because he doesnt like you anymore
Doesnt mean you have a right to frown

Start smiling,
You sad ballerina
Nobody will like you
If you frown...

you deserve better,
you precious, imperfect, kind, sweet, beautiful, nice, wonderful, friendly, injured, hopeful ballerina.
leave this awful place.
you deserve so much better...