A little star that shines its flare so bright
My eyes do falter o'er the sapphire peaks
I wonder could it be a satellite
My heart so swells as I release a shriek

A midnight sun's rays dance with my descent
Down jacket shields me, all except my eyes
Even the mood abases his crescent
Façade of white now veils the evening sky

Oasis filled with melted water drip
Reality of water levels low
The buckets filled, I just try not to trip
Hallo to all the beauty down below

I hope that you can get a sense of life
So far away from all your daily strife

I am but a thousand words
A million melodies flowing freely
A spider web of emotions
A spiral highway of thoughts

I think of dying a lot.
Almost every day it seems.
My mind is consumed by the thought that,
Possibly,
one day,
I will simply cease to exist.
My brain doesn't understand,
it cannot comprehend,
the brevity of these thoughts.
Not existing isn't an option, it goes against human instinct.

A part of me hopes there is life after death,
That with all the possible universes and timelines,
We can simply switch from this one to the next.

The anxious part of me,
the largest parts of me,
panic at the idea of having no air or sun or life.
Nothing, not even awareness of the absence of something.

As empty as I am, or have been,
I still fight.
I fight to stay alive and to experience all of the wonderful moments that exist in this life.
I want to travel to unknown Italian islands and see the way the sun sets in Thailand.

Why am I stuck in this bubble, this little corner of Earth, when there is so much more to explore?

I am afraid of dying, without ever having the opportunity to live.

Almost abstractly it begins
Offerings of aphorisms to quell the daily tide
Exploring all angles available and their attributes
Adjust then all aspects of our problems
And build towards an anticipated resolution
A path that addresses those actions
But abandons the essence
Trophies acquired arbitrarily
Diminishing the attribution of success
Assistance pursued to remedy adversity
Renders academic the activities
That were pursued originally
Until all is abstract, ambiguous, abstruse

Part 1: DESOLATE SPACES STILL
Depth of the gray evening
Envelops the lone wolf child who wanders through it
Slowly making her way up the river, careful of the damp moss on the cobblestone path
Only looking up from the ground to gaze upon the stars
Looking to the constellations for guidance, unafraid of what surrounds her
All she really knows is the cold and the dark and the stars
Tips fading as they emanate from the center point
Even as dreams fade with outward pushes, the stars fade as the light moves. And she moves.
She has class at 7:30 the next morning
Paling in importance as it looms closer, its pressure now mere hours from her shoulders
Ants crawling across the sea and she’s had her fill of  the meaningless chaos
Chaos. From ordered civilization emerges organized institution, but those incarcerated can’t be tamed
Even zombies without worth run wild within the stone walls
So when another stretch looms before the lone wolf as she breathes in freedom, she can’t care.
Slipping through her mind is only one reason to submit. She whispers his name in her mind.
Tall, handsome, sweet, and funny… just her type and he’s right within reach…
If she submits and lets herself try
Loud hints in the soft and subtle moments make her feel like submission is worth it
Left to her own devices, she’d wander forever. But now she’ll have to make her way to class.

Part 2: Great Lakes
I entered into a staring contest with the nerd from English class
It was a deep dive exploration of the Great Lakes
Two great crystallized depths locked on me
They mirrored each other brimming with emotion
They were a river and torch to baptize me by fire
But it was just a staring contest
And afterwards she turned right back to her notebook
Completely unaware she’d left my soul spinning
Which leaves me terrified of how effortlessly enthralling she is
That her eyes have such power… and she doesn’t even seem to know.