My heart is broken,
And gushing out,
But don't you worry.
For I wear a dark crimson shirt,
So I don't offend anyone,
With the blood stains.

I...I love him... He doesn't love me. I am a pawn, in this chess game of love and  he is the player, he decides my fate,  he chooses what I do. He can make me skip school, have *** with him, and if he leaves me and never talks to me...I wouldn't want to take a shower because i would be afraid his scent would wash away from me, I'd stay up all night thinking and remembering the way he would breath, how he would laugh and his smile. I would crave his touch and I wouldn't go to school. He controls me. And I don't know if I want to be controlled. I'm so terrified that tomorrow he will choose that he no longer needs me and I'm terrified he will leave me.

Your strokes they were just so truthless
Your colours they made me ruthless
Made me stand and stare at my reflection
You told me my eyes were just perfection
You let me finish dreaming
But it turns I was hopeless
You painted my picture
Never let me see the truth
Of what canvas holds
And when you hung it up in my heart
I never felt so cheated
Those eyes you tried to perfect
They weren't  mine
Those lips, rose and red
They never lived
Your black frame lied like like a raven
Showed me a picture I never was in

You almost killed yourself tonight.







I'm so glad you didn't

I lay awake at night, every night,
trying to wrap my head around
how such beautiful eyes could look at me,
and see nothing but a miserable, hopeless girl
and how your hands, suitable for nothing less than an artist,
could leave scars on my body, without even touching it
and worst of all, I can't slip the thought
that you broke my heart

How lucky.
A friend you're comfortable with
Where talking is not a necessity
But stays by your side and in need
Giving you warmth and security.

How sly.
Enjoying and loving the company
So much, that losing it hurts
Until one confessed, so canny
So unfair, at first it was nerts.

How uneasy.
Like nothing happened, nothing heard
Guilt and depression never left
Selfishness, insensitivity increased a third
But for all's sake, it was all kept.

How selfish
Liked you, missed you. Indeed selfish
Wanted to try and see what will happen
But will it not break us? it just became a wish
Guess, it might be the best then.

How to say goodbye
I say goodbye. Your romances will be missed,
Sweet talks and how we used to be
It will be awkward, we might get ****** but,
We're originally friends, remember?

I have scars and bruises
in places where you'd have to
know me better to notice them.

                      On the corners of my heart,
                             in the ridges of my body,
                                   fuelled by my dark thoughts,
                                          engulfed deep into my soul,
                                    
                            
                                          they are all here.

They are very different,
as you might see,
because all of them are really
close to who i am;
every atoms of me,
and
                            every time I love too deeply,
                             or care too much,
                              too clingy, you know,
                               they re-bruise
                               and re-open.
                                  
Some people just know why
i always have so much armours in me
and dress up in colours
                        to bandage them up,
                                                
            ­                                                       and it terrifies me
                                           no matter how much i told them,
                                                                           they are just
                                                         passing   by.