I wish I could call you my happiness
I wish I could say you're my joy
I wish when people asked for my weakness
I'd say "that's the boy"
The love of my life
My sun, my moon, my stars and my sky
My universe surrounding and always expanding
My home, my safety, my sunshine
My everything.
My heart, my strength
Now, forever, always.
I don't understand
I can't understand
What do you think they were???
What do you think you were???
Just some words I thought fit nice together
Or some exaggeration I couldn't possibly mean
Empty sentiments
Empty words
Like the empty person who writes them
I'm disappointed in you.
I'm hurt but I'm oh so disappointed
The washed up poet?
You lit a flame and brought light back into her heart
And with the new found warmth, she wrote.
She wrote at 2AM and at 4
She wrote when she was with you and when she was not
She wrote about love because that's what she felt
That's how much she felt it
How much she felt about you
And then you tell her it isn't true
You're not the love of her life just the best love she knew
How dare you?
How dare you turn all the beautiful things I said about you and meant it into empty sentiments?
How dare you turn my hard work to make you know I love you into just words?
How dare you???
How dare you tell me this???
How dare you.
How dare you make all of it so irrelevant
You've done some **** things
But this?
This one stings.

You see much more than a human,
You see their soul,
Your heart intertwined for them,

He protected me from the world,
Apart from it all,
I prayed for him,
I prayed for his success,
I prayed for his safety,
And above it all I prayed for his happiness even if he wasn't written for me,

Written for me? Yes written for me,
I mean the one we are destined to be with,
I mean the one who is my soul mate,
I mean the one that with be my forever and always,

But he,
Might not be my future,
He may not be the one for me,
He may not hold the key,

But if he is-
Protect him for me,
Because he is enchanted love,
He makes my heart sing,
The light he brings,
Into a room,
It's everlasting.... it's everlasting

i can feel you letting go.
i can feel your tight grip around my hand loosening.
i'm afraid of how cold my palms will be when you let go.
i'm afraid of not feeling your soft skin against mine.
i'm in so much pain watching you walk away.
i'm in so much pain watching you lose interest.
when you were gone, we both learned to be independent.
when you were gone, i finally managed to restrict myself from missing you.
when you were gone, i think you finally managed to do the same.
when you came back, i think i was okay without you. until you told me that the only thing you were certain about was me.
when you came back, i think you realized you don't need me anymore. that it's easier without me.
if that's the case, i hope you'll just tell me.
if that's the case, i hope you'll help me get over you.

Dear Love,

Engulfed within the darkness of the night, I'm writing this to you in hopes that I'd convey at least a bit of my utmost sincere gratitude to you for being so kindly decided to be around. Let me kneel before you and humble myself in front of you, for you're the only one who could and would embrace me wholly and completely. I can assure you that I don't have any other needs nor motives behind me asking for your constant presence other than the desire to love you wholly and completely in return. Allow me then to submit myself to you as whole, for you're the only one who could and would take me as it is; unpolished, raw, untouched.

Longing for you badly,
Detha

god, i can't stop thinking about how it feels to be in your arms.
your big bear hugs. where your muscly arms wrap around my ribs. and my cheek rests against your chest. i'm so small, wrapped up in you. when you hold me it feels like a golden fire crackling.
like the warm buzzing in your chest after taking a  shot of spiced ***.
like rolling yourself up in a blanket and dozing off.
like the smell of rain.
like when the sun is at the edge of the horizon and bleeds fuchsia.
like the sound of fireworks popping in the black sky.
like the feeling of warm sand in between your toes.
like safety.
i wish i could stop craving that comfort.

"one day i'm going to break down those walls of yours"
that used to sound comforting. that you would save me from myself. allow me to be vulnerable and be safe.
but now that sounds like a threat. you're going to crack me and watch me crumble. you'll pull out my guts and hold them in your hands. you'll have power over me now, and i'll be vulnerable. you know i'm scared of that.

i'm mad at you.
because you vanished for five days.
you didn't apologize.
and you told me you knew that i would worry. that i would act out because of it.
if you care so much for your angel, why'd you torture her like that?
you've got this evil habit of leaving me on a cliffhanger. leaving me and making me scared.
you left me wondering,
"did he **** himself?"
"did he try and end up in the hospital?"
"did he get arrested for fighting again?"
"did he and his father argue?"
"did he get sick of me and decide to leave me behind?"
and eventually what made the most sense was that you'd get bored of me and that's why you would've vanished.
but you reappeared this morning. no apology. i had to ask for you to explain. you never told me you were sorry for scaring your angel. never reassured me.
yet again, i'm trying to make things work. giving you another chance to redeem yourself. i know it's hard for you. but it's not fair for you to scare me.

We talk with certainty like
the sun rising every morning
And we look to the stars
to guide us
and to match us
We trust the beings we know nothing about
But we lock our doors at night
And it's okay;
It's a habit to leave during sunset
I don't wonder anymore
Just listen to what Orion has to say