little dark girl with
kind eyes
when it comes time to
use the knife
I won't flinch and
i won't blame
you,
as I drive along the shore alone
as the palms wave,
the ugly heavy palms,
as the living does not arrive
as the dead do not leave,
i won't blame you,
instead
i will remember the kisses
our lips raw with love
and how you gave me
everything you had
and how I
offered you what was left of
me,
and I will remember your small room
the feel of you
the light in the window
your records
your books
our morning coffee
our noons our nights
our bodies spilled together
sleeping
the tiny flowing currents
immediate and forever
your leg my leg
your arm my arm
your smile and the warmth
of you
who made me laugh
again.
little dark girl with kind eyes
you have no
knife. the knife is
mine and i won't use it
yet.

I want to remember your laugh
And the way you look when you walk away
I want to turn back the hands of time
In hopes that you choose to stay
I want to know how you're feeling
But I know that's not fair
I want you to hold my hand
Although I shouldn't care
I want you to see the clouds
The way I see them
But I know this can't be so
For I'm the flower, you're the stem

I gave so much
at the expense of my own tarnished soul
and now you hate me,
why?
because I couldn't do it anymore?
or
because so quickly I was gone?
on an entirely different road
from what I once struggled along
I couldn't do that anymore
I needed to go
to get out
to be free
Whats wrong with you?
Did I not sacrifice enough of me
to meet your expectations?
would you rather I died?
Became a roadkill?
because that's where I was headed.

Can we start over?
Can we be strangers again?
Let me introduce myself
We can laugh and talk
And relearn what we already know
And come up with new inside jokes
And create new memories
And give each other
A second chance.

Authenticity
is so overlooked
Honesty aswell
but people wouldn't notice them
even if they fell
right in their arms.

People chase a stupid fantasy
dive into a virtual world
and drown in imaginary expectations
I hope your bubble pops
life is here in front of you
I've been there too
I understand, but it's no excuse.

No one is perfect
no one really has tact
sense, perception
Or any idea how to deal with life
It's all an act.
It's all an act.

the words you said to me are engraved on my arms
carved the words
into my skin
your judgement is my cold, sweet breakfast.

i thought you were different
when you didn’t leave any scars

but instead,
you opened up the old ones
and thought i wouldn’t notice

until i found myself lying on the floor,
wondering why i was bleeding again

She sat in that chair by the window,
Watching as life went by.
Hoping to receive the letter,
The letter that never arrived.

She sat in that chair by the window,
Listening to the sounds of life.
Clutching to the hope of the letter,
The letter that never arrived.

She sat in the chair by the window,
With the light fading from her eyes.
She never gave up the hope of the letter,
The letter that never arrived.

As I sat in that chair by the window,
With a tear running from my eye.
I wished I had sent that letter,
The letter that never arrived.