"Forever" you said.
I never thought you meant
That I would remember you forever,
*Alone.

For you, I ran
I jumped, I leaped
Over all my fears.

For you, I coloured
My grey sky,
Red-
For you, I laughed, I cried,
I feared.

I feared the loss of all we had,
Although no loss was near.
I held you tight and then-
Held you tighter.
Our future still unclear.

For you, I fought
I lost, I gained.
I challenged my very self.

For you....

(that's all.)

it was all for you
And now...

      I'm by myself.

Life is a maze
and some will
always get lost....

Open.

Close.*                  
  
Open.

Close.

        ­             the doors of chance.
                           *anything goes.

Lost the key

I dance in desperate movements,
stepping on toes as I go
Spinning out of control as faces grimace in my wake,
changing scenery like mirrored ball illusions,
tiny reflective squares blinding as they move
Still you stare, questioning gazes,
not making eye contact
but sensing my heart through the song…
playing in steady repetition

Fingers in your ears for fear
that it might touch you
in rhythmic hypnosis, shining pendulums
swinging in reverse tempo, challenging these feelings
you hold but still can not admit the lyrics
Prideful walls of bricked fortitude
built around your emotions sing of
locked entryways and barred windows
and it seems I have lost the key

Misplaced along out of tune wavelengths
while pitchy corridors of doubt
fill in the shadows of this that I desire
Still I extend a hand, “would you care to dance?”
Dark eyes squint as you focus, looking beyond the bandstand,
finding mistakes of the past playing in three quarter time,
heading towards the stage door exit,
tapping your toe in cadence with the drummer
who now stops…along with the beat of my heart