“You’re a terrible person”
No I’m not
“ You’re so stupid”
Stop it
“ Nobody likes you”
But... they do
“Why would they want something broken?”
I..am..not..broken
“He’s too good for you”
Tell me something I don’t know
“You’re not supposed to hear us sweetie, you’re crazy”
...........
“Exactly, just end it now, end it all”
“Stab us out of your head”
“Watch us pour out of your wrists”
“Jump off the ledge, silence us”
“Choke us out, grip your throat and squuueeeezzzee”
“End it, you have nothing to live for”
Well it’s just another day to having to listen to you guys and I am stronger than you think.

He smiled at me and said 'here, take this'

It was a happy little pill of his and it would feel bliss

I smiled and gave him a kiss saying, 'thank you baby'

But what happened next forever will drive me crazy

Next thing you know I was spinning in my head

Then he wanted to bring me to a bed

His friends walked in and wanted more

So they all called me a ‘***** little *****’

My body was numb and I couldn’t move

I let out a scream but they didn’t approve

Everything went black but then again I woke

But to them it was nothing but a funny little joke

They locked me inside of a walk in closet

So if there was a stir I sure wouldn’t cause it

I blacked out again and woke in a different place

Treating me as if my soul were missing and my body were a case

Still I was unable to move nor speak

But he still said he loved me and kissed me on the cheek

I counted five inhumane beings on top of me moaning

One was even playfully groaning

I was disgusted and wanted it to end

But I knew that after this my mind would never mend

By now it would have been a little past three in the morning

Earlier I should have taken that adorable face as a warning

When they realized I was sobering up

They had an alibi saying they’d call this a hookup

When I could finally move my mouth again

I realized what had happened and felt heavy chest pain

They heard that I was muttering words that were incomprehensible

They saw me as nothing more than a body and that I was dispensable

They came up with a plan to hide my body in a ditch

I even heard one say, 'she deserved it, what a stupid *****'

I hit my head when they threw me on the ground

I only saw black in front of me and around

I woke up to a woman asking if I were okay

I only said one phrase and it was that 'I was betrayed'

What happened after that is irrelevant at best

All I will say is that I was nothing but stressed

This is my story and it happened two years ago today

Nailing an image in my mind that I was a targeted prey

I know now that I hold so much more worth

And I love myself more than anything on this Earth

Just know that these words have come straight from my heart

No matter how vile and disgusting this memory is, I can never restart

So I tried to make it a poem so it seems like some kind of art.

h.m.w

if a poet falls in love with you,
you can never truly die.
your lips would be spilled out,
along with perfect puckered lies.
there's always something to love,
even as you sleep in a bed deep underground.
everyone will know what you were made of,
even if you're nowhere to be found.
you are the living breathing poem that all poets need to thrive,
so if a poet happens to fall for you,
you can never truly die.

Left me, why?
Your love was a lie
From a distance
You waved me, a goodbye

You said sorry
Making another story
Smiling venomously
Said not to worry

This was the other day
When you came to say,
That you got a job
And you are going away

I would have forgiven you
If you were honest with me
But you changed my view
To see the ongoing reality

I am upset, I did cry
I am shattered and you know why
But I am not going to try
To get you back

You left me, I understand
And since you've moved on
I'll put my feelings to the end
And let my broken heart mend

I hope you don't cheat again
With whom your life has just begun
My life, consumed in unthinkable pain
The ink of my pen, now a pointless gun...*


©sim