Pink lip-stick on the **** of a cigarette,
You breathe me in and I can't forget.
You taste like ecstasy but feel like regret,
And love should never feel like a constant threat.

don't tell her that I still write about her.
don't tell her that every chance I get, I steal a moment or two to think about her.
don't tell her that I miss the sound of her voice, the scent of her hair, and the way her fingers intertwined with mines.
don't tell her that I still think about the day our lips met for the first time,
and the way her eyes held my heart.
don't tell her that I miss her and the way her beauty marks sit perfectly on her cheeks.


I promised her I'd be strong.
but let me just have this one night.

November 28, I met this girl.
She was broken. From the bullies that struck her with their words.

We got to know eachother. I got to know her favorite color, favorite food, favorite song.

Through out the the weeks we talked, I found out how truly broken she was. How words cut like knife, how she had demons inside of her.

I also realized that I was falling for her. I was falling for a broken girl. When I myself was a broken girl.

I fought with my feelings.
I couldn't be. I wouldn't be... Gay.

I found out she liked me too.

It drove me insane. Me liking a girl? Wanting to be with a girl? It was absurd. My mom would never approve.

Months later.
We're 5 months. 5 months of her being mines, and me being hers. 5 months of tears. 5 months of laughs. 5 months of love. 5 months of hate. 5 months of two broken girls trying to fix eachother.

Can we succeed or will more months pass as the little happiness we have left disappear. And our demons strengthen.

I met this girl. She changed everything.

I can't believe how amazing you are. You're the only person who's made me feel this special in a long time [delete]

are you sure you just want to be 'friends', I think I'm in love with you [delete]

can I have a goodbye kiss? I love your kisses, they taste like summer [delete]

I wish you would just say "Hi" to me in the hallways [delete]

that girl you always walk with is beautiful, I can understand why you didn't want me [delete]

when you told me I was beautiful and **** and all you would ever want, was that all a lie too? [delete]

I got a mosquito bite today and it reminded me of when we slept outside and were attacked by them [delete]

it smells like the nights we spent together [delete]

one, two, three...I've lost count of how many drinks are for you [delete]

I wish you thought about me as much as I think of you [delete]

why are your words stuck in my head [delete]

I was naive and young, I'm sorry I actually thought you loved me [delete]

it's been months since the summer nights we spent together. please tell me you miss me. [delete]

my chest hurts. my heart aches. everything about you from the way your lips tasted to how I got chills down my spine from just one touch makes me want to explode [delete]

the blood running down my wrist contains the words you said but never meant [delete]