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Gabriel Girault Dec 2020
Picture this,
It’s April, the world is moving forward as you are inside a coffee shop.
You went to be at peace, your home has felt like an enclosure.
Although it is most definitely your home there seems to be something always missing.
So you head to your second home, a coffee shop a few blocks away.
They all know you by name, and the inside jokes you all have fills the store with a warm laughter that can be felt even before anyone opens the door.
You have your bag, within it is two notebooks and a laptop. One notebook for any ideas you want to write down, and the other just in case. You have your laptop, because you said you will write on it, but you end up looking up random thoughts in your head.
You seem to not be able to focus, but that’s fine because you’re having better thoughts then when you were at home.
You spend a few hours there before you pack your bag, you get up, say your goodbyes, you look outside, the rain is pouring.
You remember you didn’t bring a coat, you couldn’t wait to leave the obstacle you call home that you never looked outside at the clouds that loomed overhead.
But in your defense you felt that same feeling for weeks now, the way those dark clouds in the sky look is how you’ve felt for most of your life now.
But as you’re walking out of this coffeeshop, someone stops you and asks why you didn’t bring a coat.
Without thinking nor without a hesitation you say, “I’m wearing one can’t you see.”, and before they can say anything else, “I wear my heart not on my sleeve, I wear it as a coat.”.
They look at you and say, “Hopefully next month I will grow from the concrete”.
  Nov 2020 Gabriel Girault
UA Slam
Hot, the feeling on my lips as I close my eyes and think.
I take a deep breath in and exhale as my mind wanders into another world.
I’m always deep in thought, because why would I stay here when the world only takes from me.
I remember all the good times we had, our hands locked as if we were scared that letting go meant the other would float off into the distance.
But once the flame ignited you seemed to forget all about your worries, forget about your past, your future, your present.
The hand loosened and soon I was forgotten about.
You were my only connection to a beat that kept me going, the pulse that let others know I wasn’t a husk of ideas that seemed to be greater than the sum of my own parts.
My rock and soul.
But I learned in high school that once a rock starts moving away from you, it will never come back, it will only ever keep moving.
And I remembered too late, just like that the case had been made and put away. Forgotten about like it never actually ever meant anything.
Heavy, the feeling of my heart as I open my eyes and cry.
I poured myself some hot tea and thought about how that was my life.
A revolving door of those who take and leave, as I stay and get hurt.
Jasmine and Mary they always seemed like a great couple, but once you looked deep inside they were only hurting each other.
One burning too hot and the other just not. One soothed the pain and the other removed it.  
Don’t mix your tea with your ***, unless you want to slowly watch it all drift away.
~ Gabriel G
Gabriel Girault Nov 2020
To the next girl I will Love.
I’m so sorry you have to deal with the mess that is me.
I don’t know how you got stuck in this position, but you must have the biggest heart.
I bet you have a way you look at me, that makes me smile.
And not the smile that I give to everyone to make them think I’m happy, but the genuine smile of my happiness.
The one I’m always embarrassed to say that I have, because I have a weird relationship with my smile, but you make me overcome it because,
You make me happy. Truly happy which is rare for me.
And I’m sorry for all the baggage I come with, I tried to check them in at a hotel, but they said that they only took one bag per customer.
I know it’s not your responsibility to carry these bags, but while I work on bringing them up to the room can you stand next to me?
Can you be there while I make a fool of myself trying to unpack and sort them?
It’s just that when you’re with me, these heavy bags suddenly become weightless, and I feel like I’m the champion of the world.
Although I may feel like the champion, I know it wouldn't be possible without you,
The true champion that is you.
But while we smile and unpack these bags, can we throw some away and furnish the world we’ve been given?
Together we have a chance at shaping the world as we see fit, so I see no problem with turning it into the world of our desires.
Why live in this place if we can’t make it our own?
We can turn it into something that we can both call home.
And even though I am a man living in a patriarchal world.
I am a Black man.
So at times I’m always on edge, never getting a chance to lay and be relaxed.
Together we can make a place where when we lay our heads down, we can both feel safe knowing that the other is near.
And that world can’t hurt us.
Eden is what we can call it, but neither of us are known to eat apples, so there will be no snakes allowed.
I bet if I look back to see how we started it was something embarrassing.
I probably tried to talk to you, but could only get a few words out.
I bet I was so nervous, because why would someone so amazing like you give me the time of day, especially when we live in an age, where time seems to be the only thing that matters.
Somewhere along the line you took pity on the poor soul that is me, and again,
I’m sorry that you have to deal with me.
I don’t always know what to say, or the time to say things, or when not to say things, or what to do, but you still stuck with me.
I can’t promise a lot except that you will always have all of me, nothing less and everything more.
It’s the least I could do, and even then I wish I could give you more.
I wish I did know what to say at times, I wish I wasn’t a nervous mess, I wish I felt like I deserved you, but I will always think you deserve more.
Again, I’m just a mess with a mantra of trying to do my best.
But never for my own sake, I do it all for you.
The future we dream of, the adventures we shall go on, and the world we shall see.
And yes, there will be hard times, nobody ever said Love was easy.
But together we can do it.
Why should the world stop us, when instead we could shape it?
Through the pain we’ll get stronger, our bond strengthened, and our Love tested so much it’ll be unbreakable.
To write of Love is sometimes complicated to me, but I take a step back and think of you, and all the words I need come to me.
Every adjective, noun, vowel, seems to come to me once I put you on my mind.
It gives me the power to pick up a pen and never let it go until everyone knows of our Love.
Loving you, is like a videogame for me.
My earliest and best moments of life deal with them.
I remember my first video game.
I picked it up and had no idea what I was doing.
But I continued to work on it, never giving up until eventually I got it.
And I kept getting better and better each time I tried.
I got stuck sometimes, but I never gave up.
I kept trying until I got it right.
I’m not the best, but I’m dedicated to seeing it through till the very end.
Bitter or sweet.
Hard or easy.
Long or short.
Now I look back at all the poems I’ve ever written. And although they all aren’t addressed to you, I feel like they were all for you.
Practice for trying to find the words to show you that I Love you.
And when I hold your hand, and refuse to let it go, it’s because I’m scared that I’ll never get the chance to hold it again. So I hold it tight, and pray for the day I never have to let it go.
And yes, I believe that even in death, when I am no longer on this earth.
I will still have my connection with you.
Our flames, still burning as bright as ever.
In our next lifetime when we meet each other again, I only have one request.
Give me that look, the one you know will make me smile, the genuine smile which lets you know how happy you make me.
Gabriel Girault Oct 2020
Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
I would love to spend all my time with you.
Even now I dream of futures that may await us.
Each one is more beautiful than the last, and yet nothing compares to you.
I haven’t been religious in a minute, and I find myself on my knees praying that our love lasts past this lifetime.
And although I may simply be a young writer, I would trade the rest of my late college nights just to see you smile. Never again would claws dictate the essence of laws.
Why? Well not only because you can brighten up a room in less time than I can think of an analogy, but because I never want to see you cry. And if you must please let them be of joy.
You’re someone with a heart so pure, I had to double take just to make sure it was real, but not a mirage my mind made up because it was dehydrated of joy. But one made up of simply your Love.
A Love so strong it makes me forget the reasons why I was ever sad in the past, makes me smile so wide my cheeks start hurting from this new expression. Makes me ever forget that I went through a phase, because all of them were simply leading to the best parts of my life.
And every time I think of you the only thing that goes through my mind is:
Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
**** I ******* Love you.
Gabriel Girault Sep 2020
Am I crazy for wanting Love?
It's all I think about when I am without you. You’ve made me think about all the changes in my life. If I had to choose between you and my world, I wouldn't have to pick, because you are my world.
Without your heart, I would be heartless.
I would be 808's and the worst heartbreak. I would be Frank, no Ocean. I used to be solo dolo, the soundtrack to my life would be a trail of tears.
What I’m trying to tell you is that without you my heart beats slower and I lose my rhythm. Without you I just never feel complete. Without you my world seems darker.
Every day and night I would talk to you, now I'm in a place where I cannot strive. The only way for me to pursue my happiness, would be to shoot for the moon, and never fall to the clouds.
The only thing I believe in is Love, and I would be a martyr for it with ease. A world where Love can easily be found, would be a world that lives forever. Nothing could stand in our way, a Love built on trust, is one that could never end.
What is the end? Nobody knows.
But we would face it hand in hand, no fear, only Love.
Nothing can truly stop Love that is pure and strong.
It will triumph above all.
And all will Love.
Gabriel Girault Sep 2020
I can tell you about this for an entire year.
No matter what I shall say, or the tears in my voice. You can't see yourself as beautiful. I've been asking myself again and again, through all my friends.
What has been done for you to see the lies and propaganda as truth.
When I look, I see a beautiful woman. But you can't.
Is it used too much?
Do we need another word?
Has society made such a system, that you can't look beautiful unless you look fake?
I wanna show you that you are beautiful, but even more than that.
The word is used to mean outer appearance.
To be beautiful, you must not be good on the outside, but on the inside. Inner beauty is where an entire world lives. For the beauty that lies inside us all, is what truly makes someone.
But the word is wrapped in evil and lies.
But if I can see you being beautiful and awe inspiring without any makeup or design,
Why can't you?
This is a question I ask myself a lot. I may never find an actual answer, but I know one thing. I know that I shall never lie, about beauty.
Because one of the only truths we have in this world today, is the beauty of the heart itself. So Love yourself as hard as you can. You are
  Sep 2020 Gabriel Girault
UA Slam
Everything is laid out in a cold, soft sheet of bliss. Childlike expressions for all. Children are staying up late playing games and drinking hot chocolate.
They will wake up late into the day, and will go play with the grass's winter bedspread.
Men are sprung out of the ground, they all have a weird orange nose.
With charcoal buttons linking up to make a suit.
They have a top hat that matches their buttons but with a flair of a singular phoenix feather.
Parental units power down, and from them emerges a different specimen.
This species of parent does not care for school or homework, but only for a smile on their family's face, and the warmth of the fire with the scent of chocolate in the air.
They look out the window to watch the lights brighten up their usually bleak neighborhood. They find the piled sheets of winter's rain to be a glorious sight with their family sheltered and together.
~ Gabriel G
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