A Sickening Love: Favorites

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

Liz

I love you, but loving you has become exhaustive
I love you, but I'm tired of your sick jokes and our senseless fights
I love you, but loving you is taking my mind away from me
I love you, but you made me turn into a person I don't like
I love you, but loving you makes me feel so bad I can't sleep
I love you, but this is killing my soul
I love you, but I need to love myself more
I love you, but goodbye.

#love #bad #this #**** #is #sorry

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

I Am Nobody, Really

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

WickedHope

I Am Nobody, Really

I am a half-smirk grinner
an addict and a sinner

I am lonely and broken
a screamer yet soft spoken

I am dead serious
could be delirious

I am not one to eat food
on words I'd rather chew

I am a running joke
the fire and the smoke

I am the forgotten
lost and unwanted

I am the last one picked
I am twisted
And I am sick

I am everyone's last resort.

#life #i #nobody #am #noone #freak #periwinkleribbon

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

The Leaves Are Golden...

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

WickedHope

The Leaves Are Golden...

The leaves are golden

     And I am silver

The wind is a howl

     And I am a whisper

The river is frozen

     And I am a blister

The sun is rising

     And I am setting

The people are leaving

     And I am staying

The stars are twinkling

     And I am thinking

The night is alive

     *And I am ready to live again

This is just a nothing little piece. Ignore it, it's not here. Shhh, I said it's not here. You didn't see it, read it, nothing.
Nothing because sometimes nothings are the best kept secrets.

#life #nature #i #breathe #nothing #live #autumn #leaves #startover #beginagain

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

Sunrise

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

Beaux

Sunrise

The sun rises for me
It sets for you
I've started another empty day without you
You ended a great one without me
I'm struggling through it
You sleep soundly
I can feel the pain
You sink into dreams
I'm lost without you
You couldn't be more found without me

Another day in paradise. Sending prayers to all those who need it.

#pain #magicath

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

Funhouse Reflection

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

WickedHope

Funhouse Reflection

I see my frame bent and bulging
Convex, concave, corrupt
When I look in the mirror
I'm never the same
I am pretty, ugly
Pretty ugly
It's like a game

Today will I eat
No, my distorted reflection
Is enough of a treat

Small chest
Huge ***
This funhouse is a barrel of laughs

Come on, try
What do you see
All I see is a girl in the mirror
I wish was not
Me

No.
No.

#skin #eatingdisorder #ana #reflection #ugly #mirror #skinny #fat #distorted #periwinkleribbon

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

Please

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

The Messiah Complex

Please

Please stop playing games
isn't my heart bruised enough?
have I not bled rivers
for you to bathe in?

“I am not a toy”
and when you twist the knife
I feel it

I need peace
and your song
keeps me swimming
to the deep end of despair

Please stop laughing
once you've made me cry
these tears taste like oceans
and I am more than ready
to drown in them

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

It Has No Doors

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

WickedHope

It Has No Doors

I have a room.

It is a small room.

It has no doors.

I come here often.

It has but one window.

It is too high to see out of or in.

I have no responsibility here.

I have no fears.

I lack wants and needs.

But for one.

Him. With me.

~To be in your arms for but a moment would grant me a lifetime of happiness~
- - -
**11/8/14 - We used to talk about a room we could just be in together, away from the world. I used to love that...

#lonely #desire #alone #boy

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

In Pieces

Nov 2014 A Sickening Love

WickedHope

In Pieces

He can have my arm

You can have my leg

He can have my heart

You can have my torso

And I'll be left
     with my head
     and the rest of
     my tattered body parts
           like always

So empty.
Just don't touch me
Just don't talk to me.
I need to find someone who can love me.
I need to stop tormenting myself.

#love #broken #heart #want #pain #break #hurt #bleeding #head #deadinside