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Ryan Jakes Jun 2014
My darling you could keep my heart in your locker
but your Dad is a wrestler, your brothers are Dockers,
so on our hot lovin' they have put the mockers
'cause I  don't have the guts to face violent cockblockers.

You like to take selfies
You sure like to ROFL
You taught me of two girls, one cup and blue waffles
Your knowledge is endless on things such as these
If only your brothers weren't so hard to please.

They think I'm a man *****, a bounder, a cad,
a love shy lothario, a bit of a "lad"
on this I won't argue, the point is well made
but I'm young (ish) and ***** and like to get laid.

They think you're an angel
but that's not the case
'cause the photos you sent me
were not of your face....
True story....ish :-)
Paul Butters Sep 2011
Where are you Paul?
I'm in Cyberspace Mum.
My Pentium processor has broadbanded me
Into this wondrous realm.
A pixel powered virtual landscape
Peopled by avatars
Speaking Internet Slang.
FFS, *** are you talking about?
She asks.
In so many words.
I **** and ROFL at her incredulity.

It’s full of danger, that Internet, says Mum.
That’s true.
It’s full of paedophiles,
Spammers and trolls.
Hackers.
Chat-rooms and forums
Plagued by flame-wars
And spam enough to fill a trillion tins.
Sites full of viruses, Trojans, malware and spyware.
Cyber-bullies and loons abound.
But I just Love it.
A ****** addiction
Needing every fix.
A realm indeed of quantum singularities,
And imploding nebulae.

Paul Butters

(C) PB 3\9\2011 in Yorkshire.
Dibyendu Sarkar May 2021
The universe makes random jokes 
Like, to know me is a curse 
My personalities make it worse.

The introvert in me is ugly painted with gloomy clouds, stalking demons in the alley loves to mourn as a firstborn sick With numb eyes flick,
tears don't exist anymore.

The extrovert in me is silly painted with colours people never been seen, his smile is flawless and always wander around clueless about why he smiles.

The **** in me is a song or people like to call it wrong, a yearlong gong he writes 'lol' in people's wall with a fluffy cloud inside his brain, 
it reads tetrahydrocannabinol, 
notorious for his vocabulary,
can **** with an epistolary.

The Dib is a broken rib, spoon-feed bib 
He writes out of syllabus with sketchy nib,
runs in a solo trip his life says 'rofl'.

©sarcasticbong
A introspect.
D Conors Jun 2010
oh, really? are you really, rolling
on
the
floor
laughing?

I'd so love to see that...
D. Conors
c. 15 June 2010
Steve D'Beard Jan 2013
I should've guessed
by the nondescript response
teenagers glazed
by 'proper' use of language;
'old-speak' as some would see it
yet to be blessed by a words prowess
fazed by more than 1 syllable
seems inconceivable
and yet text-speak sits,
or rather, should be, languish,
as a hybrid of our languages
prompts me to write this
out of plain literary anguish.

each year on birthdays
write a small poem or limerick
the momentary excitement of opening the card
is lapsed by reason
(it does not contain a £20 note)
the thought bubble denotes
they express some disdain
the speech bubble that follows
the spark in the brain
just another of Uncles gimmicks
lacking the imagination to invoke
something more personal
than a hardback book:
another 200 recipes
for the aspiring young cook

they implied they enjoyed lunchtimes at school
instead wanted an iPad or something
equally expensive and cool

So I try to embrace it
this thing they call urban
write something poetic in text-speak
the very premise of it
is somewhat disturbing
the infinite curve of learning
LOLs from actual LOLS;
the mobile language equivalent
of online voyeurs,
the posters of nonsense,
noobs and trolls

apparently a ROFL
is more-or-less as potent as ****
I scratch my head in wonder
text-speak is used by millions
to converse on a global scale
some how

Q: does SUM exist
(as in 'shut ur mouth' )
is that acceptable?

A: not yet cordially invited on the list
(its an actual word
doesn't count as an acronym)
Im told

the coal face of the lexicon:
indigestible
the steep learning curve:
unpredictable

by your 30s its automatically
re-classified:
Congratulations
You are now officially 'Old'

we are merely wordsmith pedestrians
lost in the tide of text-speak equestrians
jumping and leaping and rolling in SETE and S2R's
are we binned as an S4L, the Spam For Life?
(perhaps I haven't got that abbreviation quite right)

in the context of text-speak
they are suitably troll-like in their essence
forgive me dear teenager
I am but a
SNAG in your presence:

'Sensitive'
(on occasion)
'New
Age' and
'Grown-up'
(given the right persuasion)

the riposte would be SUYF!!
('Shut Up You Fool' - said like MR. T in A-Team)
STM and Spank The Monkey
apologise, SOZ, SRY and Apls
or something equally short,
snappy and funky

at this juncture
before the brain has a puncture
simply BBFN, lest I
BBS or BBIAB or BBIAF
[thankfully this isn't a test]

like WCA
(Who Cares Anyway)
but you'd remark WAI
(and thats I for Idiot)
let out a long distance sigh
wave the imaginary fist
at the youth of yesteryear

all you'd get back was
Wicked Evil Grin
(WEG) for a
Wild *** Guess
(WAG);
a WEG for a WAG
and a PDQ x 2

would be the sum parts of the conversation
between me and you

if language and words and meaning was lost
if acronyms and abbrieviations
in CAPS
was all that there was

*** smeared in ***
with APLS for the PMJI
TXT SPK has got me PML
when MHBFY and
M8s on a MOB crusade
AWOL and dizzy for the next API
MGB for your MF device
throw in some GALGAL logic
where GIGO will simply suffice
Warning: PAW and GJIAGDV
(where the latter is Volcano)
include your GF for some cuddly GBH
and some GHP if she says so

its T2Go
be positive with the T+
and all of that Text-Speak CUZ
I'll T2UL and T for your time,
I'll TAH on the whole TBC

next year i'll just slip in a £20 note
and simply write:
Happy Birthday
with LV
from me
I have a disdain for text-speak as a replacement for language but it seems the only way to converse with teenage cousins on mobile, so I wrote this in response to that.
Miguel Diaz May 2016
***, dat lingwistik ****
is so **** bro.
ppl dun wanna no nefing nemore, well tgif.
i just wanna *** some bishes
nd 4get abt lyf.
I ceebs bein gud wif werdz.
i jst wnt sum roofies 2 hlp me relx.
my comp is lagging 2much.
2 many **** on ytube 2dae.
imma go on COD and shoot sum *****.
jst add me on SC nd u can send me nudes.
i mite c u at da clubs 2nite.
rofl.
YOLO.

inb4 dis is uncomahensabul

dis is 2deep4u.
This is reality. This is the way some idiots speak. I am disgusted by this character, but I also empathise with him.. or "it". I find reality something hard to bare and I am intensely dissapointed in the stupidity and evil of the world. There is humor in this, there misogyny, homophobia, anti intellectualism. Its disgusting. This character is real. We all know this person.

I believe it is unlikely for us to change and in a way we have to **** this person spiritually, metaphorically, literally or use love. Neither of these will work and I believe I had to express it through art. Poetry.

Enjoy.
Paul Butters Jul 2018
Who needs words
When you can simply go ???
Or !!!
!!!
This poem will not make me any £££
Or even $$$
But I don’t give a *.
I just love writing 100%
& don’t *
a d
About £££££.

I <3 to experiment with poetry and language,
Stretching those *
aries.
*** let’s have a good LOL
And even ROFL.
Let’s play the %s
And send my spell-check
Into a red frenzy.

Any ???s ?
You !!!s at this
???
And I’ve only scratched the ~~~~~
There may be ####, #### more to come.
I <3 my Qwerty keyboard
With it’s !”£$%^&()_+ at the top.
The more I look the more I see.
@ last I’m free
From the Grammar ****.
=ly free from the tyranny of the word.

But worry not my lovely words
For I will always go <<<< to you
In spite of looking >>>>>>>
At all times.
The *
*.

Paul Butters

© PB 28\7\2018.
!!! PS I haven't bolded anything to no idea why some is bolded above. And **** shows as * or blank somehow.
Saurabh Tak Sep 2016
On the wheels, I whirl, I spin, I move
Clouds too whirl, then darkness spins
A lightning bolt, then the deafening sound,
Then it pours,
N the fire flies go dim
I dont amble, I dont whisk
Opening my hand, gawking above, I dont decline
Three winks! Drenched n detached from the me wrenching myself,
I wheel as  "The Lance Armstrong"

Heavy pours invite a stroll
Cats and Dogs pouring down dismay Rats, ROFL!
Oust as Prince Zuko, I stroll
Surrendering myself to  the Zephyr
Same trail but with ****** looks
Hypnotic green, drenched, raise me to the Oblivion
Shimmering in the distant are two dim lights
N I ***** like " The Supertramp"

Beginning of the ultimate inception, I touch
Extending my arms to the cries of sky
Dont know the destination of this alley
Trying to think what 'm anticipating
Though without any charge on my shoulders
Flickering in the near distant are two lights
I hike as " The Aron"

'm I tears, I dont know
Even the silence has sulked
Nothing's in my head
Green n Brown, Pink n Purple hues
Repose the folioles, within
Distant lights are passing by now
I stride as " The me"

To the Aisle,
where birds peep, cheep, chirp, quaver, tweet n warble
From the stroll to the stride
's a short walk of hues n blues
The fringes have passed by
Arena's clear n so 'm I.
Jay earnest Jun 2017
eating cranberries from a tree and whispering secrets into the ear of a mule,
spirits guide me.


today is 2017

and I see her on the radio when the clouds darken.

inside of the catacombs sits the sword of leonidus,
still breathing.

I flick on the news and I see heads rolling on the dirt as mothers kick away dustpans full of bones.


a leader is speaking and echoes boom across the pond
and a few words are etched into a tree as dusk follows dawn.


LOL
LOL
LOL
LOL

ROFL
ROFL
ROFL


strawberry toast with jam while nailing slivers of wood into your ***** ****
makes for an interesting Saturday evening in the Hollywood hills.
a cool 78 and fat siliconed ***** with purple streaks make
me dizzy mostly
LOL
Today I forgot to laugh,
instead I "lol'd"
So, technically I'm a liar.
I neither laughed, nor did so out loud.
It was a platitude
It was polite
It was accepted
It was a lie
It could have been worse, I could've ROFL'd
but that is ridiculous.
So, ***, BTT I lied.
IMHO WFM FWIW B3
Copyright © JLB
04/06/2015
02:34 BST
***=oh my God
BTT=back to topic
IMHO=in my honest opinion
WFM=works for me
FWIW=For what it's worth
B3=Blah,blah,blah
untrue Jun 2015
austerity
         from old french "austérité"
                         from late latin "austerus"
                                  from ancient "αὐστηρός"

which is just greek for:*

you dense sheeple voted us again?! rofl
James Alai Nov 2016
no thumbs up????
***!
I posted this because I need the affirmation!
I need to feel known! Out of a zillion people who are interconnected
I wanna be recognized. I wanna be validated!
please. any response will do.
negative or positive.
ROFL or ****
LOL or ***** or U ****
anything!
ughhhhh
If I was a cat I'd play piano
If I was fat i'd sing a techno song
and flail my arms!
I feel so alone
in a world so full of people
please respond
please reply
please? anybody.
I'm alone.




anyone?

anybody out their?

no?

no one at all?




(logs off )
Ember Evanescent Nov 2014
TO DO LIST:
-Paint nails black and silver
-Finish reading that novel I started
-Finish writing that novel I started
-Offer my bus seat to an elderly lady… unless I’m driving the bus.
-Make tea
-Practice piano
-Clean out closet
TO ****** LIST:
-People who have hurt those I love
-Depression
-Suicide
-Unrequited love
-Rejection
-Inadequacy
-ppl who lyk legit totes talk lyk this lol as if they are lyk, texting or whatevz cuz they think its lyk totes adorbz and stuff *** lyk ***** rofl
-People who respond to my paragraph text with: K. or Lol.
-Slow walkers in front of me
-people who sing Xmas carols in June.
TO DATE LIST:
-That guy I’ve liked since the first day I saw him
-Chocolate
-Chocolate’s cousin: Caramel
-Tea
-CHOCOLATE BROWNIES
-Every fictional character I am in love with... there's alot
laura Nov 2018
rofl the test worked
ya throw fits at the mall
speak ***** in a child's voice
i hear delicacy in your dialect
but it's optimism, imagination
on my part, trepidation and mistaken identity
tantrums later, spilled coffee
deforestation in my thought's trees
skinny love, blood in sinks
listening to that song
ya don't dig a whole lot
about him, you don't have a shovel
but you drive your
pink nails in the sheets
it's probably why i can't escape you



How can anyone give up on you
When through your eyes
I can experience the whole cosmos?

How can anyone give up on
Your smile that brings enemies on their knees?

How can anyone give up on
Your crackling laughter that ROFL audiences?

~~~~~

How can I give up on
Your smell, scent & flower fragrance
You carry in your being?

How can I give up on
The way you touch my heart
FOREVER - ever & ever again?

How can I give up on
The way you held me
Every time I fail and fall?

How can I give up on
The way you kiss me
Every day and night?

How can I give up on
The way you whisper
Soft LOVE notes in me?

How can I give up on
Your embraces, hugs & cuddles?

How can I give up on
The way you give me
Your trust and respect?

How can I give up on
The need of you with
Every breathe I inhale-exhale?

How can I give up on you
When my time does not tick
Without chanting your name?

How can I give up on you
When your existence brings
...The birds to sing
...The sun to shine
...The stars to twinkle
...The clouds to rain
...The flowers to bloom
...The world to go round
....The hurts to heal
...How can I?

How can I give up on you
When you keep on giving me
Chances & moments to cherish
Again and again?

How can I give up on you
When I feel so blessed and lucky
To have seen you, met you & known you?

How can I give up on you
When you bring so much of
Smiles, joy & happiness to me?

How can I give up on you
When I see in you
The most beautiful person
Alive on this planet earth?

How can i give up on you
When you are perfect as you are
The way exactly you wish
The way I exactly LOVE you?

How can I give up on you
When I feel bliss LOVING the most
Intelligent and wise person around?

How can I give up on you
When I always see you as a selfless being
Ready to sacrifice everything for me?

How can I give up on you
When you have traveled
A journey of a life-time
On the path of LOVE
That no one else could have taken?

How can I give up on you
When I see you keeping
Each and every promises
You give me with a glance?

How can I give up on you
When you have rebuilt my life
From seed, bloom, blossom & flowers?

How can I give up on you
When I see you fighting your inner demons
Just for keeping me happy and safe?

How can I give up on you
When you show so much power of self-belief
In yourself, me and LOVE?

How can I give up on you
When I can feel your
Soul-LOVE connect?

How can I give up on you
When I need your LOVE the most?

~~~~~

I can't ever give up on your LOVE
Oh - YOU - the deep blue of the sky
Oh - YOU - the deep blue of the oceanic sea?






When you are near me
Like a feather, I float

When I smell your fragrance
Like a breeze, I blow

I lose my balance and fall
When your hands touch me
Like dried leaves of a rustic tree

I ROFL and tumble like a child
When your humor & sarcasm touches me

My eyes roll out tears of joy
With a glance of yours

I dissolve my being into
Your breathe that I smell for days

I sleep-walk for days & nights
When I can not see or feel YOU

I walk into the flower boulevards
To steal every type of flowers & musks
To smell your mystical celestial scent

You are unfair, but your LOVE is fair to me
You often leave behind a thunder & storm in me

Over your hidden calm ocean of BLUE LOVE
I rain my LOVE like torrential downpour

With the sparkling sun in your eyes
You revolve the planet constellations
And my whole universe around YOU

You convey little but show much LOVE

When it is cloudy and when it drizzles
Soon after the rain, when YOU see
The silver lining and the rainbow

That's how I declare my LOVE for YOU

Without YOU and your essence
Without LOVING YOU
There remains no LIFE for me now...



Dredd Dec 2018
are you actually laughing?
did you fall of your seat because it was that funny?

or was it just a silent filler,
filling those awkward pauses just so you can start another conversation.

was it just an automatic response that doesn't have real meaning?
did it make you LOL
or ROFL?

i didn't think so.
it wasn't that funny.

-D.L
Diverse TV Apr 2021
Writing this one on the spot
no judgement for the words that come up
hip..hop...flip...
lol just playing
what words will be spoken today?
which ones wave hello and smile excitedly?
You, over there!
The word on the tip of my tongue
traveled at the speed of light from my mind's eye
Aha! I see you leap into the air
fluttering your syllables and floating
landing on a friendly ear.
Or maybe unfriendly.
Like a potion or a poison
It's not my concoction
I'm reading it just like you
sitting and thinking
"oh that's nice"
"I don't get it"
"haha lol rofl"
Did I do it?
Did I make a poem?
I don't know,
I planted all these word seeds
maybe they'll grow into poetrees.
Did I do it?
I don't know,
but here it is!



I see only in your eyes
That reflects the times we live
Through the crystal clear
Ocean blue sky
Beyond the depth of abyss
All I see in you my LOVE
In all the cosmic parables

The star hole within
The needle rainbow
And those secret
Invisible embraces and
Passionate kisses

If ever there was one
I was to LOVE
It is YOU
No one offers me LOVE
The way you do...

Your heart is my key-less room
To enter and sleep
Your doors are un-locked
Open for me to rest within
We walk together
On the green pastures
Below the dark navy blue skies
To sow our seeds
To harvest our yields

You are the one whom I can rely
I can come and cry
Speak my heart out because
You always gather my pieces
And heal me together

You make my cold warm
I climb on your mountains
And drown in your valleys
You never let me jaded
In the sunset and sunrise
Of the celestial light years

OUR LOVE makes "peace"
LOVE summon inner courage
For us to hold hands and walk
In grief and pain
You make me smile and dance
With your ROFL
Crackling one-liners

There was none before my dreamZ
There was none I believed
You cleared the dust of "I know"
Thus it is world's loss and our gain

YOU always catch me with open arms
When I fall from grace of life
YOU push back the sun and clouds
To bring my innocence back in YOU
I know, you will always show up
If I lost the whole world for YOU

I know, you've gathered my each tear
To make a necklace for your soul
Who would cry LOVE drops
To stop the time cycle for LOVE?

If there is one
It is YOU my BELOVEDz
Who smile on my face
Every night when I weep
The tears of longing

With our infinite LOVE
We demand the galaxy
From every grain-sand of life





Justin S Wampler Mar 2019
Its a poetry website lol you have to write a poem rofl
*******
Alla you
Gee May 2019
I write 'Just let me love you' on the paper

And apparently you found the paper

Then you think those words are for you

ROFL, it's not for you.
Lawrence Hall Feb 10
Lawrence Hall, HSG
Mhall46184@aol.com

                        Reader Responses in the U. K. Daily Mail

RepubliCraps. Demoncrats. Repugs. DemoCraps. MAGA. Magats. Maggots. Clown. Orange clown. Clowns. Clown show. Absolute clown show. Absolute ****** clown show. Diaper Joe. Dr. Potatohead. *****. Selected not elected. Deplorables. Trailer trash. Absolute trailer trash. Said no one ever. Oh wait. Lock her up. Lock him up. Throw away the key. Absolutely. Joebama. Drumpf. Dump. Woke. Wokista. Wokerati. Absolutely Woke. Biden’s America. Trump’s America. Mean tweets. No mean tweets. These teachers. These schools. These universities. TDS. Absolute TDS. Liberal idiots. Extremist idiots. Absolute idiots. ROFL. Grab some popcorn. …in 1, 2, 3…  Dumpster fire. Absolute dumpster fire. You can’t make this stuff up. Train wreck. Absolute train wreck. Car crash. Absolute car crash. Total car crash. The jokes write themselves. At its finest. Pure evil. Absolute pure evil. Cue crickets. Of biblical proportions. Of epic proportions. Of absolute epic biblical proportions. Rinse and repeat. Rules for thee but not for me. Two-tier justice system. Absolute two-tier justice system. You could look it up. Follow the science. Full stop. LOL. End of. Absolutely. Fact. FACT!!!!!

— The End —