My sick twisted gaze
On the women and the men
Thigh gaps, finger bones, ribs.

I have the
Uncanny ability
To manufacture misery
In my head
Like it’s my job.
The words dance like
Madness
  down my body.
Until I am forced
To release their
Fury
Between my wet,
       dripping
               Thighs.

                         -L.Frost

you made me believe in love a g a i n,
despite all of the danger lethally submerged in the bottom waiting to resurface,
despite my movements of cautionary measure in this dance for two,
despite the clear tell-tale warnings

you made me believe in love;

only to prove all the impending signs of doom
and my doubts right
only to have made a fool of myself
and develop a surreal hatred over it

only to serve as a reminder-
that i'm not cut out
for silly little intimacies,
called love

oh, don’t you know?
you’re made of paper
skin more featherweight than porcelain could ever be
bones kindled to flames in the whim of a match

oh you’re just floating through
haven’t you figured out?
you’re lighter than dust
time remains eternal as you let the wind carry you
you’re just as hollow as a ghost’s residue

decay is easy,
decompose by a lighter’s rage
torture caused by slits, disintegrate into pieces or turn into shreds
won’t somebody tell you how to stay afloat

when the world pours down all its weight onto the lightness of your being,
how do you not sabotage your own strings when they’re all tangled up?
how do you shout at the wind against its hurtful breeze to take you anywhere but here?
for you don’t know where you should be but it’s just not here?

your ribcage tearing up, insides spilling out

-how do you not let the flames devour you whole when it’s all that’s left for you?

i hope you find your place
a dwelling of your safe and sound
be it-
a cafe,
a building,
a house,
some space confined by four walls,
the space between a pair of arms,
a library,
free gigs,
the seashore,
your bathroom,
a twenty four hour convenience store,
an empty parking lot,
a skate park,
your room,
someone else’s room,
a rooftop,
the spaces kept kindled by your lungs,
or your bones,
or every beat of your heart;
i hope you find your place

-a place to get lost only to be found; a home

a black quilt patched up with diamonds for stars looming above us,
our feet effortlessly following through the steps
even when we’re both bad at dancing
you spin me around
and pull me in for a dip
all the while having your eyes trained on mine
with the kind of emotion i can't quite decipher
but i didn’t mind-
in the back of my mind this could pass off as the one where i'm in a white dress and gold could be found on both of our ring fingers- the orchestra plays the song once more
and when we finally finish off,
there was even a smattering of applauses from the crowd
the scene ending with us taking a bow
-little did we know that we were dancing to our swan song

the stars seem to have aligned this time, perhaps the first
the odds are up and not against their favor, rewritten
the sky lights up, a whole canvas of black illuminated because of them, for them-

or so they thought

too oblivious
for not far long is a meteor shower
happens only once in who knows how long
twice if you’re fortunate;
they weren’t

and so all is meant for skyfall-
asteroids, meteorites, dusts, ashes; the galaxy
their fate’s scratched upon scattered in debris
nebulas forged with everything they’ve shared
plagued in bits, slowly ceasing their existence
strings pushed, pulled, tied together
weaving in constellations shaped in the glory of their names and being
should’ve, they should’ve known from the very start
should’ve known better

that the stars were never in their favor
just setting themselves up for a trap,
****** even when lifted to the celestial
they should’ve known
the moment they first started rotating in each other’s axis
stuck on a merciless gravitational force hurtling at such a speed
down

          down

                    downwards

crashing, ****** up by a black hole

-should’ve been contented seeing each other with astral projection

my ghosts are fond of your ghosts-
perhaps you are my exorcism
i guess we should stay with each other’s souls
as my pasts and your pasts get cleansed

yet you must know
that the horrors of what has been before you
can’t ever compare to the threats
that losing you magnifies

-so we’ll stay together ‘til we could get past walls, tenants of a house we’ll haunt