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"reformation" poems
** A fast-track court in the capital city; A Judiciary of a democratic Country; Hearing the a gang-rape case, reserved its order on the quantum of Punishment for the four convicted in the Gang-rape and ****** of a 23-year-old innocent girl A 237- page judgment, Noting that that the Crime was committed in an extremely brutal manner. “The major part of her intestine was pulled out from the body,” the Doctor  said. The prosecution has sought the death penalty for the four convicts, while the Defense lawyers for the Convicted are pleading for a lenient verdict. The arguments in the gruesome gang-rape case are over and sentencing will be announced at 2.30 pm on Friday, 13th September, 2013 "The sentence which is very appropriate is nothing short of death," special public prosecutor told the court. “The common man will lose faith in the judiciary if the harshest punishment is not given “ the Judge remarked; Guilty of ****** Gang **** Unnatural *** Criminal conspiracy,   destruction of evidence, Kidnapping and attempting to **** the  eyewitness  said The fifth convict Committed suicide in Tihar Jail in March this year The sixth convict was a juvenile at the time of the incident and has been given a three- year term in a reformation home. A fast-track court, A Judiciary of a democratic Country will order Stop Crime against women ! “Hang them, Not let them go free” ** ______________________________________________ BY WILLIAMSJI MAVELI
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Sep 11, 2013
Sep 11, 2013 at 7:32 AM UTC
“ Hang them, Not let them go ! ”
Plundering corruption A boy an apple from a tree Son you know that is wicked Come on, and follow me. You saw that strange fruit growing The poor a hanging from a tree Let's sing another song boys Call it US democracy I free all kinds of good boys In my old boy kinda way From tyranical oppression To the kinder Gentler me And I say you must reform now To our ever wanking little whim Chairman Bush is on a roll now Thinks he's facking Chairman Mao.
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Jul 15, 2013
Jul 15, 2013 at 2:12 PM UTC
The ****** of The Reformation
Now deadline entrapped! Deadline to safe life Deadline to take food Deadline to drink water Deadline to breathe air! Now dead line entrapped! Deadline to recharge vitality Deadline to recharge vanity Deadline to recharge - cover-up felony! Now deadline entrapped!   Deadline to makeover Deadline to sprawl Deadline to crawl Deadline to growl Deadline to haul! Now deadline entrapped! Deadline to behold toxicity Deadline to amuse atrocity Deadline to submit buoyancy Deadline to ****** and welcome grief I It is the deadline for post modern reformation!
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Mar 29, 2015
Mar 29, 2015 at 5:29 PM UTC
Deadline
I have done time in the prison of the mind sewed a blue chip on my shoulder left the valley to roam and wander nurtured a black, tormented seed gave myself over to a blind man's need I have done time in the sanctity of the moment stripped down, undone, naked, free felt the healing waters wash me clean nurtured a bright, unfettered soul gave myself over, finally whole
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Mar 18, 2016
Mar 18, 2016 at 11:54 AM UTC
Reformation Blues
Communication technology recognition Reformation in monopoly contortions Feel the attuned tunes from satellites Setting light like an antenna televised Usher prolific hologram vised in vision Bid manipulation bye to new world neon’s Motivation from free thought movement Commendations cemented in another time-zone Complement to comment for extra terrestrials Electrical vibrations moving from wired modems   Floating up above the skies, a heaven end   All life become a past tense lie, come lie A dead fantasy for the oars ain’t tacky The most surreal reality, the stability, an ability Congeniality, this is an alien evasion, adaptability Figure a boxer on the ring, trenching victory An agility the accessibility to the victorious flag Tracing admissible tunes, planking in a cool challenge The heroic and not hectic hologram check the angiogram Its not a diagram, but a radiant heart an earthy soul Am a do anything, buffing myself to do anything Ain’t a deal rocking the crowd in crazy clouds Breaking the underground like a Fujita F Scale tornado Ronaldo tormenting the ball in a field with F clef societal Social control and orders, tormenting the ****** to extraordinaire, an extradite Streaming live make you believe like you can live for real Stratifications, ****** classes and sewn mobility Chasing dreams in the winds deeply wheeled in a well Be well as we sink  so deep to seek and hold the dense The essence of the whirlwind, it’s a seep through static This rollercoaster an aspiration to inspire then perspire Ever higher, from the root to crown charkra, a tantra Annata,the ascending holographic magnetic hero Tuning visions to dreamers and travellers Hold my hand as we sink underneath the stratums No sputum, just headphones.... a culture, it’s the new age soul
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Jan 10, 2016
Jan 10, 2016 at 4:47 PM UTC
Monopoly Contortions
Communication technology recognition Reformation in monopoly contortions Feel the attuned tunes from satellites Setting light like an antenna televised Usher prolific hologram vised in vision Bid manipulation bye to new world neon’s Motivation from free thought movement Commendations cemented in another time-zone Complement to comment for extra terrestrials Electrical vibrations moving from wired modems   Floating up above the skies, a heaven end   All life become a past tense lie, come lie A dead fantasy for the oars ain’t tacky The most surreal reality, the stability, an ability Congeniality, this is an alien evasion, adaptability Figure a boxer on the ring, trenching victory An agility the accessibility to the victorious flag Tracing admissible tunes, planking in a cool challenge The heroic and not hectic hologram check the angiogram Its not a diagram, but a radiant heart an earthy soul Am a do anything, buffing myself to do anything Ain’t a deal rocking the crowd in crazy clouds Breaking the underground like a Fujita F Scale tornado Ronaldo tormenting the ball in a field with F clef societal Social control and orders, tormenting the ****** to extraordinaire, an extradite Streaming live make you believe like you can live for real Stratifications, ****** classes and sewn mobility Chasing dreams in the winds deeply wheeled in a well Be well as we sink  so deep to seek and hold the dense The essence of the whirlwind, it’s a seep through static This rollercoaster an aspiration to inspire then perspire Ever higher, from the root to crown charkra, a tantra Annata,the ascending holographic magnetic hero Tuning visions to dreamers and travellers Hold my hand as we sink underneath the stratums No sputum, just headphones.... a culture, it’s the new age soul
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36
Some days I feel it's better to remain alone Because I can grow more in my imagination Than I can in this world. All of reality stripped to the bone Creating my own metaphysical reformation Where my illusions become uncurled. Finally grasping at the unknown As I create the perfect salvation My cosmos becomes impearled.
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Feb 26, 2013
Feb 26, 2013 at 5:05 AM UTC
Isolation Glorification
I want to erase the figment of my imagination that I’ve allowed you to becomeYou are so opportunistic having used every moment we ever had as a time of spawningYou left traces of yourself that would grow beyond what my mind could containand with your absencethose pieces of you have enlargedThey’ve progressed into long thick arms having my thoughts in choke holds that the top wrestlers have yet to discoverThanks for showing me who you really areYour name is Monsterand I want to remove your electromagnetic tentacles from the nerves of my brainsever your suction cups coat them in a batter flavored with lemon pepper seasoningand deep fry them turn your manipulative tactics into a fine cuisine for the hungered palettes of innocent bystanders that will chew you upswallow youand digest you as the waste of time this aspect of youhas been to meToo bad I’m not bulimicAfter the binge of these false memories I’d gladly shove my finger down my throat and ***** you into filthy toilet bowlsflushing you ‘til you reach your destinationwelcomed by a sea of sewageWhen it comes to the likes of youamnesia has never been so desired.
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Feb 26, 2010
Feb 26, 2010 at 9:56 PM UTC
NUCLEAR REFORMATION
Reformation Concentration Discrimination Segregation Just a human rat race Denied, denied My passion gone I cried, I cried My whole life long Mine They trample on our men And leave us in turmoil There is no wind The smoke lingers Oh eagle fly high Get away Away from your once proud home Neo played the violin When they burned Rome Not I I can lead Bold ideas I know what I must do Mine My hatred My blame Put upon the stain The stain on the beautiful white canvas Take away Dignity Hope Rip their homes apart From the ghetto to the train From the train to the gates From the gates to annihilation Yes No Fall back Push forward We shall not fall My land My world This is the attempt that will end my reign They won’t get the best of me They lived in fear of me And she’s coming with me It is mine
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Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 5:44 PM UTC
Devastation of a Despot
The hatred towards the government, Implemented by the opposition, Practiced by the citizen, And now, it is like a tradition, From generation to generation, From provocation to demonstration, Taking it to the street is the habitation, Screaming and shouting for no reason, A battalion of protestors controlled by politician, A never ending fight between transformation and reformation, To rule the country and win the election, To make it to Putrajaya, that's the mission, To make confusion is the only conclusion, And making politics a priority than religion, These corrupted people ruined our nation, With their twisted tongue and telling facts that are fiction, Telling lies to the people has become an addiction, Spreading ideology with their sweet persuasion, And influence a generation that's lacking in patience,
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Dec 26, 2014
Dec 26, 2014 at 6:23 AM UTC
Hatred Towars The Government
As time goes on humans adapt in many different ways as all living things do. We grow intellectually, emotionally, spiritually but more often than not fears, doubts, insecurities, envies run rampant in our expanding minds. Toxicity, too, develops rippling out, engulfing anyone near in a flame of hate charring them beyond recognition. Adapting, hand in hand with survival, dictates we raise walls barriers to protect ourselves if only to withstand even more punishment, then repeat the cycle. But the thirst for animosity has to be quenched, leading to rampant searches for more and more ways to hurt each other. A propensity for cruelness overrides any potential at reformation, reconciliation or any sort of repairing all the tethers that have eroded away with vigor.
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Jun 2, 2016
Jun 2, 2016 at 10:48 PM UTC
Toxicity
Born to be inscrutable although maybe, it's disputable somethings are not so mutable when boy and girl, unsuitable Clothes will go out first you won't know, you're coerced no more to quench your thirst as in her now, immersed A bad boy reputation the girl with expectation attempting reformation you're into, transformation Down the path to bliss you must remember this a kiss is just a kiss it's yourself, you'll miss
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Sep 14, 2017
Sep 14, 2017 at 8:46 AM UTC
She'll change you boy
Monotony surrounds us We're stuck within a vault There will be no more success After this assault Such a troubled state of mind That takes us to this place Our thoughts have been redesigned For no one to replace Reformation takes its toll With no regard for identity As one by one, we lose control Of what used to be serenity
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Dec 8, 2012
Dec 8, 2012 at 6:08 PM UTC
What Used to Be
In sullen stride of affirmation, I felt no dream of destination; But in drowning deceit of sick starvation, I sighed in hopes of constellations. In worlds between of deprivation, I surrendered my frame to degradation. Out of full eyed, absent minded generations Came my continuous reformation.
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Apr 11, 2016
Apr 11, 2016 at 2:13 PM UTC
Improvement
I am your pendulum Swaying from the gallows The world tips beneath me I am your keeper What I am You are destined to become Momentum and Gravity Carry you To your fate Every step a gilded weight I am your redemption I am your reformation Your final exclamation To fair weathered life
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Apr 23, 2012
Apr 23, 2012 at 12:16 AM UTC
Gallows
Directing the populace to march through cities and suburbs Rifles held in militant fashion, all are one Dictate the reformation and find solace in those who are still here Leverage made by battles won, solitude to those who are all gone Eaten by the moths in sand, my clothing is stripped into bands Crazy not to walk away when my friends disintegrate in my hands When your leg flies through the air and hits me knocking me away Looking into the sunset and pondering if it's real or the fray Sober is not acceptable here, crack the bottle into the lake Swim under the radar and love in flying bullet parades My gathering for a new world, will wait patiently out in the rain While the ruler converts all their wives and drowns away your sorrows in its veins Genius, pure and swift. Powers are unconfirmed regrets Should I have let you win when you begged for the apex, the crest Stupid and young all are, escaping from the facility's sweet arms Simple and refined we will accept you into our swarm Remember the cars are gone, the money gone, religion gone Remember all is mine, all is yours, all is ours Remember ownership and government is dead Remember all of your worries are in your head
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Aug 27, 2013
Aug 27, 2013 at 2:08 PM UTC
crusade
Jack jumped last night. We might have expected it had we not been so unsuspecting. Those blue periods of his, I'm sure you've witnessed one, were walled in somewhat by the swelling tides of years and years and years. When they came, they were quelled by the very occasional red mark. These punctuations when they mercifully visited would open doors for him, in which our brother, neighbor, father discovered strange liquid tendencies to ailing strength. Too many blank-out nights could find him and his new battery bickering the old childhood verses. Too many four-of-the-clocks would cue the choragos his specter-critic's eye to deign a Plan on our friend's blue stationary. A smile might have mailed it straight ahead. Perhaps it was last week when the boat met the shore, some heinous delivery of packaged, patent-business sealed reformation, salvation. In the midst of his violet smile the cogent steam engine had a chute into which it might heartily crash. However it came remains to be seen. What we have all seen this morning remains our family's chief export. Jack jumped last night. He ascended the hill with his red hands full of ****** punctuation marks, and he spouted full-rehearsed all those lines he'd learned in grade school. Like a prolix Gertrude complaining of her thirst. And with the singularity of purpose that haunts even the sharpest eyes, he completes the trek to his three-foot tall Kusinagara with his asthma wrapped around his neck. Victory is a queer bird. Its song is never heard the whole way through. He breathes in weightlessness, regains his bearing and waits for the lines to quiet down. No one should leave in the middle of a recitation, regardless of the quality. At last, "Richard Cory" reaches his terminal syllable and our dearest man searches for his place in the music. And it's just a minute, just a minute, just a minute, jumps. Jack jumped last night Just as he said he would, And had we heard him say it We'd have thought "He could. He could."
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Feb 24, 2010
Feb 24, 2010 at 6:49 PM UTC
Singing to the Candlestick
Jack jumped last night. We might have expected it had we not been so unsuspecting. Those blue periods of his, I'm sure you've witnessed one, were walled in somewhat by the swelling tides of years and years and years. When they came, they were quelled by the very occasional red mark. These punctuations when they mercifully visited would open doors for him, in which our brother, neighbor, father discovered strange liquid tendencies to ailing strength. Too many blank-out nights could find him and his new battery bickering the old childhood verses. Too many four-of-the-clocks would cue the choragos his specter-critic's eye to deign a Plan on our friend's blue stationary. A smile might have mailed it straight ahead. Perhaps it was last week when the boat met the shore, some heinous delivery of packaged, patent-business sealed reformation, salvation. In the midst of his violet smile the cogent steam engine had a chute into which it might heartily crash. However it came remains to be seen. What we have all seen this morning remains our family's chief export. Jack jumped last night. He ascended the hill with his red hands full of ****** punctuation marks, and he spouted full-rehearsed all those lines he'd learned in grade school. Like a prolix Gertrude complaining of her thirst. And with the singularity of purpose that haunts even the sharpest eyes, he completes the trek to his three-foot tall Kusinagara with his asthma wrapped around his neck. Victory is a queer bird. Its song is never heard the whole way through. He breathes in weightlessness, regains his bearing and waits for the lines to quiet down. No one should leave in the middle of a recitation, regardless of the quality. At last, "Richard Cory" reaches his terminal syllable and our dearest man searches for his place in the music. And it's just a minute, just a minute, just a minute, jumps. Jack jumped last night Just as he said he would, And had we heard him say it We'd have thought "He could. He could."
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65
Golden bells,—bedight o'er towers— Amidst the betrothing melody, The touch of stained glass— Beams the rosary beads Binding me with a man held high; Now to be crowned his wife.      "My lord, lend me thy right hand,       As thy loyal servant,—        I vow to pledge our country." The Moonlight Song,— let our haunches be mere pitches— Of forests rocked by branches Ah, my fatal reverie— Savor this antique scenery, With classic gothic frames, And worn laces,—Peaking the figures'desires Cradle me,— And thou shalt drink my glass,— To offer a sip;-- so to paint moist on windows. Sunrise, leap me to this town!— How gracious men and children, I shalt dress all thee;-—Make a stronghold that prospers the needy; Lest the void of promised land— Wither the faith of mankind. With the King's side, Reformation sets the nation to affluence; The bonfire relives the glorious centuries— Never scorn, swords unfold!
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May 6, 2020
May 6, 2020 at 3:17 AM UTC
"Resurrection"-- Betrothal: The Reign
10/11/12 the sun has died,  and yet the planets still orbit. the fish swim in a char black ocean,  dead current. the bull charges blindly into the ruins of the arena. if god looks down, then he's tired of my being cared for. he sent a truck and a tumor to get me to care more. and having failed at that, he saw fit to pull my heart out. the flaw in god is that, he pulls too hard on the puppet strings. you can bring a camel to water, but you can never make it drink. he can send two plagues to reform me, and in the end I still think. this is clear punishment for living life without god. this is the reformation of nothing, and nobody. this is the admission that I'll happily keep rotting.
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Mar 2, 2013
Mar 2, 2013 at 1:22 AM UTC
an atheists dilemma after a car crash
I’m going to each of my suitemates' rooms. One at a time, methodically. I pause, for dramatic purpose, until I have their full attention. Once I have it, I rushingly, excitedly, breathlessly say, “I’M getting pizza later, for the GAME!” Like a seven year old child. Now, my roommates KNOW we're ordering pizzas later. They’re all “on board,” everyone’s submitted their order and venmo’d their money to Sunny who will actually place the order for delivery at 5:30 pm. But I’m excited. I LOVE pizza (and American, NFL football) and I love being childish. My roommates, like my brother, sister and parents before them, know this and love my manic, overactive way of excising tedium. Besides, I won’t do this more than once or twice - ok, maybe three times today before the pizza comes. Since you’ve read this far - allow me to opine, for a moment, about “self restraint.” Have you read about how they’re using familial DNA to solve old cold-case murders? I think they should use familial DNA to track down whomever it was that invented self restraint. It was probably some old Protestant. I mean, Catholics only have sin - it’s yes or no - binary. So without researching it (at all), I think we’re dealing with someone born after the protestant reformation of 1555 - but I’m flexible. Anyway, they should track that person down, dig them up, beat them with a stick, and then rebury them, in unhallowed ground. I hate self restraint. It’s so.. restraining. #restraintsux
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Jan 23, 2022
Jan 23, 2022 at 9:06 AM UTC
pizza delivery
I’m going to each of my suitemates' rooms. One at a time, methodically. I pause, for dramatic purpose, until I have their full attention. Once I have it, I rushingly, excitedly, breathlessly say, “I’M getting pizza later, for the GAME!” Like a seven year old child. Now, my roommates KNOW we're ordering pizzas later. They’re all “on board,” everyone’s submitted their order and venmo’d their money to Sunny who will actually place the order for delivery at 5:30 pm. But I’m excited. I LOVE pizza (and American, NFL football) and I love being childish. My roommates, like my brother, sister and parents before them, know this and love my manic, overactive way of excising tedium. Besides, I won’t do this more than once or twice - ok, maybe three times today before the pizza comes. Since you’ve read this far - allow me to opine, for a moment, about “self restraint.” Have you read about how they’re using familial DNA to solve old cold-case murders? I think they should use familial DNA to track down whomever it was that invented self restraint. It was probably some old Protestant. I mean, Catholics only have sin - it’s yes or no - binary. So without researching it (at all), I think we’re dealing with someone born after the protestant reformation of 1555 - but I’m flexible. Anyway, they should track that person down, dig them up, beat them with a stick, and then rebury them, in unhallowed ground. I hate self restraint. It’s so.. restraining. #restraintsux
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9
. Waves of psychic nausea make the teeth shiver, as the mind grates on lava and the cloak pulls tight. An echo from an illusion permeates the imagination. glistening with rancid dew resplendent in its own reflection. The image mirrored is not the genuine original. The genuine original is not the image mirrored. Born of the same picture yet entities of separate strokes, Romulus and Remus consort to blur the edges and paint the story. The host, confused and special, supplicates to the paths, waiting for the reformation, release, relief, and re-definition. © Pagan Paul (19/06/17)
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Jun 20, 2017
Jun 20, 2017 at 4:43 AM UTC
Mind Flux
Outside cars line up ticketed Rickety in a rusty mist of San Francisco fog High heel and blonde echoing up to my window. The traffic is light The stars are distant and bright A night in present to be remembered falsely We take many things for granted A laugh bounds against the high wall of this city's illusion Many smiles, many grins, along with many ruins I thought we were being bombed today Work between my fingers the lights flickered above me And I thought, "This is the day I die, and I die alone." Around these corner alleyways the meter maids purr Transcending human emotion ordered by rules & safety The wind feels no guilt when it destroys The Earth, ocean, and fire neither These elementals, they play with us like pawn pieces We can only bow and obey At noon the abstract grip their baskets Made of pencil lead, plastic, and porcelain Hours pass and the power they wished for Slips through their shaking, cracked fingers At least the weather is good here All good things appear near An abundance of ripe fortitude Makes solitude precious & everlasting Hold fast to true strength and virtue The darkest hour produces the greatest light Hold fast to your skills and talents Challenges shape the ones who will not be fallen "TIghter," ordered the tailor, a drop of sweat dangling from his nose, "Attention to the detail, this will not be a failure." Concentrating, the apprentice's hands shaking, squinted his one good eye Into the thin hole of the needle, the other side infinities void The bare fire was outrageous with how little heat it was giving His hands shaking from the cold, the wind hoarse Outstretching pale fingers, the thread through the needle
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Apr 3, 2013
Apr 3, 2013 at 1:24 PM UTC
Reformation
Outside cars line up ticketed Rickety in a rusty mist of San Francisco fog High heel and blonde echoing up to my window. The traffic is light The stars are distant and bright A night in present to be remembered falsely We take many things for granted A laugh bounds against the high wall of this city's illusion Many smiles, many grins, along with many ruins I thought we were being bombed today Work between my fingers the lights flickered above me And I thought, "This is the day I die, and I die alone." Around these corner alleyways the meter maids purr Transcending human emotion ordered by rules & safety The wind feels no guilt when it destroys The Earth, ocean, and fire neither These elementals, they play with us like pawn pieces We can only bow and obey At noon the abstract grip their baskets Made of pencil lead, plastic, and porcelain Hours pass and the power they wished for Slips through their shaking, cracked fingers At least the weather is good here All good things appear near An abundance of ripe fortitude Makes solitude precious & everlasting Hold fast to true strength and virtue The darkest hour produces the greatest light Hold fast to your skills and talents Challenges shape the ones who will not be fallen "TIghter," ordered the tailor, a drop of sweat dangling from his nose, "Attention to the detail, this will not be a failure." Concentrating, the apprentice's hands shaking, squinted his one good eye Into the thin hole of the needle, the other side infinities void The bare fire was outrageous with how little heat it was giving His hands shaking from the cold, the wind hoarse Outstretching pale fingers, the thread through the needle
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37
On a throne in Rome is where satan is seated; eating the flesh of man; like a pagan Caesar being fed grapes. He sits, awaiting man, to kneel before him: kissing the ring. Drinking the blood of man, by his royal cup; that which he never touches with his own fingers. King of all kings, lord of all lords; pope, pontiff patriarch and arch-bishop of all Christendom -- rejects you Rome. From the schism to the Reformation, yet the prey are tempted as you ****** a bogus return. To/from an institution steeped in crises; openly admitting its satanic infiltration. Men adorn you with biblical claims of negative revelation. As if your satanic throne was of divine establishment. Claiming a unity that never was. Your foes thinking 'denominations' are a division of Christ's Church. While you knowing that 'a house divided cannot stand'. Awaken your souls hiding among the farther Eastern 'Church', or those farther West. Separated brethren --or-- imitation Christian may your throne be carried on your shoulders by those observing your divine monarchy. Hail Popery! As you in self-pity's pedestal sight Peter. While the post-Protestant ecclesial coward prey sight Judas. © S. Wesley Mcgranor
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Feb 10, 2015
Feb 10, 2015 at 11:49 AM UTC
Seat of Satan On Earth
I go to a party. You ask to come along. You join us, you make a mess, we leave and then return... I try to help. I always try to help. I have to take you home, in the end. You apologise profusely, but I deny your apologies. I am happy to help. I feel useful, for once. Comforting friends is one of the few ways in which I manage to feel useful. You get home safe. I'm relieved. But then she saddens... She tries to laugh it off, as she says that she's not okay. As soon as I let her know that it's okay to not be okay, she loses it. I hold her. I hold her so tightly. I rub her arm and pull her body closer to mine. She feels warm, but I can only imagine how cold she is on the inside. I make an attempt, but I have no clue how to cheer her up. If I'm honest, I don't think that she needs to be cheered up at all. She needs to feel this pain. She is so incredibly strong and I know that she should let herself feel it. She needs to accept that it's over. He's gone. It's terrible, but he's ******* gone. "It's sore, it's so sore," she tells me, through her sobs... I pull her closer still. I won't ever let her feel this hurt again. I love her. More and more friends gather around us and they all love her as much as I do. As much as he should. *That ******* **** We cheer her up, temporarily, and she moves back onto the dancefloor. They all dance and I go for some air. They tell me that I am a man in their eyes. I thank them, and I mean it, yet I can't help but feel sort of off... I cherish their words, of course, but it shouldn't have to be like this. I need a distraction. Whether it be blood trickling down my arm, or smoke filling up my lungs, I want to **** it. I want to **** this dysphoria. This feeling of being wrong. I'd love to feel right, for a change. Why am I such an outcast? I don't stand out, because no one sees me, but I definitely don't fit in... I just want to be myself, inside and out, but I don't have the consent to do so. They should've realised by now that this is what I need. I need help. I need more than just beautiful friends and family and alcohol and pain... I need reassignment, not just reformation. I need medical help, not just therapeutical. I need love, not just care. Love... True love. Sure, the thought counts, but I am in need of one ******* gesture. One in particular. I need it to be consensual. You give me consent to kiss you. I argue. YOU DON'T WANT ME. But you swear that you do. "I don't want you to feel things," you admit, with tears flooding down your face. Well, neither do I! But I can't ******* help it. I should really sleep, but now I need to feel things. Something. Anything. Even if it is just the tears that I'm crying. At least it's something. But sometimes nothing is better than something. I think we both need to remember that. So forget your apologies. I apologise. I can't feel anything anymore... I just want to feel euphoria.
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Aug 26, 2015
Aug 26, 2015 at 8:07 PM UTC
Help
I go to a party. You ask to come along. You join us, you make a mess, we leave and then return... I try to help. I always try to help. I have to take you home, in the end. You apologise profusely, but I deny your apologies. I am happy to help. I feel useful, for once. Comforting friends is one of the few ways in which I manage to feel useful. You get home safe. I'm relieved. But then she saddens... She tries to laugh it off, as she says that she's not okay. As soon as I let her know that it's okay to not be okay, she loses it. I hold her. I hold her so tightly. I rub her arm and pull her body closer to mine. She feels warm, but I can only imagine how cold she is on the inside. I make an attempt, but I have no clue how to cheer her up. If I'm honest, I don't think that she needs to be cheered up at all. She needs to feel this pain. She is so incredibly strong and I know that she should let herself feel it. She needs to accept that it's over. He's gone. It's terrible, but he's ******* gone. "It's sore, it's so sore," she tells me, through her sobs... I pull her closer still. I won't ever let her feel this hurt again. I love her. More and more friends gather around us and they all love her as much as I do. As much as he should. *That ******* **** We cheer her up, temporarily, and she moves back onto the dancefloor. They all dance and I go for some air. They tell me that I am a man in their eyes. I thank them, and I mean it, yet I can't help but feel sort of off... I cherish their words, of course, but it shouldn't have to be like this. I need a distraction. Whether it be blood trickling down my arm, or smoke filling up my lungs, I want to **** it. I want to **** this dysphoria. This feeling of being wrong. I'd love to feel right, for a change. Why am I such an outcast? I don't stand out, because no one sees me, but I definitely don't fit in... I just want to be myself, inside and out, but I don't have the consent to do so. They should've realised by now that this is what I need. I need help. I need more than just beautiful friends and family and alcohol and pain... I need reassignment, not just reformation. I need medical help, not just therapeutical. I need love, not just care. Love... True love. Sure, the thought counts, but I am in need of one ******* gesture. One in particular. I need it to be consensual. You give me consent to kiss you. I argue. YOU DON'T WANT ME. But you swear that you do. "I don't want you to feel things," you admit, with tears flooding down your face. Well, neither do I! But I can't ******* help it. I should really sleep, but now I need to feel things. Something. Anything. Even if it is just the tears that I'm crying. At least it's something. But sometimes nothing is better than something. I think we both need to remember that. So forget your apologies. I apologise. I can't feel anything anymore... I just want to feel euphoria.
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Can you taste the disappointment When you linger on my lips Cold scents long languished Sparking dead neuronic wisps A frantic reformation For an addict to the bliss In the dust realms of a blanket life Where fiction can exist I’m the broken bones you found alone And kissed into a whole I know That everybody dreams of the soul they had, the soul they let go But I’ll find a way, hold high this ache Breathe life into every mistake And grow Into the man you never had, but mourn to this day I’m grateful For everything
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Feb 26, 2014
Feb 26, 2014 at 3:48 PM UTC
we will languish. we will flourish.
♛   ♛   ♛ Martin Luther, righteous King, made the Reformation sing. Popes and peasants, out of key turned it into misery. German beer and Roman crimes made for most uncivil times much like our own. We must confess rights and wrongs we yet possess... Half a millennium later on a Baptist pastor and his son took this noble Saxon name and furthered the Reformer's fame. Some revisionists deny St. Martin Luther's role, and try to minimize theology in civil rights chronology. The second Luther of my song inspired—but did not last as long. Social Justice notwithstanding, King's successors need re-branding. Politicians steal his mantle, cloak their lies in his example; agitators claim his glory pushing God out of the story; educators sing his praises but some people's conduct raises doubts about that dream of King— and hope... and change...  and everything.
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Jan 13, 2017
Jan 13, 2017 at 9:05 PM UTC
Martinizing the King