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Avery Sep 2018
I have always been the one who listens
The one who nods while you pour out your pains
Who nods while you complain
Who bandages you when you bleed
I don't mind when you give me your burden for a while
I just don't know how many burdens I can take
Avery Jun 2019
Your eyes seem void of devotion
Emotion drained away like sieving a sunset
Light seeping through the holes in your mind
Until there's nothing left but sand
Avery Sep 2018
My mind is a blank page
Well, not blank
More like a brainstorm sheet
Things I tried to erase, but the imprint will stay there
Memories of when I didn’t think I was good enough
I may not be bleeding but the scar still remains.
Avery Jun 2019
Even with friends surrounding
A reliable future
If you don't accept me
I'll still die alone
Avery Mar 2019
Teach me how to be
Validated in my own body
As alien as those around me
Cause right now my "temple"
Seems to be from the wrong mythology
No.
Avery Feb 2020
No.
Why can't you comprehend
The words even my dog can understand
Avery Oct 2019
Deeper isn’t deep enough
No effort is good enough
No bad thing is bad enough
To ever make it stop
Avery Feb 2020
Who is this "you"
I keep writing
Pouring
Talking to.
Avery Feb 2020
Pin me down
Observe my canyons and rivers
Valleys of motion
Mountains of strength
Map me out
From head to toe, 69.5 inches of
Pure insecurity
Plot me
Graph me
Reduce me
To something I both am and am not
Avery Jul 2019
The doctors all say
Our minds can't remember pain
Why then, do I still remember you
Avery Jan 2019
In
Out
In
Out
Deafening and deaf
Quiet and Loud
Avery Jan 2019
Complaining about their scores
Saying that I'm calm
You're lying
I'm just more experienced at hiding it
Avery Dec 2019
If you don't like me just say so
Avery Mar 2019
I loathe your loving
Your caring caresses as needles
Prancing with abandon
While their victim shudders in fear
Avery Feb 2019
Do you think I enjoy this
Say I lack age to employ this
You do know stress doesn't need a reason, right?
Avery Feb 2019
I've heard skin described as porcelain or mirrors
Sometimes scratched, but smooth and unique
Well I guess I was left to be heated too long
I can already see my distortion breaking out
Avery Mar 2019
Remind me why
We're stuck in this world
Of stressed quietness throughout
Constant motion
And when they try to mention
Age, their sickened view of innocent
Reality, but not really
And feign surprise when they send us to our
Deathbeds
Avery Apr 2019
Tie me to a chair
Dragging with thorns of fire
Away from my one release
That manages still to bring me to my knees
Avery Nov 2018
You say I'm fine and turn a blind eye
When my rashes start to bud
Guess your glasses are so rose tinted
You can't see the blood
Avery Jun 2019
If nobody hates you, you can't be proud
Avery Jun 2019
Your problems don't matter- someone always has it worse than you
Avery Sep 2018
They called her a comedian
A shining star
A talent
They love her paper mask so much
They never want it off
But once they start to notice how the ink will start to blur
Little dots of saltwater
All coming from her
Avery Dec 2018
Silence is a lonely dream
Meant for others, but
Never
For
Me
Avery Apr 2019
You trying to help me is like
Holding me up like a plant to a house lamp
Trying to help
Trying to heal
But naive to the point of stupidity
Dragging to the point of falling
Down
Down
Down
into
Dark
Because that light isn't a savior
It's the one at the end of the tunnel
Avery Sep 2018
I won't sit here and say I don't want fame
Not a word of fake humility meant to draw applause
For tho' I hide away from the spotlight
I won't say I haven't dreamt of the blinding glow
Avery Jan 2019
Gee thanks for your thoughts
Your sympathetic pats
Trying to help by saying nothing at all
"Oh you're just worried"
To hell with that.
Avery Mar 2019
Try to get past my concrete walls
Guarded with flaming angels,
Filled with fake smiles
Try to get past the barbed wire voice
A voice of denial and inflections natural and unnatural all the same
But if you try to get past my porcelain mirrored centre
Shatter me relentlessly
Let me lay like a twisted broken painting
Alone, observed but never examined
Avery Jul 2019
It's soothing
The beads of pure red
Purer than any colored pencil or marker could signify
It doesn't even hurt anymore
Avery Apr 2019
How can heaven be a paradise
If you're not here with me
Concept for a story I'm writing
Avery Jun 2019
Knowing you dance among the heavens
Littered with lace pearlescent and pure
An idol
Can make even the worst days seem closer to paradise
Avery Sep 2018
Some people hate children
They seem too loud and too sensitive
Others have talents
They still have enough childish feeling left in them to identify
To find what they are feeling in their hearts
And voice the opposite
Avery Apr 2019
We gave each other the world
But I wasn't aware
The life that came for me
Was stolen away
Avery Feb 2020
If we were only friends with perfect people
Our lives would be pretty freaking lonely
Avery Jul 2019
It's funny how pain
Only strikes when you don't expect
And never is good enough when you do
Avery Sep 2018
When I was a child, I'd listen intently
Notice what words people laughed at or didn't
So I'd remember to skip those words
So people didn't laugh at me instead
Avery Sep 2018
Everyone knows those jokes
'I want it black like my soul'
'I am so dead inside'
They seem so common nowadays
But I've heard so many from you
Seen the hidden tears through the years
That sometimes I wonder if they're jokes anymore
Avery Sep 2018
Everyone seems so busy
Some more projects, personal or assigned
I feel much less busy
I should probably work, but I have time
What happens when I try to be lighthearted and fail
Avery Sep 2018
Color and sound are far too similar,
They never come without the other.
Instruments, voices, names, notes.
Concerts are entire light shows.
The lime of horns, the flash of drums and whistles,
Entire fireworks shows all at once.
I have always hated fireworks shows.
Voices are strong too.
In noisy corridors where everyone yells, I see brown.
Mud or dried blood color clutters my mind.
I call it ‘brown noise’.
Nobody else understands.
I don’t blame them.
And then there's you.
A baby blue name, a rosy coral voice.
Others have names of sharp yellow or brooding teal.
It differs.
Avery Oct 2019
My power is inevitable
Unfortunately, so is yours
Avery Sep 2018
I remember the day I learned vibrato
The breathtaking, yet pleasing warble
A summer camp where I was told
'Find your own voice'
I used to be so proud of it
My choirs felt otherwise

Sometimes I wonder if I'm like that vibrato
I sound nice, but have to hide in a crowd
Avery Jun 2019
The noise deafening my mind won't leave
No matter how hard
I try to destroy it
It never will die
Avery Dec 2018
Gee thanks for your thoughts
But do you really know
The battles I've fought
The numbers I've lost
All while saying 'I'm Fine'
Ha.
What a lie
Avery Mar 2019
Steel walls crumbling
Remnants reverberating among
Mounds of emotion, eroded in the pang of
Grief
A morphine line of adoration
Loving longer than life
And still
As we sit here and cry
Remembering not what we lost
But of a life behind
Avery Feb 2019
Where I'm from, turbulence is arbitrary and the top layer is a dream
Violence and suicide hidden by pastel pinks and blues
A fragile frosted shell

Where I'm from, dark secrets come from a college in Santa Monica
Where someone drank too much
And no didn't work enough
My dad was in custody of the state 9 months later

Where I'm from, we pride ourselves in Edward Rutledge
Who picked up a pen in 1776
How does a single signature outweigh
A blurred auburn plantation in South Carolina
The sweet scent of fat, and the relatives I'm not allowed to meet
The men under another red, white, and blue flag

Where I'm from, pills are passed out like candy
Anxiety, depression, take your pick
My second cousin, she jumped off a bridge
We don't talk about her

Where I'm from, my cousins are bi-racial
I take pride in myself, and will never fall back
On racism, sexism, words that make my skin crawl
Where I'm from, I'll never stay silent again.
This is a poem I wrote for my English class a while ago. Our prompt was "where I'm from" and every stanza had to start with those words. I am pretty proud of my poem so I decided to post it.
Avery Dec 2018
I want to live
Where the sun never shines
Where the stars litter the endless sky
Serene and never-changing
To live alone
Where my thoughts can never find me
Avery Sep 2018
I've never understood why people like noise
And call it a living spirit of crowds
Middle school bands when teachers leave
A gossiping friend, voice carrying through breeze
Avery Oct 2019
Blue
Like water flowing
Cooling
Saving
Like the color
I always used to see in your
Eyes
Why
Avery Sep 2018
Why
Why should I pour out my feelings
Make my weaknesses too well known
'Cause even though I might feel better, some things
Are better left alone
Why
Avery Nov 2018
Why
Tears streaming
I'm screaming
Nonstop flashes littering
My brain
The ground
Me
Remind me why you think I'm fine?

— The End —