Never been home for more than a few weeks at a time

But when I’m away from you, I never ever  felt more alive

Cause things are never what they seem, to get caught between the scenes and lost within my dreams

Then again, could it just be me or is this all I’ll ever be.......

Visage full of tears,
Abasement due to fears,
Longing and lamentation,
Epitaph and addiction.
Naissance --
Today, I am reborn
Ignify at dawn
Nay, sorry not sorry
Everyone, I am worthy!

All we have in this
life is time,
Everything else we borrow,
Till the day we reach,
Our dead end signs.

We each have different hills, to climb,
Be careful, for mountain slides,
Trying to reach, the summit,
Avoiding all binds.

Decisions change with time, years,
Always be yourself, what you feel,
Others may be totally wrong,
Lazy, full of fear.





                                                                                                                       Tom Maxwell ©
                                                                                                                   4/30/19AD
                                                                                                                   11:59

when you took your life, it was your last thoughts
what will your friends say, how will they act
will the jokes go on or will the petty drama cease.
do you cause a rift in their friendship or do they grow closer because of you.
you’re grandma cries out your name, you’ve never seen her cry
is this how she reacts? Is this what she says
your younger sister, lost, alone, you left her.
she feels sick. she has no best friend.
what does she say but I don’t want to live if you don’t.
How does she react?
Do the teachers at your school care? Do they miss you. What do they say, how do they react. When you’re there one day and gone the next.
How do your cousins who are to young to understand death miss you? Do they remember you? Will they remember you?
How does your mom live with the guilt that she feels it’s on her, she cries out for help.
Is this how you want her to feel? Is that what you want her to say?

When you’re gone they can’t hear you calling out to then telling them you’re ok.
When you left the world you weren’t ok.
When you asked you’re self how would they react, you reminded yourself this was a mistake.