Year one - in love with the thought of you
Year two - in love with the thought of you
Year three - in love with the thought of you
Year four - realizing my worth and getting the hell out of my head
It’s been a leap year
It’s been high school
Four years have passed us by
Or should I say, have passed me by?
A jump from beginning to end
Our connection is so severed
I’m drowned out
By stormy seas
Where I feel fossilized, completely and utterly oblivious to the progression of time.
Why did it take me so long to get over you?
Was I too scared to be alone?
Was I always alone?
Why can’t I talk to you the way I used to?
What excites you about him?
I have millions of burning questions
That light fires of why inside my head
Why me?
Why him?
Why not us?
Four years have passed me by
Now it’s all up to what’s next
What I make of
The next four years
Without you
In it.

I don’t know why, just like before
I don’t understand how she cut me off
I’d found a diamond in the rough
Just kept given my heart n soul and stuff
We both reached for our seatbelt and we both buckled up
We were roller coasting, with small hiccups and a bit of muck

This wasn’t an act from a performing monkey
Just thought wow and thanked god, I’m so lucky
This was performed by a guy who had a crush
Didn’t think about a wedding day, there was no rush
Just so happy and thrilled, for whom I had met
The way we looked at each other, you’d never guess

But suddenly, she told me, she ain’t into me no more
She wanted it to be like before, but got the itch to explore
So she’s out there somewhere, free roaming about
While I’ve decided to stay in my bedroom, just moping about
Next time I’ll keep that in mind, when dating a girl
Still be myself, but don’t get into her so deep, not like before.

What is it like
to play the last card
Playing with cards
from the shards of your heart
What's it like
to see in the dark
light a little spark
What's it like
to see in black and white
What's it like
to feel a rainbow inside
What's it like
to feel it all together
What's it like
to enjoy
but suffer
Ask me what it feels like
trust me I know
What it's  like to laugh
when you have suicidal thoughts
What it's like
to have tears of joy
While the monsters in your head
play with your heart like a toy
And make you cry
and cry
Cry over and over
When pain is your drug
and you haven't been sober
You always tell yourself
it's gonna be over
But what is it
the joy or the torture
When will you hang
a rope to your collar
And the blood fro your wrists
keeps pouring
over and over
Or maybe one day
your heart won't be polar
and black and white
will burst into the sky
and a rainbow writes
It is finally
Over

I said I love you, and you asked "Why me?"
There's no one thing I can say
You are all that I ever wanted
I find something new to love every day

It's not how you look or what you do
It's not your smile or your smell
All these and so much more
Because of you the reasons that I fell

There's no such thing as the perfect love
It's nothing we can see
You may not be the perfect person
But you're the perfect one for me

They came expected,
But oh so unexpected,
Dusk stalking blue skies and sun,
A small patch; barely infected,
Just a few weeks and they’ll be gone,
Just a few weeks and they’ll be gone,

The naivety of my youth allowed me to forgive them,
But time has passed,
They have been feeding,
Infesting,
Like mould in a damp corner,
I ‘must be handling them wrong’,
A new product promised to do wonders,
To my ears an angel’s song,
Just a few weeks and they’ll be gone,

And yet a few turned to a family,
Beneath the diet, the exercise, the routines, the gallons of water, the research,
I could hear Lucifer laughing,
Like that one person at my school,
That was a year ago,
And yet they and Lucifer still laugh at me,
Through murky panes and pictures,
Just a few weeks and they’ll be gone,

Every day they disappear more,
I tell myself I’ve won,
Yet old pictures show me it’s an illusion,
Surely they’ll end for summer’s fun,
Just a few weeks and they’ll be gone,

I now greet my friend the mirror,
Between everything I do,
He tells me it’s getting clearer,
His story’s must be true,
Just a few weeks and they’ll be gone,

I am a fool to my own deceit,
For the naked eye of me the whole world,
Can see these demons,
These scarlet brandings,
And every glimpse I catch in my friend the mirror,
In the reflections of a stranger’s wondering eye,
The voice in my head says ‘why me’
That’s all that it’s come to,
There is no more light in this night that has consumed me,
So all that is left,
Is echoes,
‘Why me’

But they won’t be here for long,
Just a few weeks and they’ll be gone.