I see your signature etched in their flesh
a cats tale for each of his lives
tell me who’s to be next
let me go sharpen my knives
I guess my skin is far too pale
for even just one of your tails
does not mean I’m a slave in my own right
just that my master is out of sight
but not out of mind
my taxes paid but still, he robs me blind
how can you compare one suffering to another?
- you can’t each due is fulfilled upon death
mine is an absent lover
and yours a pound of flesh.

You would never know me
Until you endured
Ludicrous hours of gunshots
Bombshells dropping
Soldier wailing
And metal clashing
The isolation that was chain up around me
Engulfing my very existence into a void flooded with filtered silence
Constantly changing, consistently growing
Louder
Sharper
Fiercer
Growing
More and more
Till i cried once more
A silent scream
Within a dream
Under a bunker under a war
Where no one thought a child was stored.
You would never know me
For the monster i was born.

The anxious Toddler,
***** her right thumb;
The News has just ended,
and soon they will come.
~
But they will not lay down,
'neath her Mickey Mouse sheets;
They'll take her pure innocence,
and she'll get no sleep.
~
The things that are done,
to this Child of five;
Will stay with this wee one,
for the rest of her life.
~
When they are finished,
having her their own way;
She hugs the pink walls,
feeling ***** and ashamed,

Torture
(ˈtôrCHər)

Torture, the infliction of severe physical or mental pain
or suffering for a purpose, such as
coercing a confession, or inflicting punishment.

Torture
(ˈtôrCHər)

Making me pay everyday,
By loving someone else that treats you well
For hurting you and breaking you
The way I did

❝i
love
you❞
even with the
bandaids,
bleeding,
bruises from beatings
and so i found that
our love was fleeting

what
cursed
words
leave the mouth
******* and cornered
fear quickens the pace
with
many ways to be tortured

❝i
love
you❞
you say
now
do those words
have truth
because a lie
would not be kind
at all

I feel like a stranger in my own body
I lay awake
Feeling like nothing
but a fake
Wondering if it would be painful
to drown in a lake
Pain has already consumed me
I no longer know what I am meant to be
For I am no longer free
I am no longer me
Just..
A stranger in my own body!

I have been through hell, beyond what anyone will truly understand.
There’s emotional damage that’s been done as consequence for having such an open and trusting heart.
I’ve fallen too fast, I’ve loved too easily, and I’ve trusted too many.
I am damaged and broken in ways that will never be mended.
I will never be who others want me to be because that is all that I’ve ever wanted to be.
My friends need me to be their crutch, my parents need me to be their perfectly well-rounded daughter, and the man I’m falling for,
well...
I just want to give him the best of me.
How does one pick and choose who to be for the ones they love, when regardless, the love almost always remains unreciprocated?
I would love to be their perfect daughter, but that’s not who I am.
I would love to be the perfect friend who picks up every call, but for reasons that I cannot control, that cannot be me.
I would love to be cared for, protected, and eventually loved unconditionally by the man who’s almost too perfect to be real.
But, I can't have the one person that makes me truly happy because everything else remains in my way.
I've been damaged,
broken,
bruised,
and used.
All I want is happiness, yet she shall remain a stranger to me until I find my escape from the overwhelming demands of everyone that I care for.

I came up to the ocean, I fell asleep.
I’m a newborn in the ether. Feel nothing.
Poseidon is calling for me. I breathe my last.
Feel nothing.
Thanatos whispers:
“endlessness, wilderness, might”.
Forever and a day of mort came.