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Rain 2d
I remember,
Going back to class,
After taking the knife to my skin.
By knife, I mean the stolen box cutter,
From engineering class.
Meant to be used for cardboard.

I remember,
Sitting through class.
Letting that ridiculous long skirt,
Absorb my ****** pain.
Fearing, it would seep through.
And someone would see.
Although it never did.
And no one saw.

I remember,
Hiding in the bathroom.
For three periods in a row.
Clawing at my thighs,
Because the only tool I had,
Was a pen.
So, I wrote cruel things.
Promises, words to end things.
And when I emerged, glazed.
No. One. Noticed.

I remember,
How much I wanted them to see me.
To look me in the eye,
And see my suffering.
But, no one did.
No. One.
My painful memories
Maria May 27
I’m tired of being your shadow.
Wherever you are, I’m near.
I live at your dictation.
I’m chained by your sight here.

I used to live in silence.
To love, to suffer and no words at all.
If it hurts me, I bear without squirming.
If you only knew, how I want to bawl.

I’ve learned to be not certain,
Unheard, unnoted, noneself.
You see, I can be your shadow.
But I’m tired! I want to be myself!
Thank you for reading this poem! 🙏💖
I'd like to thank personally                                                       ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­        
For all the years of misery                                                           ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                     
That you have inflicted on me                                                               ­         
                                                       ­                                                                 ­  While I gave of myself endlessly                                                        ­            
                                                                ­                                                      
You always treated me like ****           
                                                                        ­                                                         Telling me that I deserved
it                                                               ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­          
And yes, it hurt quite a bit                                                              ­                  
                                                                ­                                                
I'm glad to say I am past all of it                                                               ­                                                                 ­                                
                                ­                                                                 ­                
 You really hit below the belt                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                          
Making me hate even myself                                                           ­           
                                                                ­                                      
Oblivious to how I felt                                                             ­                     
                                                                ­                                                  
You lit the fire, watched me melt                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
I absorbed your every blow                                                             ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­      
I didn't have the sense to know                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                
That I could just turn & go                                                               ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­
  and in return I would then grow                                                             ­                                                                 ­        
                                                                ­                                        
Through God's strength & mercy                                                            ­                                                                 ­                                     
                                                                ­                                                  
He had a different plan for me                                                              
                                                                ­                                                  
He opened my eyes so I could see                                                              ­        
                                                        ­                                                        
That you weren't worthy of me                                                               ­ 
                                                               ­                                           
  Looking back on those dark days                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
  I can't imagine why I stayed                                                           ­                                                             
   ­                                                                 ­                                              
  and let a man treat me that way                                                              ­              
                                                  ­                                                                
­  and told myself it was okay                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                      
I have learned from my mistakes                                                         ­         
                                                                ­                                                
That real love is about give & take                                                      
      ­                                                                 ­                                                 
  the next time, that I fall I'll make                                                             ­                                   
                             ­                                                                 ­                  
**** sure my heart isn't at stake
After years of blaming myself, I know it's not me.
Suhei Mar 8
Why it's always late ?
To talk to her
To tell her
To stop her
To ask for forgiveness
To say it is okay

Why it's always late ?
To said
Cynthia Feb 21
To be human means to suffer.
To fight for a permanent fulfillment that never truly existed.

No matter how perfect my roadmap is,
it will never follow that predestined trajectory.

This was a hard truth to accept because
humans have a fragile need to control.
It might be their ego or pride,
but when things don’t bend their way they get enraged.

They become too deeply attached to this impossible idea of perfection.
It’s just that life is so imperfectly beautiful and complicated,
but that’s the best part.

Embracing the unpredictability of life means to acknowledge that…
no matter how hard life gets,
it has a funny way of letting things fall just right where they were meant to be.

This doesn’t justify the cruelty of the world.
The genocides in Rwanda,
war on Israel,
millions dead and injured,
worldwide injustice.

It’s also important to realize that cruelty was not natures fault,
it was us.
We created the evil in the world,
but just try not to be the cause of it.

Learning how to live with cruelty is vital. Realizing that life wasn’t ever meant for death,
but it has it anyways.
It is important to balance these two points.

Accepting the hardships that come with life means living truly at peace.
This also doesn’t change the fact that life is difficult,
it just makes it more tolerable.
Maria Feb 17
I saw you off that day. I exiled you!
You came back to me the very same as a pigeon.
You flew through the opened door deliberately
And wisely as if it should be so. You were sure in.

I packed you off that day. I removed you.
You returned to me like you didn’t even notice.
You closed the door behind, looked steadily
And smiled as if you were looking at an Indian lotus.

I forbade you to suffer privations with me that day.
You as though didn’t get it and stopped at the same thing.
You made fresh tea and stayed by my side that day
And began to make silly jokes to set me kookily laughing.

I don’t let you go! I’ll keep you close to me everywhere.
I’m stuck to you! I’m trapped inside you in whole!
If you didn’t go that day, then stay evermore, for all time.
I love you much! I need none other in my life at all.
Mary Feb 17
Still being attached to you shreds my soul.
I can tell you played a damaging role.
I still feel the blade you left in my chest.
I want to break free, tired of being possessed.

I’m sick of wearing mask of joy.
I see you think that I’m a toy.
I fear nostalgia tricks me here.
And past days suddenly seem real.
my reflections on past love episodes & confusing feelings that have been haunting me.
I was born in a city where the air suffocates
The building groans, its bones cracking under the burned of a thousand years of unspoken regret
This city smells like something poisoned,
petrol and sweat soaked into the earth,
the ghost of rain that never touches the ground.
It seeps into my skin,
As an alarm,
I never wanted to belong here.
The city speaks to me in a dialect of dust and noise
I speak its language too
but my words feel like a borrowed coat,
ill-fitting, awkward on my shoulders.
Even when I strive to make them mine,
they slip away,
elusive and alien.
The chai here burns my tongue,
sharp like an old wound that never healed
and I swallow it down,
Even as I smoke, the air smells of snow and distant mountains
I have never gazed upon
Jeremy Betts Dec 2024
I suffer from an internal judgment
I don't need yours on top of it
With this loser title I'm complacent
Save your beratement
Find some other sucker in their mothers basement
To fold into your statement
Don't play games with a sharp wit
Death is my only engagement
That's the only thing proven permanent
Unconditional love?
Never heard of it

©2024
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