I miss someone I don’t even know.

And as the leaves fall,
I find out I’m youngest no more,
Someone special has taken my role.
I wait for them to bring you home,
your name is all that I know.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

And as I cut my hair short,
I wonder if yours has grown,
if the baby voice has drifted,
soft and unknown,
if your eyes still beg to play
and if your toys still watch you sway.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

And before your first words had formed,
your name was the only thing I could hold,
one street and some harsh words
made us live in two separate worlds.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

I prepare the last gift I can give,
a piece of me to leave a trace.
I know I’ve been naive,
to dream my love could find its place.
Yet I hope one day you’ll know my face,
and see in it a quiet embrace.

I miss someone I don’t even know.

Now I can only wonder,
how much your small hand has grown,
(how long until they tell you I have a headstone)
how many years have passed
(please, forget me fast).

I miss someone I don’t even know.

If one day you reach for me,
remembering someone you barely know,
the little one has turned eighteen,
as small hands have grown,
and your voice became your own.
We will tell the tales untold,
and for the first time,
your brother will be here,
holding the space you leave for me.

And as I await that call,
I’ll remain quiet and cold,
aching for the bond never formed.
Until then,
I will miss you,
my unknown dear.

Your shadow and mine
are one and the same

They fill up with shame

We swallow the tears
of our once young years

so we don't meet eyes
afraid of what we'd find

but my body still aches
with every pain you take