I stand atop your tower
built from words we no longer share—
my soul once peered, admired and awed,
with your star-struck heart
and a knight in shining armor jones—
now I suffer a thousand-yard stare
of a battle-weary tease.
I wait above, hands empty,
wondering if the air between us
has always been this thin.
I watch as the horizon deepens,
stretching from dusk to dawn—
a vigil with no end.
Not a mislaid would-be princess in sight,
never that—but something smaller—
only unemployed, starved dickens
defeating the scorched countryside—
souls eager for your ravaged ***** and spilt milk,
roaming roads where you left behind
dusty footprints and battles long surrendered.
The stones are smooth,
each one perfect in its place.
Your walls press against the clouds,
against my patience—
I am put to shame,
exposed to a dead language.
My mind and body grow rampant—
I dream of what might happen
if the mortar gave way,
if bricks tumbled,
and all this distance crumbled—
to feel the earth under my hands again,
and paint you in moss and ginger,
dust and grit grounding my fingertips—
remembering all that once was.
I am torn—
between the sacred and the scarce,
between walls that claw at the heavens
and the raw ache below.
There is a kind of holiness here,
even in the dirt and dust—
the way it rises, coats my skin,
fills my lungs.
I think of your hands—
how they might feel,
how they left me in shreds—
drenching me in wet dreams.
And though I wait,
against your impossible walls,
I know the truth—
even the strongest tower
will crumble,
even the loneliest heart
will fall to the ground.
I wrote this poem twenty-some years ago, and it needed a revision to bridge the past and present. While I retained much of the raw power of the original, I refined the language and flow to better reflect my evolved voice. The shifts in phrasing, pacing, and imagery now feel more intentional rather than driven by a need to impress. Over time, I’ve come to appreciate poems that are less packed with raw energy or overly polished, favoring instead poems that feel more fluid and immersive. I hope you enjoy it.
