What you think is nothing
And what you thought you think is nothing
It was just a coincidence infatuated fronting
Youthful Glaring
In shades and flimsy
Photograph clumsy
I gave you something
but it was nothing
Let us sit down and sort it
cos I know you will forever love me
but ‘twas nothing
For all is long thing
For you hurt me
doesn’t mean you don’t want me,
but you don’t know you love me
Cos I hunt you.
Don’t be deceived on something that don’t fit you
I pity you
You ugly and you want him
So keep searching on something that is nothing
Well’ there is something I want to tell you,
Uhmn, don’t bother, it nothing
But stop thinking like you are dreaming

Many men wait until Death
is staring down at them
in their beds before
they make the effort
to change their ways.
Then they insist that this
makes their lives meaningful,
as if Death should take pity.
     For me, Death was a woman
and my bed a grave of guilt.

They are stacks of mud--
Splattered filth on the curb
slowly rotting away
like debris of our own path.
Trampled upon leaves
and roadkill rabbits
that pass by our eyes
like the birds of the sky;
Forgotten people of time
and tragedy's aftermath.

Yet these wise wise fools
are happier than I,
the higher and mightier
Begotteb of a son.
Whom dwells in depression
Chained to a society
that feeds off of misery
and regretful deceit;
The comfort and contentment
perceived as luxury and success

For I see them smile
almost a daily occurrence,
as though a new sunshine
is enough of a reason to live zealously.
For I have not unwithholdingly
smiled in countless years,
yet these pitiful souls
have the ability to surpass my own
and thrive in the freedom of their hearts
whilst I suffer in the mundane of wealth.

No I don't want to speak over lunch
Or coffee
Or dinner for that matter.
These words are too much to span
One meal
To span one drink
One bite,
Too heavy to mesh with
The comfort of food.
You never asked if I wanted to just
Hang one night and discuss these things.
And that's where they all go wrong;

I don't want your pity
I want your empathy
Come back to me
When you can share my energy
I don't want to claw at my scars
Only to be looked at as if I'm still
In my infancy
I want to conserve my energy
I'm human,
We can only store so much will
And pain

Let my breath not be wasted
When the time comes,
For if I choose to speak
I speak eye to eye
Entity to entity
And if my judgement of your gaze is wrong -
In that time of supposed synergy -
Know that there is no return for your
Place with me.

I've made myself a mess
I pretend to be a victim
While I throw myself
Into the heart of disaster

I swallow poison
Then wonder why I stumble
I cloud my mind with noise
Then scream out in confusion

I tell myself it's their fault
They caused me all this pain
While wallowing in my pity
Opening up old wounds
So I can convince myself
I'll never heal

There's nothing good left
So twisted, plagued by myself
Except the one spot
The place I've left untouched
In all my self-destruction
Where you reside within
My solitary hope, my haven
The only reason I keep breathing

I feel mute sometimes
I've gone days, even weeks without saying a word
It never used to bother me
Being left alone to observe others
But I'm tired of living as a spectator
It feels like I was casted as an extra for my own life
I know that it's not right
But what can I do
As I stand alone outside this snow globe world
I wish I could pick up a hammer
Shatter the barrier
But I know I could never do it

I'd feel pity for the broken glass

Your eyes showeth truth,
Full of amends;
But your heart is like a stone,
Causing others offence.

Your eyes showeth pity,
But your heart is like a stone;
So what is the use of sympathy,
In your eyes alone?