was a sticky mess dripping slowly
down the broken walls of
what we called home, and i

the ever so buzy bee who hover
to stare from a distance remain
as my gut twists of hunger

for the continued days
of work: measuring the rooms
that would strategically contain

our— my, remaining efforts
in keeping this symbiosis a force
enough to drive through

the blistering storms and past
what you thought was the drought.
but this, is the fallout

where the flowers cease to bloom
and the sun grows weary
to shine on leftovers

of what we called was home
as honey drips ever so slowly
into a painful mess to clean.

When I'm on my phone,
I'd stop what I'm doing
Just to reply to your messages first
And if I'm away,
Your text messages are the first that I'd reply to
But sadly
That's not the case when it comes to you
Since i know you're always on your phone
But I'm the last person you'd reply to
And I'd have to wait til the next time you look at it again in order to get a reply
See that's the difference
You're my first priority
But I'm not even a priority to you

If you'd ask, what's on my mind right now
I'll honestly answer that its you
But you never asked
You never wondered
So i guess that answers my question
Have you ever

Why do I pick you up?
Relentlessly
Energy bleeding
Gasping for relief
No solace in
Your (you’re) gray;
Matter

New Day starts
As the clock strikes at midnight
Yet my heart fails to start
As it lingers to a woman
Who remains in the past.

Why?

Why can't my heart move forward?
Trap in the past which won't last
Casting away the future
Embracing the torture
Stubbornness eats me alive

Yet..

Yet this kind of life never made me sad
Because for every second loving you
Gives me energy to love you more
Even if seeing you with someone else
Drags me to hell... Or not.