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keith daniels Jul 2021
nothing scares me more than me.
it isn't fair,
it aches to be
so full of rancid misery;
twisted psychologically
by tempered hate
- a level stare -
emotion shreds that crackling coat
of grinning, laughing make-believe,
retouched,
refinished,
polished fine
by damaged days in infancy.
I want to love;
I long to breathe
and bare it all,
******* the need to look so in control.
please,
how long until I break, you think?
how long until they see?
those sorrows buried underneath.
nothing scares me more than me.
Words hurt the most when they're true.
Cerasium Jul 2021
As you get further down in life
You start to wonder what the point is
You start to question reality
You start to feel there’s no reason

Like happiness doesn’t exist
And that everyone around you
Is just pretending to be joyful
And expects the same from you

They expect you to forget the past
Forget where you came from
What drove you mad
What caused you so much pain

And I try but to no avail
Life was simple til that day
When the trauma took hold
And destroyed my mind

Now the only salvation
Is the one who caused it
But I’m starting to think
My peace will never come

The longer I wait
The worst it gets
Pretty soon
I’ll be called a loon

Is it too much to ask
For a chance at redemption
To calm the waters
And regain what was lost

I’m starting to think so
The more it goes on
The deeper I go
Into the madness

It won’t be long now
Reality is shifting
Things are moving
The shadows are alive

I’m broken
Far beyond repair
Now my only hope
Is for them to be there
Asominate Jul 2021
There are holes where my heart should be
There are holes in my brain as well
My body tried to make up for the missing mass
And made some of the remaining parts of my brain swell
Sometimes I feel as if I'm nothing more than a chemical child...

(And I've finally returned, I didn't forget my password or anything, just been a bit discouraged, I might be a bit more active now)
Jaicob Jul 2021
Close your eyes.
Turn off the lights.
Take a deep breath-
Let it settle right.
Shake out your shoulders.
Stretch out your legs.
Fill your chest.
It'll be okay.

Take this chance.
Make it right.
Let this calm
Last you the night.
Breathe in,
Breathe out.
Let hate go
With a hearty shout.
It's not yet tomorrow,
So start with today.
Just take your time.
It'll be okay.
Pardon the incoming spam. I wrote a lot at the mental hospital, so I'm gonna be posting it here.
RIH Jul 2021
Tangled strands
In grey matter
I thought it was you,
Them

Deeply embedded
Eternal threading through
No matter how many cuts
I made

“This is just part of me, I guess”
I said at last
Half-believing, hands shining
Patient and surgeon

But it wasn’t you. Or them. Not really.

Tangled strands
Memories made patterns
Which imprinted in grey matter,
Stuck

But these strands
Handled with care
Unravel and turn to wisps
Which, floating,
Take their leave,
Leaving untangled remembrance.
Free.
When I was waist high,
Freckles are angels kisses,
And bedtime seemed a comeuppance
Years old,
I used to wish to grow up in effort to shed my
Child's problems.
Now that the years have raced past,
I've grown into an adult's body
Along with adult problems,
And I wish I hadn't pleaded with the fates
To hurry it onward so.
keith daniels Jun 2021
hush,

hear it?
listen.

all those waves
rolling in,
out,

dragging all you hate,
all you fear,
in tides
offshore.

no pen can trace ink
faster than the sea
can wash it
all away,
promise.

your words are water,
dissolving in the saline sounds
of neap and spring,
rise and fall;
lunar rhythms.

eye the sky
and wait for everything,
the whole god ****** world
to take a breath
and quiet down

so you,
with shaking hands,
might find some peace
below the seabreeze scented winds.
just wait for it.

now,
a moment.
a cosmic pause,
and even nature waits
for what should happen next.

recede.
gradual fade
of throbbing veins,
and wet skin tingles

prickles
with delight
of marine air.

you
are safe;

free.
Playing with the shape of waves.
Format (by word count per line):
1
2,1
3,2,1
4,3,2,1
5,4,3,2,1
4,5,4,3,2
3,4,5,4,3
2,3,4,5,4
1,2,3,4,5
   1,2,3,4
      1,2,3
         1,2
            1
U: NDRESSED
G: EVIOUS
L: UNLOVED
Y: YOU'RE forgetting one more thing...and that's because you're
P: ERFECTLY IMPERFECT
E: VERYTHING YOU ALWAYS NEEDED
R: EASSURED
F: LAWLESS
E: XTRAEXTRODINARY
C: HALANT
T: REASURED & TALENTED
(Read Note)
SELF LOVE: When you feel ugly, remember you're perfect in your own way.
Write down UGLY AND PERFECT and come up with things that you are feeling and what you really are instead of what your negative thoughts appear to say.
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