Sometimes
I wish that you could see
This scared girl inside of me.
I'm not really as I seem.
I'm not tough, strong, or mean.
That isn't me.

This isn't the real me.
I fight by day,
Yet cry at night.
No one can see through
My false identity.

I've been hurt,
As you can see,
So I created
A fake me.

No one ever tries
To get through my shield.
All I want to be is me.

How do I show
What I've kept hidden for years?
How do I show
All the silent fears?

What would you think
If I showed you me?
What would you say
Without my false identity?

Seattle is a sad place
This can be the space I hallow
Courage found to hear my grief
and face the life of hate I leave
Belief enough to begin again
Gaining newness
Making friends with all this blueness
Making time to let it go
Showing doubt passion flows
The moment that nostalgia knows passes by with bitterness
A feeling grows and shakes my bones
Bigger than any memory
Will I learn when my guts churn there is no phantom enemy?
I am not alone
My body will always be my home
Craving direction I follow the vulnerability of connection
Sobbing
Terrified to be seen in reflection
I reach out and embrace rejection
Accepting neglect of my better self, my soul ascends detection

They say,
"Ignorance is bliss."
Do you know why that is?
You're unaware of all the things you've "missed."

Things already in existence,
Things already happened,
Things happening;
That which is existing.

All that exists.
To reduce it,
We're all learning what 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 is.
Learning ignorance, decoding from it wisdom.

So what is it to be knowledgeable?
What is there that is knowledgeable?
What is knowledge?
Does intelligence exist?

Tongue at your thighs,
staring deep in your eyes.
Tasting peach oceans-
warm, full of lies.

Whispering sweetness, legs starting to shift-
feeling the rhythm, tension uplifts.

Kiss on your neck, sweet- no reason to hurry,
stroking you slowly, lost in your body's flurry.

A breath on the ear, hands on your waist,
feeling your moans like a song made of grace.

Your arch, your song-
why can’t we belong?