You're a piece of my dad
Sometimes I find him in your laugh
But then your smile goes crooked and your "bugs" act up again
You find clarity for a moment and then your thoughts become distorted
Was the habit to hard to break or did you think the promises I made for you were fake  
You always told me every day to never give up why can you not wake up
Dad, Jake.. ?
What's your name ?
I feel like we're strangers and I feel like your love was fake
You took a piece of my sister's away and for that I'll never forgive you
Can't you see your own ****** mistakes
You're blind and they were right you are a snake
You fried your brains and I'm afraid it's to late
I can't save you unless you want to be saved

I was falling apart just like those dry autumn leaves that fell from the trees into your hands.
Oh! how I wished your hands held my broken pieces, just the way you held those leaves.
Oh! how I wished you sew my broken pieces together with the warmth and passion of your love.
Oh! how I wished all of this was true, but your love; it was just a dream, just an illusion, just a fantasy playing in my head.

I'm broken
Worthless to my owner
No care for me at all
They think I was born to fail
Send me away I'm a sinful
Lock me in hay with no bail
Inject me with lead you'd all love if I were dead.
Cut out my eyes listen to me wail.
Tear me to pieces cause I'm frail.
**** with my feelings it's okay it's a game
Soon I'll be hangin like other *****.
Slave to no man but a noose.
Before death I'll be screaming you'll love that tune.
I'm lit like a flame but burning in pain.
Put knives in my brain.
I'll be sharp in my head.
Deathwish is what I want.
While I'm bleeding to death.
My death will be praised.
They all I've never been sane.
I cry myself to sleep.
At my funeral don't weep.
You cut me wide open
So 'll get a late abortion.
You played with my emotions
More than with female sheath
You took away my oxygen
When you lied to me
I know you never liked me though
I always knew you were a fraud
You said you're queer when my heart speaks
So now all girls just disgust me.
I was never good at lust
I get confused with loving

i've tried to escape you,
but you keep coming back.
tormenting me,
playing your little games.

i just want a taste
of real love,
of who you really are.

you hide in the dark,
even in the light.

i don't want this fake love,
i want true, imperfect love.
you can't give me that.

What is it about love that makes people so obsessed?
Love is a dangerous addiction
once felt entering your body, nothing can replace it

But was that love?
Or child plays dissembling ever puzzle piece inside of your body

He'll tell you he loves you
Just so that you won't feel guilty inviting him in
Body on body
His hand on your skin
Was this love?

Blinded behind what romance means
He took advantage because you were just a teen
Small and innocent
Craving affection from one who could provide
Not knowing he'll be the one to steal your precious innocence on the inside

He'll never know he is the reason you cried
He'll never know that every night you died

You felt like you were stabbed in your heart with a blade
Drowning in blood from every part of you body
From your toes to your brain

You felt betrayed
He never loved you
You had been played

Regrets were made
Not that you loved too much
But because he was an unwelcome, uncontrollable love that never stayed

-AB

They are a reflection
flashing against me fast.
They are seeking attention
from the faces of my past.

The demons are here
and looking for a ****.
I might die tonight
If I wouldn't stay still.

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj