she tries so hard to please others
when all that matters in the end is that she pleases her Heavenly Father and brings glory to His name all else will fall away
i watch from afar
all my old friends having fun and growing without me some remember my ghost but others have no recollection that i even existed all those pictures remind me of the times i had this comforting sadness im happy to see my old friends yet here i am half the world away watching from a distance, as they make new friends and new memories. i can't go back, but i can't seem to move forward. so here i lay me and my friend sadness.
breaking everytime you leave me on read. i know you're busy, but i remember a time when you'd reply within seconds. did i mess this up? what happened? and can we please go back to those summertime dreams?
leaving everything behind
has been torturing my mind for what feels like forever some days i want to stay an eternity and never let go of these things and other days, i just want to fly away and get it over with. yet here i am standing still watching, waiting, as the clock keeps ticking by in wait for that day to come.
i crave love so badly,
the soft touch of a hand on mine, sweet eyes gazing into my soul. yet, i fear it. every guy who shows interest is repaid with silence and distance. though i might feel the same, the prospect of love scares me.
my mind and feelings are a mess right now.
i long for the body i used to have.
strong and fierce. obsessing over my weight and the food i consume comes far too easily. can't be mentally stable and healthy, can't be happy and healthy. no solution.
that Se function in INFJs though... OBSESSIVE.
they all tell me
i'm soft, calm, a peaceful presence, someone to turn to for comfort, a shoulder to lean on, a warm hug, selfless, inviting, deep, happy, and so much more that i only get a glimpse of once in a million moments.