Here I lurk
Clutching my shadow
In my fists
It shivers, shrivels, sighs
A flame shushed to silence
On its ashen throne
Here I grasp
Grasp the oozing, burning night
That drips down my fingers
A palm beneath a palm I place
A palm beneath another
It the creamy tiles kisses
And will come to me no more

A rumble wobbles
around the room
Of laughs and talks
And talks
However do I mingle
In these faceless folks?
However do I fathom
All these massless worlds
Orbiting around ecstatic tongues
That birth them
Birth them on and on
Birth them meaningless, and birth them blind

I think,
Maybe when the flood dies out
I think,
Maybe then I will see
Pick up the shells this land could not drink
And read the tales preserved
In their wounds
Maybe the drunken ghosts
Serving all these brightly dressed drinks
Will approach me too—

Not yet though
Not yet

I pull little hymns out of my throat
Roll them around in my mouth
It is there they sway,
There they wilt

A gaze chained to my eyes
Wanders about
Like an injured fly
On one face it rests
On one chuckle stumbles,
A crack skipping down the wall
A high-pitched laugh blooming
In the corner
There is a bleakness, believe me
In this world

A bleakness so pitiless and rotten
Its stench covers all that is born
All that is not
All—
There is a bleakness
And I often mistake it for my own
But I do not now
It is there in every eye
In every corpse hanging between the ribs
It grows up like a sturdy ****
On arms and legs and
Bones
Up and down the aisle it flows
In this classroom twinkling
with childish mirth

Up and down
It pats heads and laughing cheeks
It is there
It is there
And will not still
Will not stir either

I think,
I must warn them
These energetic faces trying
to resurrect joy
From the flesh of stories all skinned alive
Warn them
I must, I must
But the words pile up
And floods pile up
One upon the other thousands
And I lose myself somewhere

The chatter blends in with the chortle
And I cannot tell
The shadows imagined
From cloaked figures swaying around
I would warn them, believe me
Warn them I would
If only
If only I could grasp hold
Of this darkness
That mimics me everywhere I go
Ghost of a black lamb
I once sacrificed for
A purity I loved to violence

And longing never became
A shackle so well

I think,
maybe when the flood dies down
I will breathe,
I will breathe maybe
Here we lurk
A slave upon a slave rests
A slave beneath still
Two ghosts I birthed,
Two lambs opened up,
One will not love me
And one will not not—

Anxiety
Insecurity
Self hatred
Fueled by staying inside
By never seeing people
By wearing a mask

Full face
Half face
No face
Hide behind the cloth
The screen
The walls

Privacy
Intimacy
Fear
Leave me anonymous
Unseen
Invisible

you appear in my dreams
and the moment i open my eyes
you're faceless in my mind

do i know you?
that depends
i always forget how the dream ends

you're not forgotten
but why can't i remember?
you're like a dying ember

spark your flame!
show me who you are
tell me of your scars

i still cant remember
my head is aching
my heart is breaking

all you'll be is
faceless
as time passes

i'll never know
who am i to interfere?
to me, you were a man who was once here

faceless
over and over again
til the next dream then

lamyos ng dampi ng ginaw
sa tuyong balat
ng nilikhang kanina pa ay
naghihingalong kumakampay
sa gilid ng dagat
sa gitna ng disyerto
sa loob nitong lunsod
na kayraming pangako
bigo
nilalasap ang pabagu-bagong
init-lamig ng malungkot
na ihip ng hangin-usok
may ibinubulong na mensahe
nagmula pa sa kung saang daigdig
pumapaimbulog sa kalawakan
parang naglalaro
tumatawag
nakikipag-away
nanunukso
naghahagilap ng kaunting pansin
na wari ba ay kasing kulay
ng bahaghari
kahit na walang inilimos na tubig-ulan
kahit na sadyang kaydilim
ng sanlibutan

I smile onto the darkness as it watches me
The dark that some would run or even flee

I laugh as I mingle in my friend's presence
He tells me a joke that others would dismiss as nonsense

But in daylight I'm under my person feeling lonely
She hugs she laughs with her friends smiling brightly

I tried to smile as if I had lips
I tried to sway as if I had hips

I mimicked her as she waved but then I realized
I'm not mimicking anything until I am with my old friend

I am but a shadow with no face only black
I am a shadow with no control under daylight I'm a wrack

But With in my old friend, dark, I am free
I could smile, laugh and scream as if I'm a banshee
The only problem is that you can't and never will see

#Psyco

Sometimes I wonder
Who sees me for me
And who just sees a person

Does it make it easier for them
To target a faceless person
Rather than a ******

Is that all I am
A ******
Just a messed up person
Whose brain forces harm

What makes me so different than you?
Than the normal ones

Where are the ones who arise for us
Have they all disappeared?
Left us for death?

The Faceless Man

He walks the world without one,
but could borrow any face.

I could guess the colour of His skin
but He doesn't belong to any race

As soon as He's within your grasp
He disappears without a trace

And you can only sense His smile
As He slips into your place.