Exam room.
Air as still as dead,
Then I hear it:
Pencil.
R o l l i n g off the edg
e -
But the person catches it just in time.

I sigh in relief.

I am studying.
I am dying from exams.
I should get some sleep.



Don's you just love exams?
I don't.
I hate it.

Dear God of Study,
I put my brain in your hands
Help me pass all my exams!

I'll be good all year round,
help my GPA from crashing on the ground.

All I need is a curvy C,
because that's what'll get me my degree.

Help.

Exams:
How wonderful they are
Because in the moments leading up to them
I’m ******* happy
A fantastic sense of euphoria
Something I haven’t felt in forever
Because teachers stop teaching
A few days before
Easy reviews and exam prep starts
And I get to relax
Nothing new to learn
Just old things to remember
Then they actually happen
And I remember why they’re so horrid
Cramming the night before
When your friends tell you
The test wasn’t as easy as you’d hoped
And remind you that no amount of prep could prepare you
Exams are ******* hard
Don’t you dare try to tell me otherwise.
I cry myself to sleep after hours of staring blankly at a full sheet of paper
Eyes wandering but not focusing
My mind turned to madness
Euphoria gone all too soon
And I’m back to hating myself
Wanting to quit and give up everything
But I can’t
Because as everybody says
It’s just exams
Like they don’t realize the anxieties and pressure that come from those four letters
I hate them
And the worst part is I know I’ll survive them
And have to suffer through again next year
And the year after that
Until the year that the exams conquer me
Absolutely destroying me inside and out
And I guess I’ll just wait for that to happen
Hopefully sooner rather than later.

Study.
Yeah, that'll get you places.
As the multitude of students waste away hours,
Studying, stressing, vomiting, anxious,
The hope that we'll eventually reach our dreams,
Yeah, that's barely what keeps us going.

We know our parents are pushing,
Always pushing,
For us to have the life they dreamed of,
But never had.

Do they ever think?
Does it ever cross their mind,
That maybe we don't want that?
Or maybe we want to make them happy,
So we push ourselves farther than we can go,
Just to keep them thriving,
For the last few years of their lives.

So instead of them checking on us,
Making US happy in our own life,
We are pushed, told,
"Study Harder" and "It's worth it!",
But I get the feeling,
Even with a university degree,
I'll still end up depressed, anxious,
And be worried about the future,
And with a debt that will just keep growing.

Cheeks flushed,
Heart rushed,
Words pushed
Down our necks

Force fed garbage
We don't want to hear
*******- flowing through our veins
Like mud
Chewing on bitter cud
But we need it,
We need to learn it -
Memorise the words
So white men can put us in
Boxes.
Tick
or
Cross.

I want to fly.
Fly away like a little bird.
To Neverland.
And never look back.

Fly to a place,
Which only the clouds can see me
And only the clouds is what I see.

I will take myself there
Without hesitation.

Not even a spaceship will see me.
I will float.

But in reality I'm heavy,
So I will fall.

Fall so hard
I won't feel anymore.