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Jayda James Jun 27
Drowning in tears
Sinkin in pills
I wonder how great happiness feel
I use to get the feeling
The feeling that i may not make it
Smiling what a fake grin
How is it that you live with yourself knowing what you did
How is it that i have to take my life just to get peace
While you live on and I feel deceased
How dare you take everything i hold close
Then act like you right
When no one knows
To unlock secrets and began my life
I let you go off the chain
Knowing i still suffer
Knowing i still cant get past
I let you dog me out and still pass
I let you strip me down in every way
****** my mind and take my soul out of my chest
I wanna hurt you like you did me
But im not that heartless
I have every reason but i let you go cause i need peace
I hope you happy that deep down inside you destroyed me
I still wonder why I let you slide
The damages i have inside can never die
I hope they never ressurect
Cause i dont know how much life I got left
I dont show this part of me often but this is me breaking away from the older version of me
Naeem May 19
Off the top of my head
When ever I think back all I see is dread
Mindlessly roaming the days
Passing the time as i slowly fade
Away
Into the night I dissapear
Never seen to been seen
As if I was ever seen in the first place
Serendipity Apr 28
I used to be someone
whose life goal
was to do something
that would impact
the world.

Soon I found solace
in disappearing as a whole
and realized
the biggest impact
I will ever make
is
leaving.
I enjoy my fantasies of starting over in a rainy city with rainboots ****.
trf Jul 2018
youthful years, now reduced
when right angles were obtuse
find my path of lost tracks
feathered freight in the caboose

falling sand, hour glass
shades the moon from the cracks
'neath the back porch lies the dog
who howls when sand runs out

whispered winds
don't you lie
and try to save my sins
whispered winds
don't you lie
don't you die

dreary days, losing weight
i call out but cannot say
what is wrong, i'm ok
let's talk the ******* fake

fever chills, alone to face
california king's embrace
i stretch out, all my regrets
and dream of an escape

whispered winds
don't you lie
and try to save my sins
whispered winds
don't you lie
don't you die
September Roses Jun 2018
Aghhhhhhhhhh
Why is everything so co.mpli.cated.
        Why is nothing how it should be

Nothing good lasts for ever
well it seems to me like nothing good lasts a ******* second

Everything is
Spiralling
Out
Of
Control
          
         Everything was good a week ago
    A month ago
    
Ok maybe not good but better

         Because this ******* life has
        given me the ******* lemons
And although I'm used to ***** lemonade
it's like life still enjoys pelting me with the leftover ones
      
          Until
        I want
    To disappear
Go away
Josh Cheshier Mar 2018
If this is a safe space, then let me speak honestly for a moment

Because I’ve been wanting to disappear, and I’m trying to decide if I should vanish all at once or if I could let myself slowly start to fade away.
Taking my time with the goodbyes, as I’m hugging family members I’m watching my finger tips regress to their first knuckle joints behind their backs.

Going to shake an old friends hand and realizing I’m only able to offer them a short section of my forearm.  They try not to be rude about it, exchanging nice to see you’s and hope you’ve been wells.

Once I couldn’t see my arms anymore and my legs began to fade I finally felt fearful and maybe even regret..
I wanted to come see you before it happened for good, before there was nothing left to see. I can feel you looking for the parts of me that should be there, no hands to hold, no arms to hug you, my torso was starting to slim and slip away like grains of sand through an hour glass.

I felt my breath tighten, you don’t expect to feel your last pieces fading but this was hurting much more than I ever thought it would and I couldn’t let you see me like that so I ran, and I ran far.

Just as I feel like I’m drifting off I hear you call for me and I realize this was a mistake and that I never was meant to disappear or fade away, I was never meant to say good byes, at least not so soon, maybe not now and maybe not ever.

Turns out vanishing all at once always was an acquired taste and I had no pallet for it, there are no second thoughts. At least I’ve began to be okay with the process, the gradual fading has brought me comfort, but I could never leave here.. At least not without saying, goodbye.
The light goes out
And we disappear

I can cry crystal tears
I can have a hundred fears
I can stand up for what I'm
But control my mind no way
I can break without notice
I can struggle everyday
I can search for the help
But I don't ever think
That this girl will ever help
She can rip my heart
As it was a piece of art
And I let her do it every day
Just go on, I say it's okay
Echoes Of A Mind Oct 2015
We used to laugh the whole time
I was your friend and you were mine
But slowly the laughs dissapeared
Untill they no longer appeared
We went in different directions
Found a new place and made new connections
And though I miss you all the time
I'm fine as long as you still smile.
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