we heard them talking
about a meteor shower
expected later that night
highly anticipated
set to accompany
the rust red supermoon
that we caught
following us home

lay down upon blankets
a meagre effort
to provide at least
a little comfort
while we witnessed
this astral magnificence
the significanceof which
none of us was certain
childishly imagining
a spectacle from
the dazzling of shooting stars
trailing tails like fireworks
pointing in wonder
appearing briefly
before burning out

instead
we found ourselves staring
up at one of those
countless  spots of white
slowly
unenthusiastically
     drifting across
          the stratosphere
it could be a meteor
maybe just an aeroplane
or simply a twinkling
trick of the light
yet still we watched
without excitement
without direction
without relevance

The crawling angel of your eyes
Is a staggering thought to my soul.

Pondering the inverse
relationship between
desire and disappointment:

After many lessons,
Anxiety answers Hope,
an I for an i.

The I formulates desire;

The i learns the folly
of attachment, and instinct
holds sway, a balloon

filling with
oxygen, a balloon

popping.

You say 'Here it is',

'goodbye', and you go, away --


from the restaurant.

It's funny how people say for others
"Don't judge a book by its cover".
Honey, I've read the whole series -
I still want my refund,
Believe me, that story never got interesting nor pretty.
It was comfort when you're feeling down,
It was home when no one else was around,
It was fun, when you needed a good time to laugh.

Why I want a refund you'd ask?
The magic forest isn't just pretty fairies and unicorns, right?
So was this book.
Cover ain't pretty, but we don't judge it - we give it a try.
Yet, under all the magic,
there's something scary, that could make you lose your pride.
Ugly witches, goblins, trolls,
but isn't the forest also their home?
Story can't always be bright,
But when the dark consumes all the light,
the book is no longer your anchor.
The pages contain ungly spells that make you feel like you're reading something else.
One of the trolls probably tried to trick me - he succeeded.
Can't believe once I've said this book was everything I needed.

Could be the troll,
could be the narrator,
could be just me,
but the comforting fairy tale,
is no longer what it used to be.

And I believe you feel the same way as me,
as this was our first and last journey,
cause the story got way too ugly so we both decided that it's just not worth it.

So, you see, I didn't judge it before,
nor will I do it now.
Yet, I'd like to bring it all back,
wishing I've never read that series nor reach its finale.

As a kid I remember always wanting to make you proud or smile or even laugh.
As I've grown I only found disappointment.
I could make you smile, I could make you laugh, but I couldn't teach you.
As I watched my sister grow up I could only see her disappointment in you grow.
As I tried to push you to be more then just a voice on the phone to us you pushed us away even further,
Only leaving me to do my best for her, every single time you fell short.
I got over how you are early on in my life,
But I watched her give you every chance in the world, all you did was disappoint her.
I watched you live your life, and she watched you too,
And all she wanted was to be more apart of it.
My heart broke every time she had something to show you she was proud of and you weren't there,
You made it clear if what we do isn't something you like you won't support us even if it was better for us.
You've made it clear we can't speak to you, not without you getting drunk first and arguing after.
So as we've grown you've left us in disappointment,
As we've grown more open minded to the world you've only shown that you'd rather stay closed off to it, and us as well.
So now on father's Day my sister wishes me a happy father's day,
And I wish none of my own.
For all I am is a disappointed son.

To a father that only needed to listen and be there.

Sitting on the ***** ground,
while staring to the playground.
I've been waiting for you too long,
yet you never came along.
I lower my pride,
just to be by your side.
Even if trials will come,
I'll still choose to walk with you in the aisle.

But then, my hopes has been shatter.
and turned into anger.
Is this the love that I want?
Is this the love that I need?
To be pitied?
Maybe, yes!
Maybe, not!

I've been careless,
and now I'm no longer his princess.
I deserve what I tolerate.
Cause I know, he always makes me feel discriminate.
And I let those painful words hit me.

I waited too long,
to realize that this is wrong.
The love that I dream
isn't a moonbeam.
Instead, it is a shadow of grief.
Whom I belief.

Expectation destroys everything
All of you should know that
After all, I am a human being
Not an AI-programmed robot
How much can I manage at a time?
You expect me to work
And aggressively at that
Handling five mandates at a time
When you very well know
That even three is not a walk in the park
You expect me to exercise
When I barely have time to complete my work
And on top of that
You expect me to eat
You expect me to drink
And you expect me to sleep
Like every other human being
Do you even hear yourself?

Expectation destroys everything
What do you get
When you expect too much from people?
Disappointment
Do you really want that?
I repeat, I am a human being
Not an AI-programmed robot
Put yourself in my shoes
And see if you can achieve
What you're expecting me to achieve
Of course, you love to say
That I need to be flexible
Well, I certainly do my best
But you need to know
That, sometimes, even your best is not enough
When you're up against time
Because time is not flexible
And will never be

Expectation destroys everything
I hope you will realise this some day
Because, if you don't
Then it will be your loss, not mine
Until then, here's to expecting
And getting disappointed