Not easy to walk through a
meadow full of flowers
when they look dead
and it's as if you can see the
bones of the dead
reaching for the sunshine
that the daises aren't sharing
as I collapse towards the graves
part of me wishing to be a flower
and the other wishing I was
colds stone with some skull and bones
with my smile washed away
but roots of nature growing in me
my tears becoming lost in
the ground
because the flowers need it
but I need to stop feeling like
a dull piece of grass
I need to be a flower
but I'm just going to be
another sad story
lost in the dirt
that the flowers need to thrive
and another lost soul
will kick me around
but we all end the same
and we'll all breathe the same
dirt one day
and it won't be easy to walk through
a meadow full of flowers
when they look dead

I used to see beauty
And find comfort in the stars
But of late
They have lost their luster
Why should I dwell on ***** of fire
Thousands of light years away?
No longer can specks of light comfort
My tortured soul
No longer can I believe
There is a God watching over me
I have lost too much
And been cut too deeply
To put faith
In the night sky
For once the stars filled
My heart with wonder
But now they fill my heart with cold
Because when I look up at them
All I can see is your smile
All I can taste are your lips
All I can feel are you gentle hands
All I remember is a clear autumn night
Stargazing with you
And these memories destroy me

People swear and people lie
Grow up thinking you're one of a kind
People laugh and people cry
We all have scars we try to hide
She has a past and he has no future
Wish that your skin was a little smoother
Trace the lines with a blade
Starring at the sky that has started to fade
People swear and people lie
Wonder when it's my turn to die

I sometimes think about beeing someone else
How would that be?
But I'll always be stuck in this body
I just hate me

Isn't it sickening this life we live?

Every day someone dies of suicide,
Every day someone loses their mind,
Every day someone cries,
Every day someone looks for something they can't find.

Dear pills,
I eat you everyday
Sometime to take away the pain
To take away what my life has become
Please oh please just let me be numb
I never wanted to end up this way
After watching my mom pop them day after day
Oh dear pill please take me away
I'm too fat, annoying sad all the time
Why is this pill making me happy I feel skinny, loved, so alive
Ill just take one because my tooth hurts
Then another for my headache
Oh wait my backs is sore
I forgot what Is hurting thanks for taking away the pain
Oh dear pill I'll have another just in case it comes back
' no I'm fine I promise'
Is a lie I will say
' babe its not candy'
Is what my man will say
He doesn't understand the feelings that haunt me day after day
The depression will always stay
'Just give me one more
I promise I will stop'
Tomarrow I won't need them
Tomorrow I'll be strong
Well tommarrow has come
I'm no longer feeling numb
My arms,legs,back,head,hair hurt
I don't want to move
My heart is racing my eyes are throbbing
Please dear pill I need one more to get through today
I'll give you anything you want
Money,love, my heart and soul
Just please take it, take it all
Just take away my pain.
Dear pill why did I take you
I feel so ashamed
I'm toxic to my loved ones
I don't know why they stay
They don't no how bad this habit is
Because I say I'm okay
I need help please help me
Please dear pills oh please just go away.

I need to stop this over indulging of thoughts..
I think too much.
my mind races with thoughts that have gone too far.
I eat too much.
my body image is disillusioned and I torture myself every day because of it.
I speak too much.
I do all the wrong things
at all the wrong times.
I'm an unlucky vurtue sent into this world to suffer.
and if I'm not quite sure how much longer I can continue this battle