His words are slow as
he tries to command
them into coherentness,
they're still slurred.
The lines are blurred,
like wet ink running
down on paper he's
messy messy messy
He says he loves me
the words come out
tangled but enthusiastic
there's no pain in them.
He says it again,
his heart must feel unguarded,
he must feel comfortable
to say it again without pause.
"Are you drunk?"
yes, I'm very intoxicated.
That's to be expected this
**** ain't complicated.
Do I take advantage of
his drunkenness and
ask him to continue
saying he loves me?
Or do I wait until he's dry,
tell him I love him, expect
silence as my reply, and another
piece of my heart broken?
Because when he eventually
says it back, his voice will crack.
And I'll feel Guilty for
wanting to be loved like that.
It's not his fault, I'll say,
Everybody can't say it back.
Be patient, I'll remind myself.
I'll remind myself, I'll remind, remind
He only loves me when
he's inebriated. He's drunk
in love with me, how the hell
did this **** happen?
As I listen to him snore over
the phone, I know I'm in his
dreams. And maybe he's sober
when he says he loves me.
