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I pulled the flowers from their roots
letting the thorns dig into my flesh
that had grown rough
a hard shell
the thick blood was a blatant reminder of my mortality
something I could often forget these days
as I make my home in a house of shambles and rotting wood
numb and empty and forgotten
lost to those I once loved
my pleas for warmth fall on deaf ears
they couldn't carry the pain with me
they could smile in the midst of death
but I embraced the fact that this would all end
a curse for knowing the truth, I suppose
I plucked the petals of yellow roses
and mixed my blood with the soil full of decomposition
burying myself under the blanket of the earth
letting it swallow me
digest me
this blob of rock among stars will carry the pain of knowing the truth
that life does not last forever
that the heat of blackness was our home before our birth
a comfortable universe
so when we die we will return into the darkness
unaware of ourselves
taia May 2016
i used to pray once
when i believed in winged men
and life after death
Are you out there?
Are you listening?
Can you hear me?
Cause I need to see
That's there's someone
Who will answer me
And that the world is in your hands
Oh God please help me
Don't just diminish things
I can't see clearly
Or how I used to see
You're fading faster
From my memory
Oh God please take me in your hands
I need to know that you're out there
I need to know that you still care
I need to know there's a home up there
And that it's not a hopeless dream
Can you hear me?
Are you listening?
Because he's in my head
And it hurts me
God I know you
Won't desert me
So I'm reaching out my hand
Dating an atheist when you believe in a higher power.
ConnectHook Apr 2016
∅☢☯✰✿⚥∅☯✰✿☠☯✰

Religion, you harlot and ****** of the masses

I smell the stagnation you bring upon earth.

Gold becomes lead, in stained roseate glasses

diluting, corrupting, negating its worth.

Hierarchical structure and pseudo-anointing

seem holy— but prove antithetic to Christ

whose transparently sure apostolic appointing

began a new age, and sufficed.

I renounce you, religion. Your temples lie fallen…

the future arises from ruins, ever new.

Mere human unrighteous momentum must stall

when the truth spins around into view.

He was scorned, he was vilified; slain for your sin

Abrahamic philosopher, healer and friend

yet perceived as demoniac right to the end.

His beginning is here in your heart. Never fear:

Dead religion must perish for true love to win.

Hermeneutics imploding—His coming is near

a poem a day for NaPoWriMo2016

www.connecthook.wordpress.com
Kay Ireland Apr 2016
There is a low sheet of fog in the field across the way
And I am reminded of that afternoon.
We all remember it, but we don’t speak of it.
I dug up the grass with my bare feet
Running full-fledged somewhere, nowhere.
The holes served as a reminder during the weeks to come.
I collapsed and beat the ground until my fists
Were bruised and I had frightened the birds away.
I screamed out a sob but made no sound,
And I prayed for the day to end
And for you to survive it.
I begged and pleaded under my breath
In a language I didn’t understand.
I stared at the blank sky until I sensed darkness,
And went back inside
To my bed and my photographs and a phone call.
That was the day that I ceased believing in God.
john shai Apr 2016
I never stopped believing
I just stopped believing in you
You can stop grieving
My soul is fully connected

To the laws of logic and art
I say I feel more and more
My essence and matter shall never part
The logic of abstract words

And then

Upon a crisp cold morning
I am alone
I am mourning
I curse this logic

For it is my master
And I its slave
How I envy the naive
john shai Apr 2016
if the universe God played in
like a Child
the stars like Fireflies
he'd catch them
put them on a Shelf
Feed them
leave them undisturbed
while he fell Asleep
the universe follows the laws of the jar
She wears a sterling silver lie on her finger,

A Christmas gift, unintentionally leading her into Fraud,
months after the wrapping paper had been torn away.

Never gifted with piano fingers, hers pulsated with words waiting to pour through her pen

Having passed faith tests with flying colors,  she looked at the rounded Christ less crucifix, Jesus replaced with fashionable jewels,

She believed it was a medal for coming out alive and in faith

Little did she know that the test was a mere three months away

Not unfamiliar with temptation,

She knew her weakness,

Knowing herself only to be human,

Seeing the ins and outs of her fragility,

Still pushing onward into hope,

Bordering on the suburban developed atheism, but always landing on the grassy faith.

But as one who was too old to be young forever, there was one whose failure

Would drag her out to the desert littered in nihilism.

She feared how at home she felt there,

Seeing her reflections not in any oasis, but in the land that once held such promise

But had been drained of breath and water

The dry ground being undistinguishable from her feet,

too tired to keep going, too broken to stay,

Ignoring that lone piece of metal, glaring from her fingers,

Being covered in the dried and drained land,

Hiding away the lie that was stuck to her,

Fingers swollen with the untapped sap,

Too thickened with sorrow to be drained easily,

Growing into her skin, scarring over,

Ingrown faith, digging itself under her skin,

Unavoidable metal in a desert so bleak,

A Medal that brought prior pride

Now a blood clot in vain of surviving.
MC Mar 2016
With everything I do
I will have the doubt in my mind
That the things I am doing
Are just to fill time

My empty accomplishments
My empty wall of fame
My empty heart beating
My empty full name

I lie awake tired
I lie here distressed
I lie here, my mind racing
My whole life a mess

I'm counting the hours
I'm counting the days
Until I can give up
This timeless charade

Dear god I'm not happy
Dear god I'm a fraud
Dear god are you listening?
Dear god, I've wrote you all along

When will this be over?
When will I feel full?
When will my life become everything everyone said it would?
When will I feel sure?

Dear god if you're listening
Dear god hear my plea
Dear god I'm begging you
Why won't you answer me?
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