all I wanted was a kiss
a kiss I had craved since the last
I hadn’t even asked for much
just a moment with you
and no one else
nothing even outrageous
just an innocent second of love
with no prying, teasing eyes
a time where I could take you in
feel you and all your affection

I buried my head in your shoulder in vexation
closing my eyes and instead relishing your warmth
and yearning for a day with no interruptions
where I can focus on you, and only you
because all I want is your love wrapped in a kiss

can we dream about the future,
without living in the now?
can we please just fantasize,
about what we want to be,
instead of where we are,
will you dream with me?

"If it has nothing to do with me
Then why should I even be here?"
That sounded far more narcissistic
Coming out of my mouth. But
I meant exactly what I said, and
I knew exactly what I meant.
I knew exactly what I meant.


-
By Aleksander Mielnikow

Walking into the building:
Cold parking lot,
****** music blaring from that lifted truck,
People honking;

Glass doors,
Short, insufficient eye contact,
"Good morning!" from the lady who guards the door
With a laptop and a forced smile;

Quick strides,
A pinball-like dance,
Yelling, screaming, arguing, sometimes fighting,
Fake greetings and meaningful silences;

A tiny bubble of social-media-manufactured society,
Without the trials and tribulations
That make one human
Or the experience that makes one sensible;

I can't ******* wait to graduate.

sometimes I find it hard to talk to you
so I make lists in my sleep,
of something I could say.
but still I come up empty.
what is it about you?
I can’t live with you or without you.
every single day, I sit in my anxiety.
trying to find a way to say anything.
won’t you remember that I’m your baby?
and if you give a ****, won’t you not leave me?
you’re the one I’ll always choose,
please be mine and don’t waste my time.
love me for who I’m meant to be,
so won’t you please give me something?
because sometimes it’s hard for me to talk to you.

Fancy words can't disguise it,
love is *******.

A lie to hide behind
that leaves the world covered in ashes.

I hope one of us chokes,
so you know what pain I'm in,
so I know yours.

Do I know you?
I loved you, held you
but you were a stranger in the end.

The fairytales were wrong,
and I was an idiot,
to believe that you could be mine,
without the rest of the world wanting in.

on the way
to mountain refuge
car-sick