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 Apr 2017 Paige McCulley
A Tango
You will soon realize
that there are more people
willing to use their hands
to undress you
but only a few
would reach out
their hand
to hold yours.

You will see
how many fingers
would want
to touch you
than entwine their fingers
with yours.
Listening to the songs you gave me.
Reading our old conversations we had.
Locked in my room.
Holding on to the memory of what we had.
Wishing you were here holding me.
Why oh why, Do you do this to me?
I miss you,
But you properly never thought of me.
lately i've found myself
contemplating self harm again
i would give anything just to see
the blood rolling down my thigh
the pain is becoming more and
more unbearable for me
it would hurt you more
than it would hurt me if i did it
you would feel more pain than me
knowing you, you'd blame yourself
but you did all you could for me
im losing myself fast
It is so sad to think
That the ones who self harm
who cut;
bruise,
burn,
purge,
starve,
are the most gentle.

Who would rather hurt themselves than anyone else..
When you eat yourself fat it makes you lose your appetite
so you get a job and it makes you think too much
So then you "forget" to eat
My life changed forever the first time I skipped dinner
Now my stomach isn't growling
It's cheering me on
Come on girl this is a sign that you are strong
Do you want hip bones or food?
I want to hear people behind say "look how skinny she is"
Because all I hear is skinny
Forget the skittles and lollipops
We want to feel comfortable enough to go out in a tank top
I wake up and my head is light like a feather
I want to be picked up bride style
And it's embarrassing when you're too heavy
Think light thoughts
Like the wind and sun rays fluttering around the world
Leaves slowly falling from trees
We want Photoshop in real life
People ask "have you been eating?"
That's a sign its working
One day I won't have to **** in
Hollow is good
Less space to take up
 Mar 2017 Paige McCulley
Veronica
For all the girls who are out there
And think they are fat and ugly
Your not
Your beautiful
Your body is ****
Don't let anyone bring you down
We all can't be the same sizes
Imagine might as well make us all look alike
Thats why god made us different
And we all go through different stuff
Please love yourself as who you are
Trust me there is someone out there
Who loves you the way you are
 Mar 2017 Paige McCulley
Kash
Uneasy
 Mar 2017 Paige McCulley
Kash
I drink the coffee every morning
Even though it makes my stomach uneasy
And my hands shake

I skip breakfast in the morning
And set precedent for the day
And the hunger aches

I do it anyway
There is something about rituals
In which I give more than I take
 Mar 2017 Paige McCulley
Bradley
When?

When did you start limiting yourself?
Counting calories like they were a poison,
Eating nothing but crumbs
Until your cheekbones stick out like rocks under your pale skin

When did you start disposing yourself?
Purging your meals as if they were toxic waste,
While you ditch your food like an ugly prom date,
Flushing bits of your soul down with last nights meal

When did you start calculating?
Counting calories like you were taking a math test,
Subtracting and subtracting until there’s nothing left but
Your empty stomach and even emptier soul

So,
tell me when,
when did you start counting your ribs instead of your tears?
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