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290 · Feb 2018
Defecation Dilemma
gluteus maximus left and right half moon cheek

re: byte size buttock attached via usb
  
(uniform firm behind) to this freak

with bowel movement
  
incontinence + gas filled gut evoking contortionist
  
frown stretching to lowest peak

perched upon porcelain goddess

   where elimination did jut held captive hostage
  
atop toilet seat for many a week

exertion to expel rock solid **** required utmost effort

to force jammed bowel movement free

inducing excruciating abdominal cramps really hurt

plus sharp jabbing spasms within high knee

innards rent asunder
  
obstruction as canon gun size ***** did spurt

lodged ***** matter refusing to budge from me

caused by severe constipation

   whereby prayer a waste delivered only increased

   sphincter muscle to scream

for ****** relief this mortal man faced

a worse fate than death, he would deem

since demise would allow alimentary misery to cease

versus remaining in this impasse for what might be years

unless perchance **** lubricant or special grease

would bust loose abominable
  
constriction in arrears finding me unable

   to pay rent or renew lease

best prospect of remaining stationary

   with words to wax

poetic found a glimmer of luck

when a kind wildebeest

   delivered this message via fax

to help this male in dire per situation getting

   pam purred **** unstuck with outsize mug of exlax

to help unclog ****** muck

access to get expunged to the max

but once expulsion occurs

   DO DO PLEASE DUCK!
Handy dandy blues clues plain
all purpose favorite refrain
i.e. "impossible mission"
courtesy complimentary doppelganger
G.I. ("Government Issue", "General Issue",

or "Ground Infantry") Jane
in tandem with Alyson Chain
comes to the rescue attempting
to describe entrenched nonproductive
crippling psychological mindset ascertain

most any reader would consider insane
embedded deep within
genetic code possibly
inherited maternal grandfather,
who emigrated nineteenth century Ukraine,

he (purportedly tailor by trade)
only spoke Yiddish,
language used by Jews
in central and eastern Europe
before the Holocaust.

Originally German dialect with
words from Hebrew, and
several modern languages and
today spoken mainly in US, Israel, and Russia.

Mental illness, (or predisposition thereof)
linkedin courtesy heredity,
supposition nuts so crazy nor insane,
yet nothing further about biology
Iberia lee kant hex Spain

emotional status concomitantly
intertwined with possible causes
such as: Autoimmune, Behavioral,
Cognitive, Neurological,
Environmental - inextricably lodged

within cerebral domain
manifesting as countless
fixations, I disdain
(in retrospect) precious time forsaken,
and absolute zero benefits to gain,

and inflicted severe strain
father and mother felt helpless,
especially when anorexia nervosa
nearly imperiled life source villain
rent asunder body electric drivetrain

brought corporeal standstill
loosed maniac running
rampant within brain
emaciation delivered me
at death's door

prescribed medications Mellaril and Elavil
nsync with psychiatric intervention plus
mother as licensed practical nurse wayne
wright me malnourished body
nutrient fortified drinks,

I passively did abstain
eventually grudgingly gained weight
buffering scrawny skeletal
skein knee membrane
definitely stunted growth plus chain

reaction impacted livingsocial
courtesy thank you me private Charlemagne
promoted cultural revival known
as Matthew Scott Harris'
Carolingian Renaissance.
Relieved of fatherhood Saint
Nick schtick found me
to relinquish ratty outfit, and stow away zee bras
like padding and "FAKE flowing beard,
ah...don't remind me,
those well worn faux paws

of each dear deer (hooping Rudolf would
set precedent as every other reindeer hoof
dost not get cleft out in the cold) withdraws
not to budge like...a Mexican stonewall
contractual obligations grudgingly negotiated,
(especially citing animal abuse as insanity clause),

while angrily clattering rooftop
to rooftop, without pause,
what, and me forcing those strenuous hee haws
(hint to potential dada's, that ledger domain
promising humongous gifts gets old fast,
generating nuttin boot lockjaws

(other Kris Kringles would agree),
where haggard overworked (underpaid)
frequently threatening unionized joining
posse to become outlaws
migrant elves lose stamina to applause,
the jolly ** ** ** role of Santa Claus,

and to a lesser extent return (like new -
with store tag) Easter Bunny suit, defacto
birthday party planner, et cetera,
oh...almost forgot tooth fairy -
ouch! that took a ****** bite out of finances,
hence needed heavy duty gauze,

yet now this papa merely draws
lipservice joy to the world Bobe myseh,
aye yie yie despite punishing, nee
turning into filet mignon, those who poo poo
those culturally grafted pagan grand Poobahs
face lash, and quickly get

smote with invisible taws
particularly any
antiestablishmentarianism
leftist southpaws,
no matter poetically wry ming spewed cents

ability uttered from courtesy
minority reporting maws,
(case in point dexterously yours truly)
laments glaring flaws,
not only of those unaccountable booking costs
driving Earthly unaffordable

materialistic capitalistic jaws,
no matter (albeit
more quiet and somber),
I breathe sigh of
relief to escape naws
zee hating crass mass foofaraws,

and beat hasty retreat from pandemonium
(part and UPS parcel)
fueling manufacturing factories
producing widgets, trinkets, gewgaws,
et cetera subsequently giving employment
(reed nepotism) opportunities

to aunts, uncles in-laws
of management (a perk
found most objectionably
with he who doth trumpet
deed duck shins
to needy) re: yule stated

Taj Mahal family cause,
but to enrich the coffers
of salivating power hungry
(jibber jabber) money grubbers
brandishing chainsaws
to cut down farmed Christmas trees,

where dollar signs
spin each eyeball rubbed raws,
this minor manifesto
concludes as welcome retreat,
where stale Yuletide saws
reverberate warbled carolers
punctuating psalm songs with ews ah ahs!
To aerate, babble and procrastinate
decluttering man cave *******
welcoming this temperate
(Billy me) idle March thirtieth
tooth house sand nineteen

eventually to accomplish
sorting thru lifetime
worth miscellaneous
papered material former
rainforest, I banish

to the shredder repurposing
once upon a time
stately majestic humongous
dignified cub billed bearish,
yet stern silent taskmasters

razed forest mongers left blemish -
fueling the roaring engines
of western civilization
paper products service
material world feeding bookish

appetite, sans (ironic
knotty twist) printed
hot off the press bulletins,
bestsellers inform boyish
wordsmith, how vast

treeless tracts hasten
global abomination, chopping
degradation, lamentation... brownish
blotches encompass inert naked,
torchered, and zapped

originally pristine realms
overrun by sawyers brutish
Paul Bunyanesque (sporting
as good) fellas carved
cleared, and cropped enormous

swaths back when bullish
intruders displaced indigenous
peoples crowing manifest destiny
as mantra to appease expansionist
predilection frenzied cultish

zero sum game to annex
unbroken wilderness promulgating
feverish gold rush to demolish
wantonly scorching Earth,

whereby present day burgeoning
population irrevocably establish
ruination ushering ominous augury
permeating mine mortal mutterings.
utmost nadir of despair found
this atheist craning his neck skyward
hearing resplendent August
choral symphony may sound absurd,
but...mine supreme auditory sense

(compensated with poor vision,
i.e. extreme myopia) genetically injured
acute undoubted gifted courtesy,
viz cochlear ability crystal clear
also heard kindled melodious Lord

and lady joyously plucked harp strings,
which did lyft spirits seared, moored
anchored of me, one who demurred
coyly being graced with
exquisite hypnosis got lured

into cerulean celestial vault,
where I acquiesced and murmured
after a lifetime of hardship inured
every cell in my glob bully
warmed weatherbeaten body

sought salvation, thus poetic urge averred
this skeptic (nee nihilist), no matter
faith no more,...perhaps
soul asylum desperation secured

tenuous linkedin thread of hope
barely connecting yours truly, whose word
not necessarily claiming
to be the gospel truth,

nonetheless sought to nimbly aire
asthma tried and true valued metier,
vis a vis thru write of springiness declare
ring nothing sacrilegious,
nor decried as Harris say (ad) aware
no matter Doubting Thomas's (donned

as trumpeting English muffins)
may suspiciously questioning - dare
faux authenticity atop wobbly
shaky, and noname spear
such antithetical blare
nee as the rhyming ranting

of a harmless maniac
with mediocre ability to scare
heavenly visualization -
secondarily as a zealous
Earthlinked aspiring balladeer,

who immediately chucked
delusive fastasical notions
earning degree as an engineer,
thus setting sights, and
virtually figurative crosshair

to cackle like Chanticlear,
which discordant aural
debacle tortured ear
piercing decibel threshold of unbear
hubble pain for
those unfortunately subjected

and forced to endure such screeching
a result of budget cuts - profoundly severe
that perilous, seditious, and viscous tear
into webbed, whirled, and wide statecraft,
hence melodic reverberation mistaken
as mock apple pie "FAKE" fakir

begging intercession qua spiritual guardian,
wrought mine overactive imagination
conjuring smug cockle doodle fledgling cheer
shoring temple mount reverse fortune,

whereby by fanciful fatefulness, I fell victim,
tomb eye own dim eyes, poppycock did ensnare
riotous, roisterous, and ruinous roostering
essentially roused, grounded,
and distorted nightmare!
Vitriolic scathing psychological malevolent jujitsu
cruelly, fiendishly, incriminating
lambasting opprobrium rue
teenly dished out to yours truly

mechanically engineered hatred to stew
when passive aggression fostered corked,
where self destruction grew
tens of decades ago, when this then
much younger match chew

Scott doubted, hesitated, lollygagged...,
where in solitary confinement he brew
toxic shocking rancor towards father
and mother peaceful conflict resolution
they did eschew

much preferring hurling epithet laced
expletives out their respective mouths flew
acrimonious, furious, noxious...
which poison verbal barbs knew
no letup, nor elicited any reaction their

once upon a time adorable boy,
where they did view
my welworn, passive,
and inert mooching
their unacceptable hashtagged

ill begotten progeny you
know who, if not (spoiler alert) i.e.
this generally conscientious contemplative
enlightened self anointed guru,
albeit modest rarely

doth he (me) ballyhoo
brutally damning, flagrantly hellacious,
judiciously loathsome in *****
tibble malicious venomous tirades shew
wing no merci, when I long

overstayed welcome, yet feared moo
ving way past the age when most
grown children can't wait to pursue
autonomy, emancipation, independence, et cetera.

faith no more actually never prevailed,
only inculcated self hate
buzzfeeding iniquitous, inferiority,
incompetence, et cetera innate

worthlessness, despite positive feedback
when cute boy, but emasculation did penetrate
availing self as token "scapegoat" suffering
suckerpunches mainly name calling to deflate
an already feeble self confidence early

in mein kampf, I experienced
existential nihilism, and negate
purposefulness to live reinforced
as extremely introverted lad,
whose mien did connate

defenselessness subsequently rain
of incriminating abuse within
central processing unit did infiltrate
giving latitude for destruction to resonate
with suicide fueling anorexia

nervosa to exterminate
one germane measly, puny,
quirky... objective to obliterate
self, though parental intervention
did unfortunately vitiate,

whereby fast forward flickr
of pride did generate
altered states of perception
allowing, enabling, and

providing spirit to resuscitate
analogous preceding childhood's end,
when joie de vivre did dominate
and thy singular life innocence

and naivete didst insulate
glorious ebullient boyhood
I try to recaptcha filial love
as papa doth alleviate
crushing oppressive pennilessness.
Ah...herewith ma usual
     dose of pablum from this meal
lee mouthed muttering
     doggerel wordsmith,
     who now writes...
     so here's the deal,
which reiterates a former zeal
namely, the pleasant feel
ling within this humble congenial

chap - thanking quasi fans heel
ling muss card (scarred) psyche
     poetically donning kneel
ling com pose sure (Colin
     Kapernick phonetic style, him
     an implacably steel)
lee strong willed
     up standing heal

dug into grid
     iron, albeit graciously
     poised ex NFL seal
sincere kick starter, -
     who nar squelched Nike ethereal
swooshing sensation (trumping
     formalities - "FAKE" dis claim er:
     "an anti-white rant") unreal

unsolicited accolades,
     he garners plaudits,
     perhaps stern prow esse
     harbored within angular
     chiseled features duet to har
     monic converging multiracial allele
more so than this undeserved
     reasonable rhyming scrivener,

     who expresses gratitude, sans
     mine quirky poetics do appeal
(Ozzy kin see), viz
     crazy train of thoughts
     loudly clattering within
     thine fracked corporeal weal.
Every last drop of fair
blood, sweat, and duct tear

via this hair
brain scheme - exhaust ting air
supply, none the
     less doth cheer
fully, and willingly
     oblige mine moody
     blue (oyster cult)
     route expressway gear

ring cog knish shun en dear
ring non vain err
row'n nee us heart
     felt ego boosting flair
courtesy (additionally
     asper this mare
reed snoop doggy dawg) veer,
really tantamount in

     tandem, sans 'ere
glad a$$ knight,
     and the pups
(chess, non queer,
yule less lee) though rare
lee emerges, while
     holed up in Grendel's lair,
viz bone a fide attempt,

     aye didst aim, square
lee, via ma stiff
     pointer sisters wear
illy to stitch metered
     faux paw prayer
reign hounds sing golden ear
ring three dogged
(arf fathers art in heaven...)

     mutter ring loud and clear
pro noun sub
     bull dog gone
     heart worm ming aire
wharf (fore art thou
     bow wow wing) sere
bus ling three
     dog night, and tare

re: not e'en if yer
adrip as a bit chin heat
let us whip pet smart
     and bark where,
umlaut no longer able
    
     e'en with mad dame butterfly,
     (a poor cage'n
     pooch sheen nee dear)
on par as
     excalibur with difficulty
     loosed fur over, thus conclude
     this tall tail excelsior.
(preface to constipation)

way before aye knew
the name Fletcherism applied
tummy uncommonly (recherché) atypical dyed
in the wool feeding and/or slaking thirst guide

did precepts sans hungry
deaf eating beast impossible to hide
(the ferocious growling harassing imp -
armed to the figurative teeth ready to pounce
viz casus belli sans reeling off

a pseudo say id dish us vicious jeremiad
me, this unrepentant conscientious masticator,
who re: lied
on self control unbeknownst
to this pumpkin eater
unwittingly followed

the basic tenet of Fletcherism - custom made
modus operandi vis a vis exercising okayed
mandibular metered (when famished),
eyes kept closed while tongue gently played

adhered to practice of eating small amounts,
which discipline stayed
engorging self, and as a result
(consuming sustenance

only when hungry avoiding
(wolfing like an instantaneous blitz krieg flash)
found me aware visa vis master car ding
marginal increase in pounds meaning
thy body electric weighed

approximately for long stretches
when a habitue at one or another dining digs
stuffed nibbling on hors d'oeuvre figs
adequately satiating with with oomf

when contra dance caller Scott Higgs
announced "hands four," which signal
helped get my mojo back
and reel lee deuce home jigs,
which kickstarted, syncopated,

oft times espying Bobbie Riggs
who years gone back **** Vic Tory huss
e'en when donning apparel of Whigs
like colluding trump petting molecules
that via tiff ***** doth zags and zigs.
284 · Nov 2018
Atalanta Reincarnate
(presumably still alive
predicated on rumored sightings dive
ving fast as blazing saddles,
     her blitzkrieg,
     nothing but a blurry beehive.)

Swifter than Usain
     (lightening) Bolt
Eden Liat
     (thine eldest daughter,
     a mixed hybrid breed
      greyhound and whippet)
     leaves in the dust
     topnotch any racehorse

     prompting speculation,
     she harkens, and begat
     from a long line,
     sans award
     (at trough feed ding),
     many a cooly
     winning super naturally
     infused awk worded Colt

surpassing (with a flash,
     plus even sub track ting
     considerable handi
     capped add halt
ting delay), thine
     prestigious, princess,
     and prodigious exalt
ting marathon running

     smart lee zipping
     as a whip lash heiress,
     thru no fault
     in the stars
     of her astrological designs
oft times humbly declines
adulation, benediction, dedication
     and deferentially finds

reasons amazingly, gracefully,
     and mannerly deflects
     self imposed grueling practices,
     that she quickly grinds    
    into pulverized powder,
     any high top custom made
     high tech lines
     brand name

     threadbare sneakers saved
     with countless
     trophies that aligns
     storied (and stuffed
     animal bedecked)
     bookshelf, even gag
me with a spoon
     humor tinged competitions,

     faux rotten tum ate oh
     (John Heinz)
seeded "ketchup with me"
     hash-tag game
     opened to all kinds
of village people, including
     some barenaked ladies,
     where flashy Mainliners

     dressed to the nines
     (essentially for sound
     garden variety public,
     who generally favor squash),
     that crop up during
     Indian Summer salad days

     punctuates the warm air,
     where one after
     another lover doth appear
     oak kay embracing ephemeral
     pseudo sappy romance
     spine tingling
     as sharp needling pines.
Alternately titled always look on the bright side of life)

Armageddon would be a morbidly amazing,
   concluding (reign of **** Sapiens)
   fascinating albeit simultaneously catastrophic boon
dog gull to accompany

    (this incognito sans, spacesuit attired as bugs bunny
   foolish faux rabbit, yup you reddit right
   with netzero outlook) amidst others eyed hop along
   (like Cassidy) to find amidst rubble strewn cocoon,

or perchance an arid extra dry
   armed hammer hotmail spelling
   unrelenting radioactive
   blown humungous earthlinked dune
   daffy duck dynasty Don trumpeting a brave (though
   extremely foolish soul) weathering
   fierce-some dust bowl ap
   pear ring like a ghoulish goon
vis a vis via global sand man

   disallowing any inhabitant to be immune
whereat winter days would mimic (nee far exceed)
   those analogous to tropical June
day where nary species of flora nor fauna,
   which latter muffled cry viz Claire De Lune
barely heard above blindingly pitched
   (scoring major lunar home run) when earth's moon
appeared to be batted, snatched, and whacked -

   piñata like casting darkness at high noon
this out of other worldly debacle
   (viz: a scene of apocalyptic,
   cosmic and epic rune
from twilight zone re: outer limits offsetting

   sole millennial Gaia satellite
   believed rigged forever) -
   which end of planetary status quo came soon
er than expected, accompanied

   by Gustav Holst eponymous tune
once Luna rung seismically,
   titanic ally uprooted, violently wrenched
   prior to crash landing at ground zero

   rocked and rolled out of orbitz
   before careering, and screaming
   thru the atmosphere
   analogous a full term baby
   in utero yanked out of womb.

though the above dynamic
   gigantic jack-knifed nihilistic quantum
   spectacular universal wreckage
sans the inner sphere of solar system
   (known to mankind, when said creature, an outlier)
   whence even amidst the early
   bipedal hominids didst throve a sage

no event (whether natural
   or caused by human error),
   would compare neither cap cha,
   when are bit rage

emasculated, and wrought
   onto once verdant terrestrial firmament
   no way to measure nor gauge
the depth, length, scope of total
   absolute value eradicating any trace

   of simian equipage
reducing arrogant, conceited,
   ego-maniacal, dotage
boot far-fetched science fiction phenomena would
   witness civilization captive
   in their own technological cage!
the great bard and Elizabethan play wright
begetting complete dramaturgy
     explaining fate hollowly airtight
succor starved, riddled smitten tattered
     sir real body politik blight
under whelming enthusiasm
     witnessed blank quarto copyright
more tragedy than comedy

     visited mine biography to date
     expressed as dearth decayed delight
devoid absent audience
     hip...hip...hooray three chairs to excite
zero non-exhaustive effort
     summoning stagecraft
     imagining hardened faced spectators
     muted nonexistent ovation,

     sans anticlimactic action
     superfluous stage fright,
thus retrospective stance taken
     billeted envisioned anachronistic gunfight
signifying emotional crisis,
     especially high anxiety pained height
incorporating mine every birthday
     newly aged since

     LIX January thirteenth orbitz insight
oppressive ominous gloomy glum
     obscuring highland dale light
whereby substantial sole action
     asper arrival of midnight
celestial curtain call enclosing
     somber static theatrical night
hoop fully explaining deadening

     copious heavy breathing
     followed by extended lapses
     of utter silence outright
spartan mise en scene absent props
     nsync with holographic thespians
     staid theatrics displaying plight
uneventful sleepy representation quite
leaving entire cast

     (singular char actor his shun
     of myself) remaining
     soporific steadfastly right
lee measure for measure
     much ado about nothing
hermetically sealed, NON GMO

     vacuum packed no sight
worth seeing on the twelfth night
starkly barren aimless
     padlocked mortal soul asylum
     no, not even Romeo and Juliet
     love's labor's lost passion

a comedy of errors, viz unbridled trothplight
mock king lear ring alls well that ends well
     where me crushed psyche doth unite
with death vis a vis
     as demise of Julius Caesar
     et tu Brutus I in vite.
As long term aspiring
     gurgling (stream of consciousness)
     paperback writer, there doth appear
an imponderable quandary

     most likely experienced
     by fellow neophyte authors,
     one pesky bugbear
that just dawned, (within the mind

     of this former tony
     MainLiner) crystal clear,
i would bet mine
     bottom dollar and declare

unequivocally established writers
     mentally tussled (or still do),
     how to accrue “Art of the book writing deal”
     contract subsequently endear

an increasing number of people,
     that definitely feel drawn
     to thy unique flavinoid flair
with words this scrivener displays,

     where oft times decrypting
     (mine block chain) dost jam
     at least one cerebral cog and gear
no matter how far away from me,

     this mind can telepathically hear,
colorful epithets, thus
     seriously considering donning,
     summoning, and trumpeting

     his swiftly tailored,
     harried styled interlinear
difficult to interpret ma Bella cos
     mean mien, thus ready

     (lock, stock and barrel)
     to ship me on a one way junketeer
attired in a combination
     all force he zen,

     (and Caesar) knitwear
and (thrift special red tag sale) leisurewear
oh...preferably gender neutral,

or specifically frilly pink menswear
which could be either
     day or nightwear

yet absolutely non gaudily
     outlandish most unlike
thine convoluted other worldly
     unfairly punishing stentorian

     verb hose noun sense sic cull
     idiomatic ling goo whist tricks
     driven by a harsh grammatical taskmaster,
     (nonetheless one

     gentle non-slavish overseer)
summoning positive
     feedback to reap peer
burgeoning my popularity,

     yet without being queer
yule us, yes...of course retaining rear
penchant inventively steer
ring an unsuspecting reeder

agonizingly testing their
pay shunts, perhaps inducing her/him
to race out the door like a a mad person
     clad with (impeach 45) underwear

calling for men/women in white coats
     to lock up Matthew Scott Harris
     possibly commuting his
     long runonsentence tea
     ching fellow inmates without ten year!
282 · Jun 2018
Tales of a wild goose chase
(huff fin Bach seat driver)...

Aye kin recall when both offspring
     (yay high) as a small child
and now ma deux daughters
     (fledgling young chicks
     though they be),
     flew the coop, sans answering,
     when call of the wild dialed

their biological cell
     phone rang off the hook
as post pubescence metamorphosis
     (into young adulthood),
     they gingerly did brook
arbiters as consensual nymphs
     baited verboten fruit yum zook

thus, freed as private on call designated
     papa chauffeur de jure
yet, a nostalgic feelings
     surface within mine being,

     when many occasions
    witnessed this night owl
     barely awake
     stumbling out the front door

nonetheless diligently
     donning "taxi driver" hat
now, a virtual dust collector
     replaced by near identical head gear

     capped upon me noggin monogramed
     with pet name "hubby" and/or "matt"
thy (well worn) first name,
     despite futile protestation
     simmering into *** for tat

case in point encompasses this poetic blip
     instinctually navigating
     (southeast as the counting crows fly)
     (with ma own embedded

     global positioning satellite micro chip)
from Schwenksville habitue
     to center city Philadelphia, Pennsylvania where,
     nary agitation viz calm, cool,

     and collected demeanor did e-clip,
nor (as prevailed during anxiety fraught youth),
     emotional state would hove done a flip
with clenched steering wheel,

     whar white bar knuckles would grip
but nowadays (courtesy
     of targeted prescription medications)
mien psychological state quite mellow,

     and approaches ferrying human cargo
     via 2009 Hyundai Sonata
     as one shaded eyes, cool cat,
     and (so like...mon) really hip

telling spouse to pipe down and zip her lip
lest she wants the aggravating maneuver
     thru plethora of pedestrians
     (nope, yours truly
     DID NOT run anybody over)!

This mister plied his way
     to 1601 Market Street with nary a hitch
though returning back northwest to our abode
     entailed a bit hove va glitch

when orientation
     found me way off beaten bath,
     (a quarter tank of gas) circling
     the Philadelphia Airport with

     "Welcome to Tinicum Township),"
     some natural wildlife niche,
and of course did NO confession getting lost,
then breathing sigh of relief

     espying urban skyline,
     where Ben Franklin statue
     forever frieze a stitch
in time, and even rumbling
     deafening noise elicits nada flinch!
281 · Jun 2018
I Wanna Head Transplant
Yup, you red correctly,
     this noggin must go
     perhaps donated
     to the Salvation Army, or Good Will
cuz, said atrophied cranial
     horridly styled comfortably numb skull,
     the source of immeasurable

     beg hot ten woe, from dawn to dusk
     nothing boot eve ville
hollow cavity mainly comprised
     of wooly webbed weaving waste,
     uber sawdust, sans Schuylkill
     River effluvium and runoff rotten rill
hence, e'en a think tank

     designated as Abby Normal
     formerly atop a body named Phil
lip, or Wright winged Orville
one half brotherly duo,

     the other sibling Wilbur,
     whom both made a mill
yen legends getting airborne their lil
mechanical contraption

     atop Kitty Hawk,
     North Carolina with bi sic ****
mechanical aptitude,
     when born aloft **** Devil Hill

synonymous making fin hushed
     blue prints emulating
     flying fish, whose grill
like cartilage backbone

     precursor to Evil
Knievel, who soared
     on his motorcycle a devil
lush daring stuntman,

     whose helmeted crown
     full pursestrings muted cavil
ling critics with legitimate enterprise
     earning gobs of legal tender,

     whence aye aver
     his mugshot ought to appear
     on common denomination bill
and/or honoring throughout
     the entire month of April.
When alive and livingsocial
within webbed wide world
analogous to an emotional hell
I never experienced pomp and circumstances,
and quavers with inconsolable tears
graduation theme song
popularized courtesy Sir Edward Elgar,
thus suicidal ideations no longer relevant
yours truly need not quell
he rages against series of unfortunate events
comprising his life and hard time
(one protracted existential crisis) and yell
like a rebel into the infinite abyss of darkness.

Every subsequent high school graduation year
antedated since June
ninety seventy seven where
yours truly stepped to the podium
to secure his diploma
(I barely squeaked by
from one grade to the next)
stricken with anxiety and experienced urge
to sprint mile a minute evoking manic tear
zipping by at light speed
creating spindleshanks to blur as pair
sorry excuse for legs burning ghee
until reaching destination re:
a specific rocking in casbah Kashmir
actually a sought after interview
with popular Emir.

Personal mailer daemons aside
Azrael readily befriended me before I died
and ably, eagerly and willing obliged to guide
these lovely bones of mine
went for out of world joyride
away to subterranean habitat
where heavenly delight magnified
sense and sensibility overarching credo
unconditional kindred acceptance
downplayed prejudice and pride
communion among apostolic auras
and personas spied
greeting halo trusting word of mouth
as adequate signal to be verified
nullifying former dependence
on prescription medication
to thwart becoming zombified.

The following pharmacological medications
taken courtesy to cope with anxiety,
obsessive compulsive disorder, panic attacks
and generally curbing tendencies to avoid
physiological symptoms such as:
nausea, palmar hyperhidrosis
(unrelenting sweaty palms), and vertigo.

GLYCOPYRROLATE, TAB 2 MG (thrice daily)
CLOMIPRAMINE CAP 50 MG (once nightly)
RISPERIDONE TAB 1MG (once nightly)
FLUOXETINE CAP 20MG (once daily)
PRAZOSIN HCL CAP 1 MG (three pills nightly)
BUSPIRONE TAB 15MG (twice daily)
PRAMIPEXOLE TAB 1MG (once nightly)
CLONAZEPAM TAB 0.5MG (once nightly
AMITIZA 24 MCG
(prescription laxative - as necessary)
280 · Apr 2018
natural soporific narcotic
recurrent suicidal thoughts vain
     gloriously wend
     (o'er a death cab for cutie weeknd)
     yanking zeal

becalming this crash test dummy rolling
     stone temple pilot inxs
     of maroon 5 plus decades long
perdition hellaciously slogging

     slow as adam and the ants,
     thru fifty shades of gray's
     anatomy common weal
masterly baiting this motley crue (cutting),

     beatle browed, beastie boy,
     outre gee (bee) us, grateful dead,
     mailer daemons inhabit
     cavernous fist size vastness steel

via Herbie Hancock (Hermans Hermits)  
     cheesy Munster trap doors that steal,
deep purple swiftly tailored
     culture club members squeal

hosted by mega death pack rat boston for real
venue at Tokyo hotel, via en grave invitation
     signed by Alice in Chains poison huss kiss
     sing, which will spellbind

     once contents unveiled, an instant app peal
immediately choking off air supply
     then Alice Cooper egging bad company
     to hypnotize the guess who sacrificial meal

supplanting raw primal scream from spinal tap
     acquiescing self to abandon all hope,
especially if black sabbath joins
     creed dance clearwater revival

     dark shadows would demand one
     (to take a knee) and kneel
before sacrificing oneself at the beck and call
     of evanescent nirvana

     experiencing permanent relief,
sans soul (twisted) sister riding a hansom
     off phish hull heart shaped coffin
     ample room enough for blind

     melon collie 10,000 maniacs, their heal
ling powers profusely emanating
     via m&m shaped talking heads
methinks averring obeisance

     to judas priest and ******* with coldplay feel
ling of eternal sleep, where quiet ***** riot
     joins carpenters, whose underground
     sepulchral crowded house indicative

  cynthesis iz a done dizzy Gillespie afterlife deal
and you bet your sweet bippy meme
an extra bonus for orthodox believers
     (absent myself - a skeptic),
     whose karma with long deceased will anele!
280 · Jan 2019
An Average Schlepper
This fool doth not consider himself wise,
writing paltry poetry difficult
to read and/or actualize
methinks perusers of great literature
snub nose how I miserably advertise,

laughable attempt to aerobicise
fifty plus shades of gray matter
lobbying showy words agonize
zing effort perhaps best to cauterize
near petrified glob - boon

for scientists to analyze
baffling laboratory technicians
unusual crenulations
a profound surprise
pitiful peremptorily doth apologize

unlike verbalization feasible
after webbed whirled fist size
terra incognita reveals numbskull years
wrought yours truly to anesthetize
smelting, squelching,

and suppressing emotions
scored how tree rings annualize
environmental conditions definite
premature imp of the pervert
poe fella lifetime channels,

where bullies did antagonize
upon death requested autopsy authorize
zing eager scalpels to apprize
miniature dried river bed
formerly streams of consciousness

lake never seen before engendering
crowdsource to hypothesize
baffling every expert,
how terrible fate did baptize
ala lemony snicket series

of unfortunate events
multiplied power bajillion times
number only Google could surmise
obvious tell tale signs did brutalize
as if smacked upside the head

one unfortunate gladly apparently
suffered maelstroms of armageddon size
poet chars evidently
succeeded to burglarize
more successful than Watergate

psychological ploys hackers
noninvasively did cannibalize
(perhaps bored furloughed
government employees)
albeit noninvasively deeming

imposible to canonize
resultant cerebral corpus
understandably did capsize
entire body politik (Democrat)
faced, booked on hatred did demonize

verbal assaults indicate
suffering did caramelize
cerebrum, cerebellum and brainstem
resembling burnt offering 
impossible to categorize

glommed hardened integument colleagues
hard pressed to characterize
highly rendered anomaly,
hence unfair to criticize
erratic schizoid personality disorder

quite evident amyloid plaques 
did significantly crystalize
definitely explain aberrant quirks
resultant incessant emasculation 
unquestionably led him to demoralize.
As a lactose intolerant
     cow whirring lion eye zing
dual (Banjo playing) Manichean
     ("FAKE") keen man womanizing,
faux nymphomaniac wannabe,
     I cone only scream about visualizing
nip pulling and getting a breast
     of Hani La (vanilla),

     this sweltering unfreezing
Wednesday while mouth
     watering chiefly hanker
     for milch of
     human kindness, which titillating
fanciful fandom fantasies
     skinny dipping into soliloquizing
whet dreams har made

     sadly, simply, and sorely realizing
test tickles quizzing
noggin merely figment
     of fertile imagination pricking
prurient potent plentifully oozing
naughty salacious, licentious,
     and felicitous evocations pulsating
hypnotically invoking

     trance send dint overriding
gloriously flirtatious escapade needling
my over active
     thought processes monopolizing
ability to focus attention trying
     to compose joyous leavening,
sans jump starting
     massaging, and kneading

     dormant limp libido liberating
panting allied force,
     which seems tubby
     in axis Sybil for Nick -
     A.Ting, thus Celeb Basie,
     frantically, gingerly, and
     haphazardly kickstarting
***** riot with this feeble attempt

     for a firm hut heave action,
     one docile male member
     devoid of livingsocial,
     hence aye ****
     sitter ring joining

a nunnery, which
     would be habit chilly unfitting,
     and very un convent
     shin null for a poetic ending!
277 · May 2018
The Buzzard
Within the common (all purpose room)
     at highland manor apartments aye
daily encounter, one bewitchingly dreaded
     fiendishly horrible, jeeringly loopy,

     nap noopy, pugnaciously ravenous, talon
     viciously wizened, xenophobic yeti, zapping
     zeroing zillion zippers,
     zoned Zuckerman alley bye

barred doors fate helplessly jury-rigged
     sealed with with plaintive cry
no escape known to this man caught
     in a deadly voodoo clutch,

     thus doomed to die
ugly cannibalistic, frightful,
     heathen rumors myopic eyes espy
alarmed at feeling trapped

     akin to a wingless fly
tapping reserves of scape goat
     coping techniques ingenuity,
     which earned me moniker "fall guy"

where accursed cruel destined exit
     from getting husked, issued
     jagged lance like mandibles "hi
there unknown weekly reader", I

pray for super leftist
     write hand man/woman to extricate
     (via whipping up literary poetic fabrication),
     then joining me to sing jai

(let victory prevail against killer odds)
     perhaps summoning division
     of British shiver rights phalanx,
     hood reply with Hackneyed "oh kai"

springing surprise rescue,
     sans swooping inside
     this hermetically faux prison,
     where Matthew Scott Harris doth lie,

yet realistic to accept my
demise without putting up
     a good fight well nigh
but... if luck finds

     thee plucking this bard
     (out maws of death) be treated to custom
     ye will be rewarded with pie
ala mode enjoying a Quai
yet moment...yeah...fading hope...sigh!
solely reduced to communicate
via my choice online mode
     (ease of use preference
     via Facebook Messenger), candidate

said Modus Operandi aye find tubby great
even though this papa doth hate
to say "good bye..."
     after lingering delay followed

     by "I love you"
     swallowing tears irate
as bittersweet poignant end
     ding our irregular chat as if
     (analogously)...aye ab duck kate
(albeit temporarily),
     the joyous role of fatherhood

especially denoting young womanhood of late
said offspring, I helped beget (with ma mate)
i.e. wife (which marriage
     experienced rough patches)

     nine or so months ceased to ovulate
just a tad more'n nineteen Earth Orbitz ago
     as reckoned via dull lix gray matter
     encapsulated within

     thine barnacle encrusted pate
her virtual presence encountered
     earlier today - March 24th, 2018
     doth highly rate

as supremely blessed,
     through swallowed sadness sans tete a tete
only after clicking end conversation
     does this dada

     (with genuine muffled sobs) ululate
agonizing with reality empty nest syndrome
     asper averred second daughter
     aye helped yes sire re:) to beget
whose tender loving care)
     under voluntary auspices

     sans strong willed kid sister (Shari)
     decision immediate decision needed tubby made
     (concurrence with birth mother - Abby)
     already couple years zipped,

     her homecoming (who knows when),
     dud dada Matthew Scott Harris
     must keep away fixating on requisite adulthood),
     argh...now...must needs wait!
276 · Dec 2017
Untitled
Aye Go Gaga

Hey Play boy bunny,

(▒)(♥)(▒)

Are you tired looking for real dating partner like me
whelp...probably nada worth yar while spending precious
   time frittering away re:
ding tha following mish mash literary mush - we
ving, and bobbing, which iz meaningless mum bo pap agree?

(▒)(♥)(▒)


This poker face mwm 4 bad romance gamboling hall
ideal to suit up for a fun virtual cat and mouse chase
myopic eyes stare intently into cyberspace
folk kiss sing song snap chat ting
mine eyes fixated b4 ur image seconds erase
with an exclamation of eureka a ha -
u look familiar at least yar face
mebbe we both lived during same time centuries ago, eh
perhaps in adjoining caves some place
and/or dashed off the starting line of tha human race.
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -
this yo dull ling josh hing glute max a mess aye n us
tooting ring ding oof a max i mus drake
haint named Bruce
boot ah do like the taste of cous cous
what the deuce
as i goose
whereby bull winkle the moose
n Natasha the squirrel plus otter creatures tink i lack mental juice
er purr haps goot a ***** loose
right duh gray matter of dis knit wit, the "infamous" they noose
sum hmm iz amiss from indigent guy lugged in papoose
cob bulled with whirled wide web
peppered with rotten green tomatoes -
prompting n immediate VAMOOSE
& find my rye ming ting ab
solute zero in chime with zee cuckoo
ready to call doktor demento ore Zeus.
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -
thus, this friendship introduction
will mutual ideally nada blow
based on ma unseen essence of body, mind
& soul more so than dough
i.e. money, which tends tubby superficial criteria
viz assess worthiness to flow
toward greater comprehension akin to garden
requires one 2 **** din ***
thus, this common non sloppy joe
maw owl ease keeps tim self i.e. ya know
a contemplative sort & writes ha low
crossing fingers immediate aversion arises,
yet an emphatic "no"
toward me would be taken in stride per this poe
it, whose ability finds comfort within simple pleasures
of life while invisible one that doth row
this creaky human vessel occasionally
calls out for big tow.
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -
mebbe as a d liver e purse son
2 supplement social security income
(this disability 4 generalized anxiety)
within me gray matter doth lay.
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -
although (mentioned for noah particular rhyme nor reason)

of heterosexual tendencies, my inner sanctum affected

by unkind actions towards those,

who (by choice, genetics, fondness,

or environment) steer clear of the madding crowdsource

who (as a rather skinny diminutive boy - and average emasculating

asia meister wordsmith) experienced constant taunts.

no matter that  me very late mother (who passed away from

ovarian cancer some decade plus two years ago) encouraged me to

give the bullies a WHAT FOR (in that era kids could pummel

without reprisal),  but fear kept me back,

viz the brutish nasty monsters zeroed

on countless vulnerabilities such as being affected with blatant

nasal tone when talking,  extremely shy,

and undersized physique honed - fallacy

sensitivity to others differently abe bulled

or others, who hapt to be fair

game sans being gay or lesbian for instance.
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -
can be accurately ascertained, this archetypal nonestablishmentarian
introspective individual attempts to affect exultant image
with words my (ahem) pen ultimate aim.
yet all the while trying
to steer clear enduring wagging virtual finger in blame
neither at this fellow via x 'cept able dame
chance circumstances of existence akin to being frozen
in some space/time paradigms frame
attempting extricating ourselves a lifelong game
which message offered in poem rather lame.
-    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -    -
email moi, which means
applying cerebral muscles 2 flex
fire off a brief bull a tin

or mebbe u wanna drop me a lion by zoo
per doo purr postal service, si from you.

Okay.

(▒)(♥)(▒) - pose crypt:

death tomb he iz a permanent good bye

though, when me mum passed i only did cry

for about one week - cuz resentment did not die

within me, yet toward me octogenarian widower dad

who during tumultuous prepubescence a fie

re: cold war raged,

which deprived "dad" tune oh his guy

now grown (with two adult daughters) says "hi"

allows emotional connection, cuz - lesson learned late -

need to communicate sentiments today, lest they lie

dormant, and return with a vengeance after grim reaper

doth exuberantly and well nigh

whisk a family member, friend, neighbor...away on the sly

thus - even if the wording nada so perfect, the effort to express

heartfelt feelings well worth a try

thus, every mortal shares this bitter irony of life

forever asking being born only to pass away

(vis a vis via whatever faith) why...?
Accessible twenty four hours a day
seven days a week,
fifty two weeks a year.

Spring 2022 Curtain call at
Highland Manor Apartments unit b44
framing Mother Nature nook
ever changing scene unfolds
analogous to storybook.

I espy (hear and see)
while sitting at table
housing Macbook Pro
plethora of wildlife
on a band dinned patch of woodland,
yet slated to resemble cookie cutter vinyl city
that sprout like mushrooms and/or toadstools.

Yours truly bares witness to fauna
(most likely oblivious
to encroaching urbanization
most often becoming endangered
and/or extinct creature if lucky
enough becoming cherished, loved, valued
property of zoo keeper),

who rarely encounter **** sapiens
while innocuously and innocently
buzzfeeding, kickstarting pinteresting
linkedin with rites of Spring
fawning, matchmaking, twittering
regarding instinctual self survival tactics.

At a safe distance removed
our perch (chance) analogous
to one way mirror,
whereby yours truly and the missus
watch the nature channel live
never tiring at random antics
exhibited by aural and visual
courtesy spontaneous unrehearsed
Animal planet productions.

While astutely, fascinatingly, keenly, quietly
observing semi, quasi, pseudo... wild kingdom
flashback in space/time continuum occurred.

I observed banned band
of untamed ruffians and outlaws
use wildland as hideout from y'all
sip pose zid smart alecks
who would be surprised country bumpkin
like me can rattle off...
courtesy nasal twang

(or because of) Schwenksville drawl
which can pose difficulty understanding
attributed nysc with submucous cleft palate,
hence droning voice of mine
in tandem with puny size
found yours truly scapegoat
bullies taunted and teased

I felt analogous being
just another brick in the wall
until sharecropper mama and papa Joad
headed west Okie dokie
with truant steering da wheel
driving off into sunset via UHaul
passing zee monotony

doodling Yankee went hoo(t)'n and hollerin
across this country tis of thee
imitating moost every doggone animal
earn'n chump change telling tales tall
like dis here mumbo jumbo
his birthplace home to countless
life forms large and small
some skitter, slither, scamper,

jump, hustle, hop, fly, crawl
and we even encountered
mighty big beef eating fellas
who beat up punks
getting in barroom brawl
adieu fromm simple folks,
cuz nuttin else to write dat's awl!
Two hundred forty two
(12.1 score) years ago
countless stripling soldiers
strapping farming homeboys
healthy agrarian lads
raised among generations

in summer re:
offspring original settlers heirs
family acreage encompassed
wide uninterrupted forested swaths
across sprawling vistas
sparsely populated enclaves,

now heavily industrialized
lovely bones occupying
unmarked never known graves
buried amidst avast
cleft rapacious urbanization
long forgotten innocent youths

hailing within then bucolic
Montgomery, Delaware and Chester county
forsook their young precious lives
voluntarily promising sons
risking life and limb
more often former versus latter

sacrificing stripling flesh
encompassing urbanized tracts
quite familiar to yours truly
suddenly made aware
unbeknownst till yesterday
informative literary handiwork

titled "A Glimpse of Freedom"
engagingly written by Douglas Shupinski
details innocently naive country bumpkins
sacrificing potential sweat of brow,
albeit grueling labor
fostering holistic existence

transforming boyz to men
hardened green soldiers
into battle weary fighters
regarding, kickstarting, envisioning
inchoate cause named freedom
emancipating fledgling America

against British throne
awareness percolates,
perturbs, permeates psyche
synchronizing, manifesting, galvanizing
how past historical events
within close proximity,

where I mostly resided
since birth, now experience
absorption, communion, edification...
with dead souls
nearly deathly quiet
only most perceptive can detect!
276 · Jun 2017
Aegis Beckons
clangorously declaring emergency, fate grimly heckles,
implies jackknifed life, killing my natural optimism,
positivism quashed, re: sort to undertake vitality,
wreckage xing yawping, zigzagging, alms breeching
charily. death embraced for grave happenstance,
indigent jarring kingdom, losing my native ordinary pleasure,
quivering ringing, singularly tripping uppermost volume
while Xeroxing yellowing zone, albatross blithely crushing desire
effecting fun, grippe holding impossible, Jackhammer
keeps lamentably mashing nasty oppressive pierced quaking,
reducing sensibility to utterly voiced worthlessness,
x-rays yield zero ambition boosting capacity driving
existence, future gloomy heralds iffy joie de vivre, killing
lousy male negative outlook presages quintessential
rage spilling thru useless voiceless wretched xiphoid zeal.
Non random, but (based on my very
     far out, flimsy laughably
     amateurish thinking)
     faux feigned aye
firmly believe, that
     what appears bye and by
as erratic, kinetic,

     pathetic housefly...doth not defy
explanation, when theory linkedin
     with sophisticated espy
craft, and anonymously fyi
confirmed, grounded, touted...
     across world wide web
    of secret agents akin
     to James Bond 007 guy

remotely controlled, via
     artificial intelligence high
lee believable telltale
     (invisible) fingerprints my
counter espionage foot
     soldiers well nigh
came to this
     sticky hunch expertly ply

ying spellbinding twisted
     sinister and sly
and family tombstone,
    where anti-American saboteurs,
     perhaps planned purposely
     left loose ends
     only one practiced
     in surveillance would tie

dangling minuscule threads
     pulled together, how
     indiscriminate fiends
     of American government
     blatantly intrude zooming
     carefree necessitating vie
hubble counter measures
     Accorded unsuspecting

     and surreptitious ploys
CIA and/or FBI Intel recourse
     never need to explain why.
Anyway scrutinizing distraction
     from Insecta nuisance
     found yours truly
     pondering impossible odds
     stacked against this elusive drone

(YES), this supposition
     finds a "NON FAKE" assertion
     Musca domestica
     gets used to hone
in on random (a for instance)
     chosen guys, who share
     the christened name
     this Matthew Scott Harris,

interestingly enough
     tend tubby a lone
ranger clear ring stream
     of consciousness muck
cob bray undertaken
     (with grave solemnity)
     while awaiting for
     divine intervention

     with any luck
     after reciting pater noster,
     while this drake
     didst quack like a duck,
     hoop fully heard
     by cosmic consciousness
     differentiating my unique cluck
among the bajillion

     of other angry bird,
     calls and even accompanied
     by snorting from one buck
     king bronco minister,
     whose birth debut
     occurred, viz astrologic
     Capricorn sign butta no fault
     could hash tag, nor pin

     blame circumstance attributed to
     nobody in particular recognizing
     accounting held for no logical rhyme
     or courtesy of
     posthumously feted author
     Ayn Rand who, birthed
     Genre Objectivism creates novel
     page turner starring John Galt

     (yeah...yeah..yeah...
     him of Atlas Shrugged)
     waiting by Howard Roark
     named Fountain Head
     (with mine pent up insult
ting barrage of
     regular play station
     expletives, and time

     soon to call quits),
     where protracted radar
     enforced grunts to halt
**** sitter hub lee delayed by...
     an unexpected Alien abduction
     (fortunately nsync
     with my gestalt)
this male (terrific, sarcastic fault

less rhapsodic, quixotic,
     poetic, magnetic, exalt
ting kinetic, Italic,
     generic, energetic, dolt
copacetic, atheistic adult

prayed for nothing
     short of being struck
     by a (NON binding mortally
     Wounding) strunken white
     hot lightening bolt.
274 · Dec 2020
The Ujjayi breaths
(pronounced – u jai yah)

The following haphazardly cobbled together some few years past (initially as a reasonable rhyme), nevertheless sustained discipline yours truly mather of fact doth cotton metaphorical gin still spins (yarn not gonna believe poppycock) within livingsocial as outcast of poker flats pun gent, whereby I strive to meditate successfully daily upwelling groovy sensation some hours doth last balloons within me buoying airborne courtesy spiritual blast.

Approximately three plus decades ago, I became ambitious to learn Yoga Asanas blow pesky mind chatter away (postures) despite inflexible body non coe whopper rating adamantly refusing to bend doe like (no just at the knee), but essentially flow wing stretches, while uncomfortably seated go wing to floor.

Mine physique experiences non Joe veal extreme difficulty involved simply seating stiff - NO can do sitting, whence, bony **** versus slightly more addy Poe posterior padding (viz junk in trunk) at present. The status quo mutter hoof act honest to dog cross my heart ambition roe bust lee expended to do more than sit on floor. Even slow lee sliding downward muscular flexion quite, a temporary restraining order i.e. TRO figurative and literal stretch.

Nonetheless, this persevering Lake wobegon soul lowered slender body, (when eye attended class) at Yo Yo ma intentional community within Sumneytown, Pennsylvania named Kripalu Yoga Community, where residents adapt macrobiotic diet under too till edge via auspices of cherished founder (Amrit Desai, i.e. Guru Dev).

Before entering sanctified space everybody removed their shoes often (now and again) guests welcome to partake regimen at said rue **** men tree idyllic retreat offering general public an opportunity true lee worth effort to experience this alternative lifestyle.

Though “U” might already be a pro unlike me, who didst barely progress as aye re: view memories toward greater flexibility minimally made one lasting whew benefit constituted of deep breathing asper you dull lies segue-way into light trance intended meditative zooming into mindfulness away from rat race. Even to this day, an effort gets made to set space aside time to transcend cares and concerns trace sing worry lines from uncertain future, and vase a versa if conditions favorable induce lightness – erase sing major concerns of being if perchance, face shill contortion asper body doth trite hoo easy and grace full flowingly, gently, harmoniously, indubitably lace limbs one into another - joyfully, kinesthetically, at comfortable pace.

Ewe experience lambent maneuvering naturally, optimally, peacefully, quietly, surreptitiously, et cetera into deep sleep of a hilly Edenic mirage tenderly controlling inhalation, and exhalation might seem silly, sans breathing hopefully remains sustained.

As a novitiate practitioner with ***** Wonka, this magical, modality (qua zee moat *** modus operandi) regarding, striving toward ultimately vast wrestled xfinity, yielding zestful fling away global concerns all the while grappling dutifully attaining jingling mystical state of consciousness, (perhaps mental experience a king dome all to itself, similarly venerated, vis a vis basically comprehend ping pong per positive phrases analogy, asper anyone who reads and understands this ring gull ling communique) as I attempt to describe mesmerize zing, mindset mosaic explicit words seem da fish hint.

Thus analogous self induce hypnotic cerebral deep minted experience possibly more clear to envision without stinting the reeder. Nonetheless, the conscious, deliberate guided “high” kickstarted courtesy Ujjayi breathing, which tint head breath comprises breathing technique employed in different
variety of Taoist and Yoga practices.

In relational mash mich hug gun flint sparking neurons to ascend Yogic exaltation, where mindset doth glint within casting glowing countenance whispering the ocean breath.

The length and speed of breathing aid did, controlled by diaphragm, strengthening braid did mental fiber which purposefulness of ujjayi without being fanatical, an effort gets made daily meditation teasing envisioned in laid within wafting warm waves (comprising grade “A” leased half hour, but no more than twenty four). If time constraints un war rented ala limited restraints disallow currying pour forth, the course fostering, inducing limned score arching relaxation merely practicing to open a door slow prolonged breathing bonjour can deliver (pizza pie) energizing feel akin to flying like Icarus above urban jungle roar.
274 · Jul 2018
So Dog Gone Tired Today...
Like a fly without his/her buzz
even popping a guarana (caffeine) does
not shake the feeling
     like brain covered with fuzz

no matter how hard I try eyelids claps
shut nor how many hours of sleep elapse
offers nary reprieve folds
     welded tightly shut

     feel like they weigh
     much as a ton mud covered *****,
thus thought to summon
     meager energy reserves perhaps

generating poetic lines
     interrupted by taking constant naps
but no matter eyelids
     weigh heavy as a ton steel traps

narcolepsy not ruled out since
     tired body struggles as if grasping for air,
yet such fatigued state uncommon for me,
     though bothersome to grin and bear

this bout of sleepiness, where this
     white knight chess sleeps
     trouble free aye declare
quality deep rapid eye

     movement marked noticed
     since medication taken
     to treat debilitating anxiety e'er
concomitant panic attacks, where psyche

     got rent asunder send
     ding this atheist to hell
     episodes pained me
     forked flaming tongues flare

ling, immobilizing, paralyzing
     and stinging entire body,
     hence methinks primary cerebral gear
and cog glommed
     like a drain clogged with hair

nonetheless, no alarmist worry,
     nor "worst case scenarios" betray
my ordinarily mellow emotional state,
     thus any task I must delay

thoughts unstoppably captivated
     by snoozing upon
     a bed of freshly mown hay,
and then hours later

     diminishing fatigue in catchy rye
ming verse aye re: lay
relishing being awake,
     the mine true valued self I kin portray.
Altruistic August aery angelic alms
applied astounding
     abracadabra affect as Brahms
I liken to a lite lullaby,
     and aye acknowledge calms
financial short comings

     ace action activated across avast
time/space continuum concerning
rental assistance applied
     (for Abby and Matthew)

     my Geiger Counter recorded
     as significant beneficent blast
and such lucky largesse compels me
     (the mister) en compassed

with a sudden lightness of being
and completely, pleasantly, shell shocked
     (figuratively), thence imagining "ding"
****, asper the reality analogous

     to me noggin temporarily transformed,
     transfixed, transferred,
     soundless pinball sized clouds
     delivered sensational fling

when informed by Jacklyn Geiger
     (perhaps related to Johannes
     Wilhelm Geiger (1882-1945)
     invented -in part or wholly - the Geiger counter),

but no matter this irrelevant tidbit
     of inquisitive genealogy
the main purport per this poem
     predicated on pronounced provisions

providing us (the occupants
     of B44 at Highland Manor Apartments,
     Schwenksville, Pennsylvania 19473)
with a whopping reduction
     to the very pleasant tune:

one hundred and seventy dollars a month
     effective circa April first
     two thousand and eighteen,
     and if alive during World War II,

     would (since lineage
     significantly weighted with Semitism)
     envisions his life cut short,
     via burnt offerings re: crematorium,
     or vaporized victims upon a funeral pyre

     and most likely Holocaust genocide  
can Noah way be rectified,
     such a grievous tragedy
to express gratitude

     via literary modus operandi
     rather than see king
     a ghost writer to hire
and hoop fully DO NOT

     cause synapses to snap
(crackle or pop induce explosion
     within gray matter) or thinking cap
     (albeit best to Don a nonflammable brand)
     so as not to cause accidental conflagration

and hmm...and maybe...
     this skeptic can commune
      with long fostered nada greatful dead
     spirits hood suffered at least

     one very restless night,
a Jew (in name only)
     experienced a lucky strike,
which subsequently
     roused this contemplative chap -
- and pap

per Razz Zee to broadcast and commercialize  
     (albeit electronically) utmost appreciation
and additionally to pay forward
     by pursuing as compensation my platelets on tap
for handsome allotment intent to donate blood,
     a much needed needling conscience life restoring agent.
After about fifty years as married wife
the last three fraught with strife
obvious telltale signs of terminal illness rife
hysterectomy irrevocably didst jackknife
at the least severely incapacitated
think pitted, riddled,
and rounced her tortured life.

Ovarian cancer affliction
on par with megadeath
bald pate (color of bleached skull),
and crossbones characterized mortal death
oxygen tank to sustain each measured breath.

Nonetheless her angry spirited accursed
ferocity, ejaculatory, denunciatory burst
expletive and epithet
peppered preponderant rant,
(no kidney you) laced
and dull livered worst
fulmination, exasperation,

(albeit feebly faint)
damnation well versed
lips mouthing implacable thirst
to defy grim reaper uber
lyft driver analogous hearst
jubilation immune to
interrogation and/or humiliation
diatribes interpreted glorification,

remained scythe lent bore
scathing rebukes hurled regarding
her sole son (courtesy
miraculous biological reproduction)
dogged with financial perdition
eased series of unfortunate events narration
blessed nonagenarian widower husband

generous father gave male progeny
eased (his/mine) absolution
availed immense monetary boost,
she (envision banshee)
voiced abhorrent objection
regarding liberal outpouring
triggered her vitriolic remenstration.

Similar with pointed gesticulation,
excoriation, cannibalization, abomination...
against reducing his albatross
yoking penurious defeat
her livid hostility displayed, decried,
****** how Matthew Scott,
(I shoal mussel metaphor

without clamming up, how
said offspring coasts) along easy street,
while she sorely protested (thankfully in vain)
even after succumbing to painful demise,
she vehemently, obstreperously and helplessly
loathes handsome handout
to yours truly forsakes Pete.
Yours truly just a fluke of the universe
worming his way hook, line and sinker
thru the meandering time stream,
which current speeds up the older I get.

A garden variety (generic) agrarian wannabe
antiauthoritarian, bookish antiquarian bloke,
antitotalitarian, well mannered barbarian
disestablishmentarian, egalitarian, futilitarian,
grammarian, quasi hereditarian, latitudinarian,
libertarian, majoritarian, nonsectarian,
nonvegetarian, proletarian, sexagenarian,
Unitarian.

Yours truly amazingly
chronologically, enigmatically,
gracefully, interminably weathered
despite malevolent mental maelstrom,
linkedin with extinction of **** sapiens
in tandem with many flora and fauna
populating planet Earth
courtesy Manhattan Project
when Ernest Rutherford split the atom.

Fiendish and gruesome
phantasmagoric denizens
dwell deep inside subterranean vault
perform an evil dance
haunt psychic landscape
with imaginary (yet realistic)
gargoyle visitations cast macabre trance
nocturnal unconscious invaders
cavort and gallivant
disturb quiescent sleep with
devilish and sinister prance.

Apparitions crept stealthily
into peaceful slumber receptacle
repository whence illusory
landscape of dreams
take place to rejuvenate exhausted
body, mind and spirit triage
rent asunder blissful sleep
with a startled fright
cold sweat drenched
nighttime garments and bedding
teeth chattered uncontrollably
heart pounded loudly inside chest
nightmarish phantoms wrought
an awful ghoulish sight.

Mushroom cloud anniversary
triggered frenzied gargantuan hallucination
since 6 August 1945, at 08:15
inauguration into atomic age took place
one country after another sought
to acquire demonic and destruction devices
maintain self-preservation in
surreal atomic weapons race
impossible to escape the dark threat
that looms and threatens life on Earth
one launched missile spells extermination
across entire global space.

No escape from humankind military machines
munitions march mean madness
and guaranteed demise to all life
**** Sapiens violent history of
bias, intolerance and/or prejudice
characterizes vicious warfare
and chronic species strife
unaffordable legacy for future,
(and perhaps alien) archeologists
who will sift thru civilization debris
with delicate knife.

Artifacts buried in heap of pulverized
and radioactive ash
civilization monuments
and hedonistic symbols
gone in a blinding brilliant flash
irksome flotsam and jetsam
spewed into outer space
alien nations light years distant
collect miniscule bits and pieces
offer object lesson as extinction
for beings that become excessively brash.
272 · Aug 2018
Reprehensible Savagery ©
'Pon reading tragic headline...,
     aye experienced grief alone,
no matter the killer (Chris Watts,
     thirty-three years
     of Frederick, Colorado) unknown
     to me, the sheer brutality,
     whereat he killed Shanann Watts,
     Bella and Celeste,

     his once adorably beautiful,
     now ceased wife
     and daughters ages thirty four,
     four, and three respectively
     (purportedly via strangulation)
     reflexively did i groan
particularly, the propensity to ****
     with in sinew weighted bone

times gone by,
     where expletive laced epithets
     incessantly did drone
nearly activating trip wires,
     a blood dripping knife,
     would be shown
to police, unless...I took my life,
     cuz immediate regret would well up

     resulting with an agonizing moan...
hence after perusing morbid
     (somewhat inexplicably fascinating)
     screaming tragedy ado
admit sadness overtook this chap,
     what wrought motive,
     (albeit premeditated)
     for him to construe

such an atrocious, ferocious,
     heinous, et cetera grew
some crime toward innocent wife
     (she supposedly knew)
intuitively felt and possibly
     foresaw the slew
how her life (a grotesque
     mass square aid )

would meet one gross violent death
intimating marriage frayed
ranking as "FAKE,"
     or Eff for failing grade
yet tidbits publicized twas shaky match
     from get go, no heaven made
nor wedded bliss -
     her precious life paid

as well two preschoolers
     (cute as a button),
and expectant third progeny (male fetus)
existence extinguished by, "killer"
     the husband, who went
     into a deadly tie raid
now guilt upon
     his conscious heavily weighed.
Argh resolution between
     self and eldest
     dear daughter more remote,
now then locating

     a left handed monkey wrench,
cuz she feels this papa
     did deliberate smote
her upside the head, knocking

     Eden Liat stone cold
     in an abysmal trench
thus, this dada doth fear a mill
     stone shaped albatross
     around thy neck aye will tote,

where rotting bird
     doth emit fetid oppressive stench
gloomily decry death asper,
     paternal progeny blighted love
     epitaph finis fate wrote.

Methinks (nee knows) marital infidelity
     steep dividend warrant wrought
chances greater finding needle in haystack
     versus pointless thought
exercise regarding deus ex machina sought
forgiveness ex post facto, rethought,
yet miracle needed, viz

     twill require against overwrought
progeny's psyche mor'n
     solo requiem Te Deum never sung,
     hence no guarantee

     father as overthought
against embarkation entailing,
     nor divine chorus baptizing can nought
assuage besotted dada's flesh, handwrought

hence fiery eternal damnation
     no gunsmoke match e'en gunfought
by Jesse James, no penitence
     bequeathed only dreadnought
visa vis admitting how affair
     kneaded joyus kindling brought

philandering husband discovered
     emotional refuge (against spousal
     epithet strewn expletive language,
     whence mistress besought
similar ****** satisfaction,
     and subsequent fallout an afterthought.

retrospective reflection stills nothing
     more serious then slap on the wrist
while engaged (~ January 2010) with
     nothing sinful 'bout peccadillo tryst

understandable wife got sorely ******
on the sly behaviour the missus
     blindsided, hence over
     looked and missed
and figurative wedge
     cleft asunder nearly kissed

our marriage goodbye
     extra-marital romp illicit,
though we nearly came to fist
sta cuffs, where salty crude name calling
in conjunction with execrable
     derogatory cussing contribution complicit.
(aunt that title niece – ???
in this context pronounced nice)

Well...hm...I really did not wanna
     let the cat out of the bag,
     and souffle, parfeit, forfeit, et cetera face
     book (waving) applause,
no...no...no...,not
     so mooch the fear of a
     dramatic plummet in popularity
     boot rather because

grabbing a tiger by the tail,
     where sharp razor like claws
will disable me to write
     any deplorable contrite ****** clause,
(certainly comes across as more
     dramatic and draws
immediate attention
     versus describing carefully

     reaching into a sack dangling
     feline treat in hand), where faux pas...
hens, this chap did not
     wanna play chicken,
     thus generally he opts
     tabby Tommie (chivalrously ****
sure gunning and figuratively
     ****** hill whipping sluggishly)

     if need be resorting
     to being the dock
tour Frankenstein of hyperbole creating
     an outrageously monstrously
     "FAKE" er...ad hoc
and let the poetic shenanigans rip
     riding on Lone Ranger as ****
key guiding a pretend winged Pegasus

     shouting "Hi-**, Silver" until...lock
jaw sets in forcing me to transition
     into emulation mock
apple pie de core'm
     imaginatively strutting pompously
     with fanfare and a shock
absorber of motley crue depeche mode
     with vanilla ice...SCREAM,
    
     (oh my dog)
     a HUMUNGOUS MOLTEN rock
iz gonna knock me
     upside the head
     (as if any body would notice)
      any difference in ma schlock
key, schmaltzy, and
     scholarly (ha) zany appeal

(yeah..yeah...yeah...
     wishful thinking) doth congeal
well...essentially aye may feel
absolutely awful (methinks I contracted
     gnome mo' money
     knee feverish blues)
actually, ah haint goot any
     handy dandy spongebob

     squarepants squidward clues
how ma zanily uncanny,
     and quirky brain flues
spew out such...
     gibberish, which attempts
     to be ja panned off as
     highly lauded literary endeavor
twitchy versatile rhyme

     without a reason open
     to interpretations, sans
     many words for snow or igloos
Eskimos own (well...mebbe not of late,
     what with global warming),

     ah cold old news
as opposed to deciphering
     these enigmatic wordy rues
a signature trademark of
      my swiftly styled
     harried tailored alphabetic schmooze!
271 · Jun 2023
Hiccups
An involuntary spasm
of the diaphragm
and respiratory organs,
with a sudden closure
of the glottis
and a characteristic
sound like that of a cough.

Rather mundane topic
lest one cursed
with said minor inconvenience
that subsequently manifests
into protracted health crisis.

I write much hiccup ado
about nothing, which
involuntary explosive release
comes clear out of the hiccup blue
nary a sponge bob
square pants handy dandy blues clue,
where in tarnation
this uncontrollable bout
jarring the Jimmy Neutron body
electric all's well
that ends well hiccup do.

Why such physiological
spasmodic trembling
undulating weird phenomena
uncontrollable peculiar singultus kickstarts,
where one of many
extreme measures now suggested
such as ramming cloven hoofs
down the gullet wool shear
lee be in vain
to bring closure of glottis hiccups ewe

you wool sheepishly  
moost likely find annoying
as this hiccupping buck feels few
breaths short of taking
another potential drastic action…
like hiccup swallowing glue
as an extreme solution
wide whirled, webbed series
of being held hostage
resorting to asking Horton hears a Who

to stomp his elephant legs
(also known as hottentot bread)
atop thee abdominal chest
(me not ribbing ye dear reader)
despite impossible mission
to escape, thus truncating mein kampf
and additional fail safe measure
being trundled to an igloo
serving as ice cold emergency room
of a mockup hospital or calling

on the ghost of  the late veterinarian
James Herriot to scare doggone
such hiccup caterwauling
catering to gentile
or skeletal anorexic
hunger artist appropriately named Jew
Lean, thus, time and again
when said hiccup affliction
holds me hiccup hostage
ye dear stranger knew

seeking cure twill drive me towards
considering additional outrageous
acts of desperation
such as sticking ma head in the loo,
which bizarre reaction
on par with holding
out an appetite
until famished for moo
goo guy pan mixed
with delicious bowl of new

dulls steeped in broth,
an island delicacy renown on Oahu
even this atheist would ask
for salivation praying in a pew,
whereby sound of silence
echoed by hiccup right on queue
when nary a burble
until reaching amen hiccup rue
stubbornly persists,
no matter resorting

to consider extreme unction measures
at suppressing explosive strew
wing upsurge of diaphragm,
accursed diabolical solution
holding breath until
turning blue in the face  
simultaneously forcing air thru
alternative orifices such as:
nasal passage and/or mouth, ears
or out derrière as last ditch effort.

Oft times physiological phenomena  
faintly resembles bobbing up and down
analogous to the celebrated
jumping frog of Calaveras County
seriousness one best not undervalue
with a snort
lest ye surpass one poor soul
when an accident
on June 13, 1922,

Charles Osborne  
(experienced 20 to 40
involuntary diaphragm
spasms per minute)
hiccupped nonstop,
which condition persisted
for more than six decades,
only ending in 1990,
a full 68 years after it began.

Osborne's plight remains
the longest attack
of hiccups confirmed
by Guinness World Records
invariably accompanied
no doubt by a voodoo
Practitioner…until…at last whew
hiccups stopped  mysteriously
as they started
bringing relief
to him who analogously felt like
caged primate in a zoo.
Asper daily expounding fostering
     inchoate manifesting mod
     er writ writing quality,
     solitary scrimmage tackling
     undertaking, yielding whir
ring, sputtering, kickstarting, and
     buzz-feeding at competitive, communal
     crowed did metaphorical trough,

     where household named author's
     top New York Times best seller
     tier, overshadowing under
rated genre bending, breakout aspiring,
story board qualifying,
     opportunistic newbie man
     use script artful dodgers
     mere dust collecting drafts,

anticipating to stir infectious interest
     incumbent - at mercy,
     tripwire activating quint
essential key, which anchors print
ting projected uncertain
     popularity first edition,
     awakening, guiding, nosing
     asymptote analogy steering

    reader toward nascent
scribe, where paper
     back writer wannabe,
     toils away incorporating subtle
     (hook, line and sinker) techniques,
(albeit apropos literary
     ploys, a true test tum ment,
viz sophisticated gambits

     to massage late tint
prestidigitation abra ca dab rah,
     sine non qua cogent
see kant, and tangent triggers
     modest mien fortified, exemplified,
     and downplayed akin
     to unassuming Clark Kent
in his cape ably nonchalant

     transformation into superman,
     and/or more pointedly,
     some original heft leant
to set apart striking
     poignant implement
exhibited by aspiring
     writer daily revising,
     albeit gal or gent

his/her uniquely obscure
     trademark, but
     eventually keen agent
assays non-boastful writing style
     im prim mature print,
     sans unassuming swiftly tailored
     harried style seduces seek
     curing sincere overnight reverent,

well deserved kudos
     comically marveling
     at thee most im portent
     salient strengths, per
     hops hue moored opulent
quality instigates
     affinity toward nascent,
bar riddle be, bill leading,

     bud ding scrivener,
     not necessary alluding
     to a hypothetical outlier
thus, any similarity between the
     above statement and
     a living person perchance named
     Matthew Scott Harris
     purely coincidental.
269 · Nov 2017
November 13th 2017
Happy 83rd birthday to thy cremated mom

Harriet Harris fought tooth and nail
Mother succumbed
to terminal illness without fail
Ovarian/ Uterine Cancer to no avail
hosted by death feasted fancy
at Oyster Bay metastasized inducing this male
the sol son to grapple as psyche didst ail.
***********
Major organs compromized grim reaper and
carried corpse into dead zone as a keeper brand
donned as one Canarsie flashy dame grand
ball room dancer didst skittered in right hand
side o' me noggin, the idea flit ta left land
of gray matter thru me mined task didst ex panned

foregoing bidding on e-bay, ruminate how trite
online shenanagins, never asking nor knowing spite
most likely raged within yar being,
which lack of filial duty haint right
to be near where psyche flails quite
understandably, but no matter matthew scott

never did ask, how emotions most clear aflame
with anger writhing asper your terminal plight
vis a vis injustice to ****** desire with shroud of night
arising each morning to brilliant light

ye, thy lover of life becoming ashen gray
with recurring incomplete bucket list that may
already, a dozen plus years ago - neigh
aye methinks, so much deprived of grandchildren ply
their oars thru the time stream, how **** sigh
to partake whence thee drew final breath thy
avoid seeing thee stiffen with rigor mortis, why...

did unlucky dice throw of fate
rob and steal unattained goals ye strove with grate
fully before out bidden by dead souls, who hate
mortals to complete, thus truncate a lifelong mate
to papa, whom recouped severe loss, though his pate

undoubtedly flits with remembrance
of thee one he did highly rate
despite occasions, where spats hood did vitiate

this son feels he did not booster morale at all
with Huzzah, but stood mute in proximity
when ye didst call
in kitchen of century old stone
mansion built and hall

ways echo wing the absence sans pall
in droning sounds of silence, a squall
vacuumed a key per, a gal fairly tall
whose son now reflects how many a wall
he figuratively erected shuttered from y'all

that home razed, yet memory of complex edifice
still intact, averse to let eyes sweep, the home I miss
analogous to house at Pooh’s Corner
viz shared with a younger and older loving sis

both edging into their twilight zoned time on earth
re: the outer limits of expected longevity, yet stoking
the coals essence of each their respective hearth
324 Level Road Collegeville above recaptured
with recollections of merriment and mirth
oft occasions this sol heir withholding telling worth

thee ness, and must therefore purge such grief
considerably less than when pages
of me life seemed like a shuffled sheaf
or soon after yar demise, a sense of drowning
without recourse to being rescued,
nor near enough to grasp hold of any reef

that home stead, blessedly played important role
constituent key residence like quasar pole
sated light years removed from civilization, when goal
acquisition February 28th 1968 won land slide cole

essence tract of idyllic radiance upon open space
already slated tubby outfitted, transformed for race
sing urbanity asper mobile Americans at a pace
greater than mother nature shows amazing grace
as commercialization takes charge and doth efface,

the once bucolic, ecologic, and idyllic
forces this sentimental sir
to latch upon steady brace
bemoaning and tempted to take ace

hip of hemlock to forego discontent with bing hue
man, who cherished tender mother-son glue
and wondrous tribulation, 
I harbored enshrined and unwittingly flew
from pristine sanctuary secured
deeply in consciousness,

which access to retrieve circumstances
of myself as a boy still dwells in this man shun - clew
less nothing can recreate, nor reconstruct boyhood,
teenage and adult hood pangs
scare me wide-awake
whar frightful dreams serve as boo

stirring of dormant sentiment,
especially thee 13th day n 11th month
of each year
the aura, charisma, and persona, veer
dims sum milk of human kindness bequeathed tear
ring inner sanctum, where
this offspring doth miss his mum, he doth rare
lee shed light, only when faux pause (all faux)
aye scrawl a mini opus knowing you will

never be cognizant, extant, for me to grant mere
cathartic expunging in situ flowing emotions hear
able only to live kith and kin or
akin to Rapunzel unfurling tress buffeted hair

inside my being for love unspoken dare
ring father hood got taught true value, sans two beautiful
grand daughters ye would marvel
poignant traits, and disbelief that this bare
wren wove within DNA lasses who usher an air.
a limning rush of sinister
     fiery angry flames bent avast
analogous copse,
     where every limb bough, bore full

     roaring furnace hot blast
spewing weighty incendiary volcanic
     magmatic eruption out classed

Krakatoa, no longer the benchmark,
     sans most powerful trajectory arc
this latest supernatural phenomena poetic
     pre sent dent trumpeting not don
     shearing, slamming,

     and stripping off tree bark
(most definitely paging the innocuous Clark
Kent, where like loess lain
     during Pleistocene Epoch
     rendered, manifested dark

kenning shroud likened
    to world wide webbing em brace
where lava floes easily did
     (like a poetic souped up Chevy)
     out to chase innocent prey
smoothing over (akin to mason,

     or gigantic glazier) clearly shining deface
of planet Earth with a smooth glassy like face
though starkly barren, bereft, bilked
     every last trace of civilization
     nonetheless exhibiting amazing grace

which global catastrophic event poo tin brake
fast upon ONE haughty, egoistic
     arrogant **** Sapiens chief drake
particularly ***** king machine "FAKE"

superman usurping free reign crowning himself
     totalitarian American tyrant,
     bare ring his right arms
emulating gesticulation sans dictatorship

     of the Proletariat make
pact with credo of Karl, Harpo,
     Groucho, and Chico Marx,
     where mortals DID NOT quake
especially empowered youths
     asper grassroots action they did take.
269 · Jun 2019
First Amendment In Jeopardy
Lifeblood of democracy hemorrhaging
ousting the "FAKE" president only recourse
to staunch impending grim demise,
since forefathers drafted
United States Constitution
ratified more'n two centuries ago

hoi polloi must take to the streets
denouncing severe curtailment
impinging sacred freedom of speech
linkedin with paramount bedrock provision
accessing unvarnished flint ****** "truth,"
nonetheless commander in chief

he quakingly, staunchly, vociferously...
excoriates, lacerates, repudiates...
one damning hermetically sealed,
iniquitous airtight, vacuum packed
flagrant misuse of power,
(not to mention nepotism)

invidious, insidious, injurious... infractions
incontestable, incontrovertible, contemptible...
significant melange in führer
re: hating deplorably
crooked basely barren
factual exposé after another,

deft correspondents all not quiet
along western front
(I heard Maria - mull remark)
bring "to light" execrable,
lamentable reprehensible...
gross transgressions

commander in chief
significantly overstepped
Pulitzer prize winning
prestigious storied publications
scathingly trounced, pillaried,
lambasted, insulted, denounced,

butchered, critiqued, demonized,
fricassed, gored, humiliated,...
pummeled, quartered, reviled
courageously expounding fiend
ensconced within his Taj Mahal

impregnable donjon, whereat he trumpets
laurels asper, nonpareil administration
laying groundless accusations
baring his white fangs,
twittering, naysaying, mocking.. supreme
renown gifted by "honest Abe"

recalcitrant commander in chief,
who refutes objectionable
dogged investigative journalism
every step of the way,
where dedicated news gatherers
risk life and limb

firing line reportage troopers
ferreting (foxlike) he/she
doth gopher precious nuggets
uncover alarming undisputable details
impossible to refute raw bits
agent provocateur freely colluding

immediately hashtashed poppycock
smarmy, snooty, snappy
beastly capital one ogre
blatantly castigating diligent endeavors
oblivious pie in sky
delusional egotistic haughtiness
bobblehead vilified by silent majority.
Thine distorted reflection rippled
within rain maker's pool
   upon a midnight clear
full moonlight sonata
   flooded shallow abyss,
cleaved fractal structures of silence
reverberating deathly hallow from 'ere
to infinity, whence magic wand
whipped out from
   whereabouts unknown

wove disenchanting spell
   atop me shaded noggin more'n
   fifty ruffle lake  suns
   Dorian Gray pictured here
to fore, awakened
   from drunken stupor,
whence sober self

saw repulsive trouper
   fluid dynamic image jeer
at *** bellied, dead panned,
and ad libbed the mere
ore image lam bent,
   mutilated spindled
various horrid aspects of
   myself nine inch
   rusty nails impaired

which, aghast at such
   creepy distortion i didst rear
like a bucking bronco unclear
how this horrid, jagged,
   limned paragon did wear
a grotesque disfigured Joeseph Conrad
   lost within heart of darkness – maybe Zaire

or Zulu-land, this
   soaked silhouette half bare
from waist to head showed unmanly
sagging overly engorged *******
plus right and left elephant sized ear
egad, THAT CANNOT BE ME,

yet upon performing
   self exam a glare
ring outburst ensued,
cuz thy once
   bronzed handsome physique
now grist for a Joker to jeer
and fodder made
   for television series created,
directed, and executed by Norman Lear
which role might be
   temporary for Halloween, but near
lee every SINGLE day and night,
thy aged dusk fraught hominid ******,
leaped, pooh poohed I ham ill prepared

to accept, roistering, rollicking,
rueing this Frankenstein scarred
complex deplorable edifice able,
ready, and willing to be tarred
rather than evince flabbiness,
gruesome homeliness, instance

when no objection would arise
to live out the remaining days of this life
as the world wide web turns, spins, rattles...
and voluntarily sign myself into a stew ward
with (at minimum ), a ghoulish, gnarly,
gummy self activated door

leading to privet hedge row trimmed
topiary resplendent yard
cuz every cotton pickin, friggin,
fingerhut lickin portal iz barred
dated Friday the thirteenth
   with **** face on that card!
Homage to the furry four footed a mew zing friend that smart pet house cat whose nine lives spanned nearly a score. This ode scratched out about a half dozen ***** of yarn unspooled around the terra firmae.
---------------------------------------------------------­-----------------------
the euthanize cat silenced meow –
less audible than when a kitten 19 years ago – whew
heart wrenching to you
Richard n I presume Brendan too

though ye my dear sister will moost likely miss do
to sensitive resonance with creatures that grew
and an omnipotent bond through
well nigh two decades - whereby a tapestry of love hew

as pet owner solely knew
wove with colorful memories will brew
regular need to grieve as a family member true
as yar own flesh and bone will wake thee no more – boo

hoo
lament must be free to woo
tears of sadness possible prompt thine heart to rue
tis only understandable if such conscionable choice to
terminate life one such beautiful feline knew

within his being affection lavished with memories to view
and replay his corporeal presence where time flew
as calendar ushered near score longevity
   end date along timeline queue

memorialized n sentimentalized
   by unused litter box n cat bowl used to poo
and chew
respectively will usher inxs purr remembrance of thinks past

by Marcel Proust of human zoo
leaves inky traces without a clew
his latter fading discernible

   holographic soul with any faux paws
dagger like claws indelibly etched
   within mcgeehan family unforgettable presence he drew!
-----------------------------------------------------------­---------------------
…luv frum ur brother math who
moost now rush off n skip to the loo!
for now please imagine generic
     fairy tale characters
     analogous if you will
to possessing physical, livingsocial,
     and three dimensional
     corporeal form (at least until
the end of this poem), and compared
     to computer generated imagery

     makes this request rill
lee not that impossible,
     far-fetched, or difficult,
     and most likely already
     a done deal, hence nill,
null, and void might
     stop the average
     Joe, Jack or Jill

dead in their poetic iambic feet,
but would defeat
     the purpose i.e, ****
and bring to abrupt violent end
my (very questionable)
     "FAKE" purpose plus,
     disallow me to distill
crazy literary whim of mine swill

culled via injecting
     lifelike characteristics
     into morality tale creations,
     perhaps first heard
     as nursery rhymes, drill
ling moral, perchance told
     to your own chill
**** in tandem

     with Cain and Able
by the likes of
     Aesop, Brothers Grimm,
     or Greco-Roman myths assume
Chicken Little, Casandra, and the Boy
     Who Cried Wolf maybe
     owned reason sound ding doom
and gloom alarm, and ignored

     at their own peril,
     when subsequent "FAKE" fume
issued turned out to be bigly,
     yuge fire and fury
     actual threat didst loom
     (way before Trump
     coopted those elicit terms),
and truly aye wonder

     no lawyer got
     called for said room
errs, which revision would
     make them more apropos
     for today and tomb
morrow, when generations

     of future boys and girls,
     yet tubby conceived
     in the womb
hence law suits would result
     into bajillion dollars
     costs would zoom.
Today marks fourth anniversary of tragic deaths
an aching breaking heart – mine
remembers four extinguished breaths.

(dashed – not while riding off
in a white horse open sleigh,
but upon learning untimely demise
regarding prosperous family, whose small
plane crashed August 8, 2019.

They lived ~ three doors down from us
farther than one can toss a Buffalo nickelback.)

The victims included;
Jasbir Khurana, 60
(a professor of pathology
and laboratory medicine
at Temple University's
Lewis Katz School of Medicine);
Divya Khurana, 54 (a professor
of pediatrics and neurology
at the Drexel University
College of Medicine,
specializing in pediatrics, sleep) ;
and the couple's youngest daughter
Kiran Khurana 19 years old.

No words can assuage the deep sorrow,
this once upon a time neighbor
(I lived at 1148 Greentree Lane) experienced
disbelief, numbness, shock...
attendant by an irreparable loss of beloved,
and vacillated how to communicate
heartfelt (I cannot ex spleen) sympathy,
where words superfluous,
yet... if for that challenge alone,
an affinity with language

spurred impulse to focus upon
bountiness of joie de vivre
imbibed years gone by,
when every now and
again chance encounters
found yours truly (me)
in delightful company
regarding persons whose presence
imbued benevolence, kindness, warmth...
facilitating emotional philanthropy

influenced long term positive memories
to one experienced being
outcast, ostracized, offensive...
courtesy unfortunate series
of circumstances beyond my control,
which voiced unwelcome tension
sabotaged reaching quality politeness
displeased at unfriendly reactions
reflexively, maliciously, impetuously...
did little or no justice

toward conflict resolution
which altercations nearly,
quickly did segway profoundly
into unpleasant standoffs,
yes bias, bigotry, bitterness
begat bisel meshuga
acutely aware I loathe
uncouth actions regarding myself
and strive to remain
affable, cordial, friendly...,

hence an object lesson,
(albeit ex post facto)
to abide by my inner integrity,
ethos, dogma politesse...,
especially when pitted against
unsavory electric acid kool aid test
tis then urgently vital to remain
steadfast, and figuratively
turn the other cheek
particularly when populace

under severe duress
re: instigated by pathologically
belligerent, ill mannered, rude...
former president whose
set abhorrent precedence,
whereby people of nation follow suit,
yet this nonconformist only hopes
to affect positive within
webbed wide world at large.
268 · Nov 2017
wallet blues
268 · Dec 2021
Quirky suave Unitarian
After most recent shower,
and particularly washing hair
(then shaking head
analogous to sopping wet dog
drying her/himself after a bath),
I immediately said helloo
to Long lasting fragrance Suave
essentials Daily Clarifying
Deep cleansing Shampoo,
which permeated mine scalp
facilitating healthy follicles.

More so frothy lather upon noggin
after getting rinsed out
yielded bounteous, luscious, luxurious,
and marvelous full bodied tresses
reminiscent when yours truly an adolescent,
a veritable long haired pencil necked geek
whose hirsute trademark
still characterizes atypical sexagenarian
above mentioned characteristic
still (after scores of years)
emblematic of this enigmatic poetaster.

Ever since being in utero
soon after seminal fusion
insync with fallopian tube bearing ova
begot zygote courtesy said gametes,
and engendered silent boom
after piercing zona pellucida
creating microscopic flume,
nevertheless collection of cells
coalescing into embryo
eventually manifesting into yours truly,

I painstakingly took minuscule
comb and brush to groom,
and dreaded most fearfully being locked,
where pair of outsize scissors did loom
threatening to cut thick,
what could best be envisioned analogous
to imperceptible fancy plume
hich features specific feature
drew medical community
(i.e. namely human reproductive specialists)

constituted extensive expanse
within blastocyst very limited room
crowd sourcing out rivaling curious onlookers
formerly geared up
to espy King Tutankhamun's tomb
can you dear reader believe
a hairy globule within the womb
became global attraction
viz - of a young fecund Harriet Harris,
cuz about nine months later
out the birth canal I did zoom.
less than half a dozen hours
   remain here in Lake Woebegone,
an idyllic enclave, where legal tender,
   liquid assets, minted monies
   by the metric ton
loot, et cetera replaced
   with sharing home good humor spun
prevarication, or a pun
where this Norwegian bachelor farmer,

   now sets timer counting down to the one
hundred and fifth International Women's Day,
   hence dada's taxi service necessitated
   (asper my own volition) none
forsaking a substantial block of time
to ferry (via 2009 Hyundai Sonata)
   thine eldest (of deux
darling damsels doggedly, diligently,

   and definitively) whose maternal hue
ma in instincts (staking out
   vocational, interpersonal, Jew
dish hiss lee courting biological objectives
   Since matriculating
   At University Of  Pennsylvania
   she seriously eyed
   the engineering curriculum,

   and as an inherent
   high achieving civilian, this rugged
   cerebral terra firmae terrain
   emitting a signal calling she knew

tubby meant foe her, thus this proud papa his new
wish availing self less father summoned,
   pressed, and mustered joyriding
   glommed within mental motor queue

thus despite experiencing a minor panic attack
   (with nausea more pronounced than usual), aye
did not want Eden (her first name)
   to feel disgruntled toward pop (hood rather die)

as opposed to slacking off where fatherhood
   concerned strove to be a beneficial guy
especially before the stroke of midnight
   will usher well nigh

till next year long overdue attention,
   now bequeathed during these twenty four hours
   when non gun shy
textile women (shunted subaltern
   second class workers)
   in New York (circa 1907),

   but said event opened to dispute,
   but less in doubt
   historical records indicate
   1914 International Women's Day held on March 8
   since then continued along
   a linkedin chain in case you wondered why.
(***** dental deeds done dirt cheap,
yet...aye value, treasure, revere...those
loosely fading cutting edge com man
dubble size memories.)

(Witch role an
   unavoidable mandatory phase),
that nowadays breaks the piggybank
   like a dropped fragile vase
you most likely nod
   assent if offspring  grown,
   or ponder new found challenge
   expectant motherhood costs of progeny
   take the following
   precendent all ways.

Deux daughters desiduous teeth comprise
   sum total of forty milky pearl white
whereat each healthy tooth
   a miraculous bite size bit
   of jaw dropping wizardry in vite
tasty morsel to get chewed,
   until at some arbitrary time
   (incumbent on each

   individual biological clock),
   the second set thwart aside
   (or sometime literally override)
   these baby choppers right
fully as sought after
   treasures for the tooth fairy
   (oft time disguised as part  
   of canine corp) offer sterling sight,

but fascinating as
   each replicated, punctuated,
   lacteal dentition adorned
   with a pulp,
   dentin, enamel, and cementum quite
a complex miniature edifice,
   or a more apropos
   metaphor fielding sprite

   would be a picket fence
   with important slats,
   and thus a challenging plight
arises when a child
   shows their mother or father
   gapped smile, and understands
   to place tooth
   under pillow at night

when quiet as a mouse,
   (who to be honest
   create scratching
   sounds) the might
tee tooth fairy,
   doth descend (nowadays
   resort to global positioning
   satellite application)

   to find their way
   without turning on the light
soundless and still
   as a dust mote
   feign being a knight
less to rescue a damsel, maybe
   one baby step
   ahead of her/his insight

expecting to disover
   a modest *** of cash,
   if stood on end,
   rather sizable in height
and essentially
   necessitating po' papa
   to take out a loan,
   or hope flight

   of fancy wish to win lottery,
   which would excite
   self or spouse, but
   reality in league  
   with the fickle finger
   of fate doth
   disappoint and delight

son or daughter
   boasting to classmates,
   how the rich tooth fairy
   (iz actually a faux pas
   sham shaman, dirt
   poor father, bled dry,

   whose coutenance
   (visible after break of day)  
reflects that of one,
   who barely survived a catfight
with finances in tatters as if
   one money hungry
   toothless fairy took a bite.
266 · May 2019
Nobel Lionized Matriarchy
Freely forming metrical mainstays
poetic occasion to phrase
the fairer and gentler ***,
thus the following turns of phrase
to bestow acknowledgement

regarding wonderful wise ways
of collective she who assays
to create safe/secure home/ hearth
as bedrock and fount of ample
maternal duties tiredly sashays

with keeping house receiving praise
the second Sunday each May, her
tired body sprawled on chaise
lounge, perhaps basking in solar rays
communing with Gaia, who ****
bruiting with sky goddess

defying forecasters prediction, no slate grays
pose dampening effect on huzzahs
regaling torchbearer diploid as amaze
zing newlife, where loving labor pays
more than fine spun gold cherishing
offspring in her nurturing ways.

Paean dutiful daily deference, I dole
ensconced with pineapple getup
surfing the cyber sea, this hyperbowl
lee, yet deserved dignity deifying dames,
who bear brunt whole
ding potent biological reproductive role

de facto duty honorably decreed
tribute paid despite commercialized
money making hyped up rigamarole,
nonetheless yours truly accentuates sole
sans, progenitor of human race
saddled with disproportionate/ unfair toll.
266 · Aug 2018
Anemic Checking Account
This Citizen Banker
     safely in his compound doth attest,
sans donning his typical
     gabbling and trumpeting ways,
     while legally tendered,
     currently being cents
     less lee swept away
     soul fully - bellow

     wing from my chest
(with fortissimo, the
     whirling wide webbed
     watery tidal swells
     rivaling the peak
     of Mount Everest)
reef furring to being
     nearly reduced to poverty

     hence, essentially buck
     king the tide while washed out -
     since day short and dollar late
     circumstantes force me
     to cash worthless buffalo chips
     astutely as you correctly guessed
from deep pull horrible
     United States economic situation,

     where option non
     existent against invest
ting, nesting, and squirreling
     financial resources jest
accessible for wealthy people
     to sync investment portfolios
     region of popular tax haven,
     viz Cayman Islands lest

hefty costs accrue
    keeping scrupulously stashed re:
     sources untouchable,
     where Uncle Sam canst
     access ex cell lent
     healthy maturing outlook
     king monies, and understandable
     at rage against the machine

     if rainy day funds messed
up, but solvent versus
     debts drowning oneself
     unable to stay afloat,
where declaring Chaper 7 bankruptcy
   doomed to bobbing
     within a sinking boat,
and where pointless

     to pull out all the whistle stops
     including abandoning resorting
     to heroic measures
     while additionally futile
     to shed tears and emote
only kidding self to seek out goat
tam ma Buddha, nor will
     I resort to gofundme

(cuz ma last name NOT Kardashian),
     but matter of fact lee
roll with the figurative punches
     feigning tubby Jew Dee
or an incarnation
     of Muhammad Ali
during his ready for prime time Box
sing rebellious jabbering

left fist out fox
sing prize fighter un
     defeated champ with mox
see, his champion modesty
     oozed muscles like rocks,
a bankable one man
     Gibraltar with precious
     mettle to the core,

not wanting with his pugilistic,
yet homegrown genteel
     ringing true mark
solid core state athletically valued
bankable bonded stocks.
264 · Sep 2018
Vagaries of life
(conceived while in utero
which loosely summarization in toto
of this ordinary Joe Schmoe,
who did wade nine months for a roe
at mercy of obstetricians status quo,

giving me a jump start to blend pro
pen city utilizing both a very small oboe,
and comination cross bow
either plucking or shooting from off
     umbilical cord mocks nocks notched arrow.
          
Biological copulation draws, etches, fashions
genesis hewing, inscribing jeweled kismet,
legislating miraculous novitiate officiating
poignant outcome quintessential reproduction
seminarians theological universal vocalization

whittling ** xy yearning zealously, zestfully
aggregating begotten cell diminutive elementary
fecund gametes glommed gooey honied
insulated joined kindled live miniscule netizen
outlook plenti qualified readied simulacrum

thrumming undifferentiated voiceless wisp,
xpert yin/yang zygote (adroit bitcoin currency)
describing extemporaneous fusion generates
hormonal influx juices kickstarting life

manifold natural occurrence pregnancy
quilts rudimentary secrete tapestry until vicar
wizard yields zealous adorable biological
concatenation, derivative extrapolated

filigreed ****** helped induce jointly
knotted linkedin minecraft nascent
ovulation presaging quintessential
reproduction, sharing trimesters, umbilical
venerated womb yearning Zen.

Amazing baby, credit deoxyribonucleic
acid, enigma fantastically grand husband
injected jetted klatch, leaving microscopic
nothings, opportunistically pierced quarters,
readied shutterfly trap, ****** vibrantly
welded x2c yoked Zappa.

A bun cooks definitive enchilada, formula
generations hardy induce jimmied kin,
labored maternal newborn, one pricked
queue, randiness spurred ****** ubiquitously,
voyaged whimpering xing yelper zings.

Adoration bequeathed commencing doting
eyeing, fondling, giving heartfelt infusion
joyus kindred living momentous novel
offspring perpetrate quickening rapport

subjected treatment unequivically validates
wonderful Xit yolking bearable delivery
fostering  heavenly joy kneading,
legitimizing, masterminding nascent

ontogenesis pacifying quivering reverentially
terminating viability, where yips align  
crying embryo finis gestating heralding
jubilant loving natural parental reverence.

Reality inundates the full term off
spring upon a lifelong journey (initially as a
foreigner sans in utero), but willfulness viz
life source secures survivor against pinging

peccadilloes learning by trial and error to iron
out kinks as one among the human league
since modus operandi transcend encumbrances
triggers built in impetus to traverse potential

pitfalls along the space/time continuum trajectory
which adversity only serves to net greater strength
since that instantaneous and spontaneous bitmap
encoded upon conception.
Twenty plus years ago cap’n Matthew Scott
   twittered n burst with ahoy
on account of thine first borne –
   unbeknownst to us then if a girl or boy
so an assortment of gender appropriate names –
   some brazen others coy
filled pages of our journals sans
   newly minted parents viz endless employ
though of Semitic ancestry choices per namesake
   reflected more of a goy
which genealogy less significant than that this precious progeny moi

healthy genetically whipped miracle – crème of the crop
that only imaginary dragons with fiery lyrics could drop
whereby thee flute tour ring notes induce the crowd to hip hop
calisthenics that emulate the swishing brush strokes of a mop
which if attempted by myself, would witness one sic pop

so, he sticks would ranks viz his literate *** spur ray shun to confess
those thermostatic and temperature controlled emotions more or less
extolling the occasions that hold poignancy,
   though as a first time father
   my state of managing a new-born felt chaotic and a sorry mess
though words may resonate less with Eden, she may dispute that YES

yet over the ensuing years – the integration of off spring  
did/does an indelible invaluable psychic ring
whereby, that awkward role no longer on a par as a foster child
   for her existence (albeit demanding at times)
   likened as special offering
whose absence doth make mine heart grow fonder, yet mandatory
   to let go of this biological part of me
   so to another happiness she can bring

though…a mixed bag of emotions most likely roil
inside her corporeal being, I praise n prize accomplishments
   spurred by natural borne desires to become independent
   rather than shutter oneself up (as exemplified by das papa)
   who still writhes for many explorations of self discovery thwarted
   renting my psyche with mailer daemons still on the prowl
   essentially predicting remaining years of emotional n financial toil

especially pronounced,
   I know this star student suffered sheer agony
when asked – by classmates -  the vocations of me
or “mother abby’, which torturous moments
   fueled means to destroy myself
   cuz of this utter embarrassment, misery, writhing really
vociferously within genetic blend, whose love
   not asked for nor sought unequivocally!
--------------------------------------------------­----
DESPITE MY ACTIONS, BEHAVIORS, CHILDISH FOOLISHNES, I WOULD SOONER HARM MYSELF THAN DO ANY FURTHER INJUSTICE TO YE – ME FIRST BORN BABY!
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