Shuttling between foster homes
life shaped me
to who I am,
while love and hypocrisy
played hide and seek
I drowned my real self.

Now I stand
on the road's end
looking for directions,
while passers by
stare at me
asking each other,
'Lost sanity, isn't she?'

I look on
baleful eyes
silent and wondering:
if life gave me choices,
where would I stand?


'

A crescent moon

glows white

with

It's angelic

halo through

a shroud of

dark clouds,

soulmates

within the

shower of the

pouring rain,

love

Is the only

true sense

that's felt

when the

desert

Is misted

In dunes, when

the souls begin to feel

the depths of warmth

and the monsoon revives

the barren sands, and all

Is paradise.

Feet are the best place to look in a crowd
because,
even if they aren’t painted,
toenails offer a reflective surface
that reassures our presence,
no matter the floor we walk on.
I look down so often
that I forget I have that identical shell
on my fingers too.
They shine the sun in your eyes
when I blindly fix my hair behind my ear.
I know it disgusts you,
but I bite away,
in fact,
I chew that casing away
from my forgiving palms
and tuck them safely in my nail beds
where I drip bedtime stories from my gums
like a blanket fort of crimson comfort.
My stories get so crusted
on the nights when
you’re not here
that scar tissue
becomes less than something I blow my nose with.
I long for you
to tell me your stories
and let them faint into my wrists
so then I can carry your pulse
through my veins and feel alive again.
Let your heartbeat
guide my wandering hands
down your ventricles
and let me be the reason you stir at night.
Let me shake your bones
until the birds trapped in your rib cage
start singing again.
Let me be the cool tongue that
laps your broken heart back together.
Let me be something more than debris
hanging loosely from flesh,
but less than a bomb nestled
between the hollowness in your skull.
I hope you look down
and feel the weight of my lips from last night’s goodbye
pressed against your forehead
and realize
no matter how lost you get
in a swarm of shoes,
you’ll always have my bare feet
next to yours.

“Edith Black” By Emily Austin

I felt my wife's hand grace my shoulder.
I brought my hand to hers, held it and I told her
“I love you Edith Black”
But she doesn't say it back.

I heard my wife humming through our old crickety house.
I got up and I told my beautiful darling spouse
“I love you Edith Black”
But she doesn't say it back.

I smell my wife making coffee at about half past one.
I follow the scent and I tell my dear sweet hon
“I love you Edith Black”
But she doesn't say it back.

I remember the olden days.
I remember when she used to say
“I love you Alan Black.”
And I'd always say it back.

I can no longer take her hand in mine
Or see her smile of bright sunshine
But only in my head
For my darling Edith Black
is dead.

If I could change one simple thing
I'd bring her back so she could sing.
Or just so I could say
“I love you Edith Black”
And have her say it back.

Get out of my dreams
I don't want you there
Let me sleep in peace not in pieces I want to rest
In peace
Instead you rip   me to shreds
You leave that feeling
The one that happens when I think of you and your dream-self powers through
You always act up, betray me, leave me to rot
And I always think of you in that way, whether you like it or not
My mind has a way of warning me, subconsciously so
That you're not worth it, and that you're worth letting go

Could I touch you for a moment
--Could I please just touch you?
"No."
But I want to feel your sorrow
"I already told you. Go."

I can't leave you here without me
I can't ever find the way
To remember that you want me gone,
But forget the pain of what you say

"You're not helping make this better
You can't sense the way I feel
'Cause right now, as much as ever
You can never see what's real"

What's real is I'll always love you
What's true is all that I've said
What you didn't seem to notice
Is that I'll love you 'til I'm dead

"Well, then love me far away"
So you still think this is right?
"Love me for the time you had me."
I have treasured every night

Let me make up every light of day
That you were not my sun
Show me all the things you loved in me
I'll recreate every one

I'm sorry for any single glance
That was not into your eyes
For that blink that made me miss the trace
Of troubles in disguise

"Oh, what's the use, you pitiful soul?
I thought you'd seen it start
Once another stole my breath away,
I took from you my heart."