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Your flickering tongue
Can either be the heaven through my moans
Or the devil through my heartbreak.
you kiss my forehead
to tell me that
everything will be okay
but im not sure

you have become my
security blanket
a person to rely on
a place to put my feelings on
its too late

i dont think i can stay away
the connection
unlike any before
why does all good
things have to be so

******* bad?

what if i dont want it to be bad?

what if i can make things right?

what if i dont want my fantasies to remain a distant dream?

im tired of
being good
i want to be yours
i know,
dreams are fools talk
gibberish that spills from their months
but maybe i want to be love's idiot....

ive resisted so much
you are my every desire
my every thought
my secret obsession
that i dont think i want to go away
anytime soon.....

(b.d.s.)
To reassure me
You utter softly
                    "Just think of me
                     As a cookie
                     You've been dying to eat
"
...
I'm nervous
My hands are shaking
When I place them on your knees

Sure
I've tasted hard lollipops before
And they were easy to take in my mouth
As my lips formed around them.

But I've never had a sugar cookie
Quite like this before
With a goddess
Quite like you

Your voice is calm
Collected
But weighed down
Over the sound of my panting
As your fingers tangle in my hair
                    "Relax"

My body twitches with excitement
Anxiety
Because I want to please you
But I don't know how

I lean forward anyway
And lick away some of the frosting
You moan
And I know you taste sweeter than ever.
There's everything beautiful within you,
Not a single flaw,
Begging for love,
but shutting it down,
There's truly everything lonely within you,
But it's such tragic irony.

As soon as I can hold you,
Once again,
I won't let go I swear,
We can't leave us behind,
Anymore,
We've watched clocks turn,
Glared as days burn,
Trying to catch the ashes,
Between my elusive fingertips.

The hardest of catch,
Wanting competition but scared,
Of not matching expectation,
As I'm battered and bruised,
Broken in two,
And who the hell am I?
Not feeling like you're good enough for anyone.
I guess I just want something deep,
I no longer want some flimsy fantasy
Spending my time dreaming of what could be
I want to take my time to get to know
Every shining quality like the stars of my beau
It would be just the two of us
Wrapped within the warmth of summer's arms
Forever in a cocoon
Feeling safe, and we would even dare to dream
that we would continue on forever unharmed
Protected in the amniotic sac of our love
Simultaneously grounding us
And shooting us up into the stars

Something so deep,
Tethering me to sanity
And ungrounding me to possibility
Weaving within my very veins the certainty of my lover's loyalty
And at the same time reveling within romantic spontaneity
Oh, how sweet and uncalculated this fine and complex dance of living can be
Spinning in rehearsed circles and always coming back to the heart of all the things that could be and ever will be
And yet my life is a mere breeze
On a desert plain
Blowing away the sands of both my happiness and pain
And what else could I say,
Except it's been a beautiful, heart wretching, eye opening, wisdom gaining, heart expanding ride?
And when I find this love of mine,
Our love will defy the very concept of time
We will have love that is so deep
That it will continue on into eternity.
We were both selfishly beautiful in our own way.
Wanting to steal the heavens no matter who we betray.

The nights we would meet always went down in vain.

Some evenings she would paint the skies with her decorated lies
but I would strike with lightning and drown it out in rain.

Then other times, when she’s closing the curtains to people’s days
by letting the colors of her eyes vibrantly display

I will come kiss her in the sky
and we become the gods that paint the atmosphere alive.
Dared and took a chance to hoping you'll remain.
Anxious and broken with the same cycle all over again.
Numbness settled deep in our very souls.
Never alone but the loneliness always follows.
Years with you would finally take away the longing and pain.
Next time would be better.
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